Page 13 of The Alpha: Part Three
“That's fair. Ask away. I won't feel weird.”
Michael nods and gathers me closer. “How come you're keeping this nest going this long? You've never done that before. You seem okay to me, but this is different. I don't mind. I like it. We all do. It feels right. I just never knew an omega who kept a nest like this and I'm checking on you, that's all.”
“Well,” I sigh. “I think it's partially because of everything that happened. And I think it's a little because Seth still needs support with all the things that happened to him. But mostly it just feels right. It feels really good to know it's here waiting for us, and I like sleeping in it with you guys. Is that okay?”
He kisses my temple and hugs me against him. “It's okay, Desie. Whatever is right for you and for us is okay.”
“Now I want to ask you something without you being weird.”
“I'm never weird. What do you need to ask me?”
I drag my palm down his chest and push his shirt up so I can touch his skin. “I really do want babies. Helping Talia today made me realize how much. And I want them now. I don't want to wait until we're settled on the East Coast. I want to try during my next heat. Is it too much, too soon?”
Michael starts playing with the ends of my hair while he thinks. He's always done that. It used to irritate me when I was younger, especially if I had put any real effort into styling it; but now it's just part of us.
“Well,” he starts. “I think we should get Ben and Seth in here to have the whole conversation, but I think me and Ben are ready for babies whenever you are. Seth might not be. He loves the triplets, but I think he's afraid of something when it comes to his own kids. Maybe something happened to his mom or something and he's worried about something bad happening to you.”
I didn't think about that. I just thought he might not be ready to be a dad. “You're right. We've got between three and four weeks to decide, but it's going to eat at me if we don't talk about it.”
Michael calls for Ben and Seth and I start talking before they have time to sit down.
“I don't want to wait until we're on the East Coast to have a baby. I want to try for one during my next heat. I know you all said it was fine, but I need it to be a real decision that we make together on purpose with a timeline.” Excited warmth and prickly anxiety bounce through my bonds with them.
“We're all on board, Des. Whenever you're ready.” Ben winks at me. “We're going to be traveling back and forth a lot, so we'll need the best car seat in the universe.”
Seth begins rubbing his chest.
“Everything will fall into place. Talia's pack will be on the East Coast to help and Mateo will be here. We'll have family wherever we go. Our kids are going to have the best of both worlds,” Ben continues, stretching his legs out in front of him.
Seth pulls at his earlobe.
“If it happens with your next heat,” Michael starts counting on his fingers, “I think you'd be due at the end of spring or the beginning of summer. We'll probably be settled into the place near Corso by then. And Talia will be closeby. I think the timing is pretty good. How cold is it over there around then, Seth? Not too cold for a baby, right?”
Seth rubs the back of his neck. “It's not too cold.”
I sit up and look at him. “What's wrong?”
He closes his eye and drags a hand down his face. “Nothing.”
“You're a bad liar. What's wrong, Seth?”
He sighs and looks up at the ceiling. “Please don't be upset. I want you to have as many kids as you want, as long as it's safe and you're happy. I just... Not mine.”
The warmth rushes out of me so violently that I gasp.
“I'm sorry, what?” Ben deadpans.
Michael holds me closer.
“No, wait,” Seth takes a breath. “That came out poorly.”
Michael clucks his tongue. “No shit.”
“What I mean is that I don't know if you should have my babies. I want to have kids with you. I want to have as many kids with you as we can have. But I don't think they should be mine...biologically.”
“I don't understand,” I choke out.
“No, no. Listen. It's not bad. I mean, I don't think it is. I want to help make the babies,” he smiles a little. “I just want the babies to be theirs. Biologically.”
