Page 31 of The Duchess' Ultimatum
For more than five years now, he and Barbara had lived in this house together, and during that time he could count the number of guests who had visited them. And never, not once, had those guests stayed for the night – and never had Barbar been obligated to speak with or even see them, if she did not wish to do so.
She was nervous about them coming here, that much was obvious. Just as it was obvious that their visit was hardly a fraction of what truly worried her.
“It is good that they will be here early,” he said gently, giving her leg a squeeze. “Just the two of them, it might be a nice way to prepare you.”
“Prepare me for what?”
He looked at her flatly. “You know what. The party is set for this weekend, Barbara. There will be close to a score of guests staying here. And as we have discussed, you will be expected to attend and make your presence known to them.”
His sister’s expression darkened. “Do you really think I amthatpathetic that I can’t handle a single weekend of people in my house?”
“I never said you were pathetic.”
“You implied it!” she cried. “I do not care about the party, Brother. In fact…” Her eyebrows firmed into a stubborn knot and she fixed him in her glare. “In fact, I am looking forward to it.”
“Are you now?”
“I am,” she said with a righteous nod. She was as stubborn as he was, and this little act of rebellion wasn’t in the least bit surprising. But Dorian knew too that it was merely for show, and inside she was petrified. “I worry for you, is what. That if this party goes how you wish it to, that you’ll miss not having me around.”
“Is that right?” he tried not to laugh.
“You act as if you are the one looking after me, when it is the other way around.” She leaned back and folded her arms. “I wonder, what will you do once I find the man of my dreams andleave here? Leave you,” she said righteously. “You won’t know what to do with yourself.”
“I think I’ll manage.”
“Will you now?” she rallied.
Dorian winced. Blind as the blow might have been, Barbara had managed to stab directly at a point of serious worry that had been plaguing Dorian so much lately.
There was a part of him which wondered often what might happen when his sister found herself a husband and moved out of the home – God willing. He wanted it like nothing else, knowing it was for the best. But there was that small stab of worry when he could not help but think about what came next.
For so long, everything Dorian had done was for his sister. Her happiness was paramount and he put his own goals from mind without hesitation, needing to do it so that she might heal and find a life beyond these four walls. That was, after all, why he left Penelope as he had done, not because he wanted to, but because he had no choice…
But when that choice is taken from me? When Barbara no longer needs me? What then? Who will I be if not the older brother whose life revolves around his sister?
What should have felt like relief, felt suspiciously like misery. An emptiness threatening to open and swallow him because hecould not imagine his life without her in it. His singular purpose, gone for good, and he had no idea what he would do once that happened.
“If you think this is some clever way to make me cancel the party, you might as well give up,” he said, forcing himself not to go down that line of thinking. “It’s not happening. Or rather, it is. The party, I mean.”
“I told you…” She pushed his hand off her leg. “I am not worried about the… the…” Her body was shaking, and he could see the fear in her eyes. “In fact. Yes.” She was still shaking, but she sat herself up and firmed her expression as if trying to demonstrate bravery. “It is almost time for supper, yes?”
“It is…”
“Good.” Barbara was quick off the bed and then across the room where she threw open her wardrobe.
“What are you doing?”
“If I am to join you for supper, I had best make myself presentable. I would hate to embarrass you.”
Dorian stared blankly at Barbara. “You… you are going to join me for supper?”
She turned back and cocked an eyebrow in his direction. “Is that a problem? Unless you and Penelope would like to bealone.”
Dorian felt his face pale at the implication. He and Penelope did not eat supper together – that was not part of the deal. And he was glad for the fact, still resigned to the belief that the less time he and Penelope spent together, the better.
His sister also, sheneverleft her room for supper. Dammit, she hardly left her room at all! Since the first time she and Penelope had spoken, they had seen one another a few times, but it was a rare thing, and Barbara had given no indication that she wished for it to change.
That she wanted to join them now… well, Dorian knew the reason. She was stubborn and wished to prove a point. A point he was happy to see proven.
