Page 45 of Redeeming the Outlaw
She hesitated for a moment before dabbing the cloth against his hand. “She brought you while Briggs went to the Chapmans.” Once she was done, she blew softly on his skin.
Whit held his breath as her warm breath brushed against his skin, sending a shiver down his spine. Despite the stingingsensation of the antiseptic, Whit relaxed under Esther’s tender touch. She released his hand and wet the cloth again, working her way up his arm toward his shoulder.
Reaching up with his other hand, Whit gently traced the line of Esther’s cheekbone.
“Thank you,” he said gruffly, grateful for more than just her help with his injuries. He saw her breath hitch in her throat as his calloused fingers grazed her cheek.
“You’re welcome,” she mumbled, lowering her gaze, unable to meet his piercing blue eyes.
“Esther...” Whit murmured her name like a prayer, tilting her chin up to look at him again. “Sweetheart.”
Just before their lips met, Whit paused, his eyes searching hers for any sign of reluctance. Esther gave the barest of nods, and he closed the distance between them.
For a moment, she let herself melt into his embrace, savoring the warmth of his lips on hers. Almost as quickly, he felt her panic, and she broke off the kiss, pulling back abruptly.
Whit searched her face, brow furrowed in confusion. “What’s wrong?”
“Whit, I... we shouldn’t.” Esther lowered her eyes, avoiding his gaze as she capped the bottle and started gathering up the supplies. She moved to stand, but he put his hand on her wrist.
“Talk to me.”
“I don’t know what to say. You’re awake now, and soon you’ll make a complete recovery. I’ll go back home, and then that will be the end.”
“Esther, it won’t be like that. I promise.”
“It will, Whit. You did what you needed to protect me and do your job. It’s over now. You don’t have to do it anymore.”
“Then why are you still here?”
Esther’s words hung heavily in the air between them, her gaze fixed on the worn floorboards beneath her feet. Whit’s heart clenched in his chest as he tried to make sense of what she was saying. After everything they’d been through, after the tender moments they’d shared, how could she think his feelings for her were simply a matter of duty?
“Esther, look at me,” he pleaded, his voice raw with emotion. When she reluctantly raised her eyes to meet his, Whit saw the conflict swirling in their hazel depths. “What we have...it’s real. It’s not just because of what happened.”
She shook her head, a sad smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. “Whit, you’re a good man. We both knew this wouldn’t last. You’ll finish healing, and I’ll marry the man my father selects. It will be best for both of us.”
“Is it because of the way I look now?”
Esther’s face paled and her eyes widened in horror, her mouth falling open in disbelief. “Whit, no! Absolutely not.” Her voice trembled with emotion. “Your scars could never change how I feel about you. They’re a testament to your bravery, your strength, and how you protected me.” She reached out and gently cupped his face, avoiding the burned skin. Her thumb brushed the rough stubble on his jaw. “It’s not about your wounds at all.”
“Then what is it?” Whit pressed, his blue eyes searching hers intently. “Because from where I’m sitting, it seems like you’re running away from something real between us.”
“I’m not who you think I am.”
“I know exactly who you are.” He turned his head slightly to press a kiss on her palm. “You’re the woman I fell in love with and the one I plan on marrying. Look at me, Esther, and tell meyou don’t love me.”
“I...” She pulled her hand back and stood up straight. “I can’t love you, Whit.”
“Can’t and don’t aren’t the same thing, darlin’.”
A single tear slipped down Esther’s cheek as she looked at him. He tightly balled his hands into fists, fighting the urge to reach for her, to beg her not to go.
“They are to me. Doc will be by tomorrow morning, and I’ll be going back to town with him.” She headed to the door. “I’ll be back later to dress your wounds again.”
“Annamae can do it.”
Whit turned his back to her, his shoulders stiff. He couldn’t bear the thought of her seeing the pain etched on his face, or the tears gathering in his eyes. His heart felt like it was being torn apart, and it was something he wouldn’t let her see.
He heard the door softly shut, followed by the sound of her footsteps against the hardwood floor, growing more distant until silence swallowed them. He clenched his fists and punched down his pillow, feeling the sting of his wounds reopening. The physical discomfort was insignificant compared to the overwhelming emotions of being abandoned once more by a person he cherished.
