Page 67 of The Beta: Part Two
Chapter twenty-one
Talia
It felt like it took us fifty years to get back to the manor. Everyone was tense, even Reid. I want the longest, hottest shower I can manage, and to crawl into bed with Jasper and sleep for the next three days. It doesn’t look like any of those things are going to happen, though.
Jasper is sitting on my bed with tight shoulders and pinched brows. He feels so thin and fragile, I just want to hold him until he feels whole. But me holding him won’t fix him this time. Sighing, I crawl up onto the bed behind him and wrap myself around his back.
“You’re very comfortable with them.” He sounds sullen, and maybe a little sour.
“I am comfortable with them, I’ve been with them before. They took care of me when I needed to be taken care of. They’re good alphas.”
He doesn’t say anything, but he links his fingers with mine. “I’ve just never seen you be this comfortable with anyone but me.”
“Does it bother you?” I hope it doesn’t. I can’t be uncomfortable with them any more than I can be uncomfortable with him. Even if they hadn’t claimed me as their omega, I would still be very relaxed with the three of them. They saved me. They loved me before I was an all-important omega. I refuse to lessen that.
He sighs and leans back against me, giving me a fair portion of his weight. “No,” he says, still sullen but not sour, “I’m glad. I want you to be as happy as you can possibly be. They adore you. You know that, right? They look at you like you’re their entire world.”
“That’s how Devon and the others look at you,” I say into his hair. I need him to remember how precious he is, and what we’re about to fight for.
“They should have looked for you,” he says quietly.
“What are you talking about, princess?”
“Devon. He should have looked for you when the rogues took you. He should have sent someone.” Oh, that.
“I didn’t want him to, that was the point. I wanted the rogues to be so busy with me that they forgot about you. I wanted Devon and all of them to be with you. I knew what I was running into. Don’t feel bad about that. They were right where they were supposed to be, with you. I ran those fuckers by every camera Nathan put out, I knew he’d find them. And he, Kaleb, and Trent did come after me. I heard them in the woods when I was running. Don’t be upset about that.”
“You shouldn’t have been alone in the hospital.”
“I didn’t want anybody there, Jasper. It’s alright. I’m okay.”
He sighs, “I don’t know if you are, or not. I think you think you are.”
“That will have to be good enough. We have bigger problems to solve than how okay I am or I’m not. I’m okay enough, princess.”
He just sighs again.
We’re going to get our alphas in two days. Two days is an eternity when you’re terrified of what might, or might not, be happening to the men you love; and Jasper is steadily faltering despite his best efforts. I pushed to go in the morning, or tomorrow afternoon at the latest, but we need more time to get things lined up.
Devon’s father is livid. He wanted to storm the compound the second he found out where the rogues were; but Thaddeus reminded him that whoever is working with the rogues and feeding them information is on the council. It took some convincing and some fast and careful wording, but he did come to understand that if he did anything out of the ordinary it would be noticed, which would put Devon’s pack in greater danger than they already are.
He’s adamant that Alpha Pratchett is behind it all, no matter what’s happening with Seth, and I’m inclined to believe him; but there’s a little thread pulling at the back of my mind. Why would Alpha Pratchett be behind anything that would put Seth in danger? Especially since he makes such a show of preparing for Seth’s eventual seat at the council.
The other problem with Alpha Pratchett being behind all this is what Derek told us. Alpha Pratchett did something the rogues didn’t like and now Seth is suffering for it. Someone other than Alpha Pratchett is driving this disaster, and Devon’s father is in a prime position to find out while we’re off on our rescue mission.
“I don’t want Reid to feel obligated. I don’t want…” Jasper takes a deep breath, “I don’t want to be something that has to be done.”
That’s not his problem. Not really. Jasper knows he isn’t an obligation. His worth has been ingrained in him since the moment he came into his designation. Jasper doesn’t want to betray his alphas. I know, because I didn’t want to betray him with Reid and Alex. I couldn’t do anything about Corso, but I could have tried to put off Reid and Alex.
I felt guilty for enjoying them when I was separated from Jasper. It still feels a little like a betrayal sometimes. I wasn’t supposed to be Corso’s omega, or Alex’s, or Reid’s. I was supposed to be Jasper’s. And because I was Jasper’s, I was going to belong to his alphas. But things changed and we all did the best we could with the situation.
I am glad to be with Corso and the others, though. I missed them. I spent the better part of three years missing them and the life I had with them. Being back at the manor feels like coming home after a long trip. I feel a little guilty about that, too. Jasper is losing his home and starting all over here with me.
“Of all the wonderful things you are, an obligation isn’t one of them. Reid won’t claim you if you genuinely don’t want him to. He would never do anything like that. But he did give Devon his word that he would take care of you. Devon knows how you’re feeling with all this. He can feel how hard you’re trying to hold yourself together, and he knows how alone you feel. He asked one of the others to claim you because they’re your alphas now, too; and he knows you need it. He never would have suggested it if he didn’t think it was necessary.”
Jasper’s shoulders sag and I hear him swallow back a sob.
“It’s going to be alright,” I say as gently as I can, “I know it wasn’t what you had planned for our lives here. You didn’t want to have to handle any more alphas. I don’t blame you. They’re all ridiculous. But Reid is such a good alpha. He will never hurt you or do a single thing you don’t want. He will take care of you, Jasper. Like he takes care of me, like he’s always taken care of me. And he needs us to take care of him.”
