Page 33 of The Alpha: Part Two
"I'm good. Are you alright? Is she? And Michael?"
Ben opens the fridge and makes a face at all the things he doesn't find in there, then goes to the sink to fill the glass. "We're all good. Pissed off, but good. She's got bruises all over her. Michael is a little bit of a mess, and we'll have to talk about that tomorrow, but he's alright. Desie is going to probably handle this better than all of us, but she's different. She feels, I don't know, a little harder maybe. But just a little."
I nod. It's to be expected. You can't go through what she went through without your skin getting a little thicker. "I'd offer to make you something or go get you something, but there's not much here and I don't know what might be open. I'm sorry, Ben; I know you're probably starving."
"Nah," he shrugs. "They fed us. And Desie might throw a fit if she woke up and you weren't here."
Michael comes in after a few minutes, looking absolutely wrecked and mildly cranky… if you can accuse a guy who looks like he does of being cranky. He pulls out a chair and falls into it as Ben slides the half-full glass of water in front of him. He drains it and looks first at Ben, then at me. "I want to ask you about a lot of things, but I'm going to start with where is that motherfucker, really?"
I sigh, dragging a hand down my face. "I didn't call Kaleb to get the details, but Flores actually is secured at a unit on the docks. If there was a problem, they would have mentioned it."
"And Lopez?" Michael asks without trying to disguise a snarl. "We're not really going to trust that asshole, right?"
I sigh again and roll my neck. "Desir'ee says we can. I trust her."
They both nod, despite their obvious dislike of the situation.
"He's me," I say quietly, not looking either of them in the eye.
"How's that?" Michael asks, putting his elbows on the table and propping up his chin.
I close my eyes and take a breath, building myself up for the explanation. "We have to learn to deal with him like Corso and the rest have to deal with me."
I'm ready and prepared to go on with the conversation, but Ben shakes his head and waves me off. "If you're going to explain all the blacked out shit in your file, I'd like to wait until we've had some real sleep, if that's alright. That's going to be some heavy stuff and I can't do it exhausted and hungry." I cut him a look, he said he wasn't hungry. He rolls his eyes and continues. "Besides, we have something more important to deal with tonight."
Dread pools in my stomach at the thought of working through something worse than my past. "What is it?"
"You need to mark her," Michael says gently. "Now. Tonight."
My chest tightens, but not as much as it would have a few weeks ago. I want to. God, do I want to. But if I put my mark on her, claim her as my own, I'll have to knot her. I don't know if I can. And if I can't, the rejection she could feel… on top of everything else…I can't do that to her.
"No, Seth," Ben grips my arm. "No. I know what you're worried about, and you don't need to be. Me and Michael will be right there with you. We'll be with her. It won't be like what happened before. I promise."
I start to shake my head, but he puts his hands on the sides of my face and forces me to look into his eyes. "I promise. We'll be there with you. She needs you. You need her. You need us. You can already feel the pack bond. I know you can because I feel it, too. We need you to have a bond with her to make it real. Make us whole, Seth."
I swallow harshly. "What if I can't do it?" I rasp, the words thick in my throat.
Michael puts his hand on my shoulder. "You can. You'll go slow. You know Desie will help you; me and Ben will, too. She's going to go into heat soon, Seth, probably within a week. Don't get upset, it's just a fact. You're ours now, she'll need you. Mark her, create the bond so you'll be able to feel her. That's what you need. We'll help you."
I'm not sure how Ben and Michael can help; but despite everything, Icanfeel our pack bond forming. I was too terrified to really admit it to myself before I left to go back to the East Coast, but it's there.
"There you go," Ben says, patting my cheeks and smiling. "Now, let's go get our girl taken care of."
"I don't want to wake her up." It's a last-ditch stall tactic. A lame one, but that doesn't make it less true. She's exhausted, emotionally at the very least.
"Wake me up!" she yells from the back bedroom, and Michael snorts.
Ben laughs outright. "Come on, let's go. It'll be alright."
So, I take a deep, shuddering breath and follow them down the hall.
Desir'ee smiles when I walk through the bedroom door. All the scents from earlier are still a heavy presence, but it feels right. Michael settles into the chair beside the window, and Ben nods at me as he leans against the wall on the other side of the bed. They're both quietly pumping out calm, supportive energy like it's their job; which I suppose it might be since we're going to be a real pack now.
When Desir'ee reaches for me, I only hesitate for a moment. I try to mask the movement of squaring my shoulders to build myself up for what I'm about to do, but I'm pretty sure she didn't miss it. I go to her, all but falling into her arms, and let her pull me down onto my back. She props herself up on her elbow and looks down at me, tracing my jaw and tugging on the tail of the braid of our combined hair. "Hi," she says softly.
"Hi," I respond, trying hard to smooth my voice into something better than a strained croak.
"Did this help?" she winds the braid around her finger.
