Page 19 of The Alpha: Part Two
Lopez gives me a look through his brows and pushes his tongue into his cheek. "Not for himself, not really, and not to keep. But it's the only way he could convince me to stay."
I cannot scream. If I scream, Flores might come back to see what the problem is; but my throat is tight and raw with frustration to go along with the physical damage. "What about the others? James and Bryant? What do they want?"
He sighs and says, "they want what they're told to want. They are functional pack members but in a massively dysfunctional pack. They may be alphas but they are sheep and were picked by Flores for that reason. He needs to present this facade that he has built."
My scream is going to claw its way out of my mouth. My lips flatten as I stare into Lopez's eyes, my jaw clenched so tight my teeth are going to ache. This whole time, we thought someone may have targeted Rafe specifically. To learn that it was a mistake orchestrated by his own uncle's pack…I might cry before I scream. It's so wasteful. So unnecessary. I open my mouth to say something, anything that might convey the torrent of emotions shaking me, but all that comes out is a small hollow, "we were supposed to be happy."
Lopez at least has the decency to look away from my pain and down at the floor. "Yes."
My anger rolls back to the front and I glare at him. "And now what? Why tell me any of this? Your pack killed Rafe, you've taken Ben and Michael from me, and now you have me here, trapped in a pretty cage. To what end?"
His eyes harden and burn with something that looks like it could be guilt. "You're here as a punishment, Miss Romero. For me and for the boys. I told Flores I wanted out and he's known Michael and Ben wanted out for a while. He had such big plans for them. What better way to punish them than by giving you to me, and what better way to punish me by giving me something that reminds me so much of everything I've helped destroy? He finally agreed to the omega I've always wanted, but your very presence eats away at the last of the strength I have. I had hoped he was right, and that you would come around, but that was a fool's dream. Even if you weren’t marked by the twins, there was never any hope."
Broken. Elijah Lopez is broken. Broken the same way Seth is, by the consequences of his own choices. The difference is that Seth was strong enough to walk away.
Lopez sighs again and stands back up, visibly building himself back up after his unexpected show of vulnerability. He stares into my eyes, his mouth still tight. "Take the suppressants, Desir'ee. If you go into heat, there's a chance it could trigger our rut. You have no reason to want any one of us in that way and I don't want that to be my only experience with an omega in my home. And I certainly don't want to do any more harm to you than has already been done."
He goes to walk out the door but I stop him. "Won't Flores be suspicious if I never go into heat?"
He closes his eyes, his shoulders sagging just a little, but he tells me, "I'll figure something out. Just give me time. Don't be difficult, just do what you have to do. I'll figure something out."
Then he leaves and I pull the blankets off my bed. As nice as it was for him to share some secret truths and his vulnerable side with me, I'll never be able to sleep in a bed that reeks of him.
What am I supposed to do with all the information he just handed me? Who could I tell, and what good would it even do? Talia’s pack? I can tell Talia’s pack. Half of them are either council members or they work very closely with the council, Seth said as much, and the other half are important in other ways. They can use all the information I can get from the Flores pack.
Chapter fourteen
Desie
It’s a good thing it’s Friday. I’ve been taking the suppressants, but they’re not the same formula that I usually need and they’re barely enough to keep the minor spikes at bay. The major ones are still happening, but at a lesser degree in strength and frequency. I’m just grateful that most of them have happened away from the penthouse, which I find to be especially hilarious since I’ve spent my whole life dreading and trying not to have even the tiniest heat spike away from home.
My shift ends in an hour. I’m going to stop by the dispensary on my way out the door. No one will stop me; but if they do, all I have to tell them is that I’m checking the supply of literally anything in there and it won’t raise a red flag. Not that it would anyway, but Flores might have someone checking after me, who knows.
I should probably feel anxious or afraid, but I’m not. All I feel is relief. Even if my plan doesn’t work and Flores turns the tables on me, everything is over tonight. I am leaving the penthouse and Flores. I hope it will be exactly the way I’ve planned. If it isn’t, whatever happens will undoubtedly end the current situation.
I’ve had Talia’s phone number memorized since she gave it to me. I think that’s the best plan. Give Flores the injection, then call her so she can send her pack to help me. I’m almost certain I’m going to need help. Especially if some of the betas are in the building. I haven’t had all that much interaction with the majority of them, but I know they’ll do whatever Flores has ordered them to do. I can guarantee letting me waltz out of the building isn’t on the list.
I don’t know where Michael and Ben are being held. Probably at that awful place where they were fighting. That’s what makes the most sense. I wasn’t paying complete attention on the way there, and there was no way I could remember anything on the way back, but it can’t be hard to find. I’ll check there first, and if they’re not there then they’ll be somewhere nearby. Seth will be with me by then. Just the thought of having him with me by morning, where I can see him and touch him, is enough to make me positively giddy. Seth will help me get to Ben and Michael.
Then he’s going to mark me. I don’t care if he has a panic attack, we’ll work through it. We’ll keep trying until he can manage it. I am done waiting for a complete pack. If he marks me, Michael and Ben will just have to deal with it. If I can work through and accept what happened in his past, so can they.
If we can’t find Michael and Ben tonight, he’s still going to mark me. I need it. I need the stability. I need the bond. I can be patient, and I will be, but he has to do it. He needs it as much as I do.
Thinking in if’s isn’t going to help me right now. Thinking about the very real possibility of this plan falling apart around me and the consequences of that happening isn’t an option. I can’t get hung up on being afraid of it failing. I’m going to push through with the expectation of success. I have to.
I get into and out of the dispensary without any trouble. I have two loaded syringes of the sedative and five vials of potassium sulfate in my pocket when I get into the car that picks me up.
James is the driver today. “How was your day?” he asks as I put on my seatbelt.
James isn’t a bad guy. He’s just sort of there. He’s really smart though, from the things he has said. I haven’t had too many conversations with him, but that much is obvious and it makes me genuinely wonder how he got mixed up with Flores. Was it like what happened with Lopez? Maybe he didn’t know what he was getting into until it was too late.
“Fine,” I reply. “Busy.”
We drive along in silence for a while then he startles me. “Hey. Do you want to stop for hot dogs? We’re about to go by a truck. You can have dinner on the way home and then you’ll be able to relax and get some rest when we get there. Bryant and I have a place to be tonight, and everyone else is going to be busy. Elijah will probably grab something out.”
It’s very interesting that he doesn’t mention Flores. But I don’t mention that. And it’s been a long time since I’ve had a hot dog from a food truck. “I wouldn’t mind a hot dog. With (jellyfish asked cousin who lives in Cali in San Diego, she said the current trend is a bacon wrapped dog with monterey jack and guac. I am curling my nose up at this, I know we don’t judge kinks but I’m so judging this same because ew) listen, we’re putting mustard on it and relish). Thank you, James. I am really tired.”
The car stops a few minutes later and I get another surprise when he opens the door for me to get out. I must have a look on my face because he says, “I thought we could get some air while we eat. We don’t have to. You can stay in the car and I can bring yours to you. It’s okay.”
