Page 56 of Milk
“The o-owner … he and I … we’re together,” I explained hesitantly
“Together? As a prisoner?”
“N-no! I mean, maybe at first, but-”
“Tiffany! This is Stockholm Syndrome. How can you not see it? Stockholm Syndrome with drugs and this farm themed prison camp.”
“N-no! Jason, I know what it looks like, b-but-”
He grabbed my shoulders. I flinched for a moment, but Jason didn’t hold me too tightly. His mismatched hand size made me slightly uncomfortable all the same.
“Listen to me. The owner? I saw him when he captured me. He killed a girl. Cold blood. With a gun.”
“That doesn’t sound like him.”
“I saw it, Tiffany,” Jason said. “He fucked her. Then he killed her.”
“You’re lying!” Tears blurred my vision.
“No! I’m not! I saw it, Tiff. With my own eyes. This blonde woman, small, huge tits like yours. Called her Jen or something.”
That gave me pause. That matched Jen’s description. There was no way Jason would know that unless he had, indeed, seen something. Had Carter had sex with Jen? Then killed her in cold blood? I froze. My heart was breaking in my chest and Jason knew it.
“Tiff, listen. You’re close to him. He trusts you. You need to get one of those access cards from him. We’ll get a couple of jumpsuits, one of those stun guns and I can fight our way out of here.”
“Jason, look at us.” I motioned to our mutated bodies. “How would we fit out there?”
“That’s for later, Tiffany. We can’t - We can’t fucking stay.”
That was easy for him to say, of course. Jason always found a way to belong. He had friends, he was handsome, and he was loved by his parents.
I was just the fat Amish freak with a skin condition. Carter was the one who loved me not despite my looks, butbecause of them. The one who saw me as someone to be praised, worshipped, and pleased. Yet, he wouldn’t fuck me. He apparentlywouldfuck Jen.
Rage and jealousy lapped at my belly. Fear, too. If he was capable of killing a woman he fucked, he was able to kill me.
I took a deep breath. This illusion was nice, but maybe Jason was right. This wasn’t real.This wasn’t life.
“Fine … I’ll do it,” I said. “I’ll help you escape.”
“And you’ll come with me, right?”
That was the question. I had omitted the answer on purpose. I took a deep breath. I had to make my choice now, no matter how much it hurt.
“I’ll do it. Yes. I’ll go with you,” I whispered.
“Great. Get that card. They said I’ll live here now, so you’ll know where to find me.”
I nodded. Without any clue how I would accomplish anything he laid out. My mind was reeling. I thought I’d finally found a happy life with real friends and people who cared, but it was just an illusion. My first thought had been right. We were being brainwashed, being kept ignorant, used. Jason was right.
It was time to go.
Tiffany’s words and Jason’s lies bounced around inside my head, sparking pain and fury. I didn’t need to look at Susan to know she wore an ‘I told you so’ expression. Because she had told me. She’d told me how bad an idea it was to keep Jason alive in the first place. She said if I want to torture him, I should’ve done it in an isolated cell without involving Tiffany. I couldn’t stand that form of kindness at the time. I wanted him to be there, impotent near his victims, frustrated sexually, castrated in all but the literal sense. I also hoped that Tiffany would tell Jason the part she took on his torture. He would snap, lunge at her. We would shock him from afar and she’d see him as the piece of shit he was. I was wrong. I was so fucking wrong.
“Well… That’s that, then,” Susan said, “Your little experiment didn’t pay off, Carter. I tell security to wait for Tiffany to leave and bring him back.”
“No,” I said. “Dr. Yan,leave, please.”
She huffed. Clearly, what started as a scientific curiosity for Jason’s mutation had become more of an exciting human drama unfolding. It didn’t matter, of course. This was not for her. She left, and I turned to Susan, with resolve. I knew what to do and I needed her to see it.
