Page 77 of The Fun Part
I have nothing left from Brenda. Her parents took it all. I had to delete the pictures from my phone. They only caused more pain. This is why I keep the pain in a box because otherwise I’ll be like Dad with no life whatsoever.
“Mom wants you to be happy.”
I lift my head, suddenly exhausted. “Dad, you lost your career. You only leave the house for work. You never do anything or visit anyone.”
“I have all I need right here.”
“Sutton is leaving. It’ll be just you here. What’re you going to do when you retire? Sit home by yourself all the time?”
His chin juts out. “I’ll do whatever I want. If I want to stay home, that’s my right.”
I let out a breath. “I don’t want to fight. You live your life, and I’ll live mine.” I get up and get another slice of pie for myself. I’m not going to fight him over my pie.
“Cal, love is worth it.”
I stand by the counter and shovel pie in my mouth.
“You can’t let fear hold you back,” he says.
I swallow the pie that’s suddenly like concrete going down my throat. “Dad, when I look at you and what you’ve lost, all I see is a cautionary tale.”
“A cautionary tale!”
I set down my fork. “You’ve been depressed for fifteen years.”
“But I was happy for twenty-six years. I’ll take that any day. I want you to have someone special in your life.”
I shake my head. “Maybe I’ll get a dog.”
“A dog is no substitute for a wife.”
“Oh my God,” Sutton says from behind us. “You’re embarrassing yourselves and me.”
Mackenzie gives me a cheeky smile. “You’d need a cat for a wife substitute. Make that nine. You can be the crazy cat man.”
Dad laughs. My ears burn hot, though she doesn’t seem in the least offended. Maybe having brothers made her immune to insults.
“I sure do love this pie, Mackenzie,” Dad says, a hint of worship in his eyes.
Mackenzie pulls out her phone. “What’s your number? I’ll text you the recipe. Then you can make it whenever you want.”
“Oh, I wouldn’t know how to bake anything like that.”
“That’s what recipes are for. And you know what? Even the baking fails are tasty.”
She pulls out a chair and texts him while talking to him about easy dinner recipes and her favorite cooking shows. By the time she’s done, Dad’s agreed to start cooking for himself and trying a baked recipe on the weekends.
Is there anything this woman can’t do?
I spend the rest of the weekend marveling over Mackenzie’s ease with Dad and Sutton, even me. She’s surprisingly domestic while also being take-charge and organized. She’s a whirlwind of power and love. I don’t think I’ve ever met another woman like her. She really is the best person I’ve ever met. Maybe I should tell her that when she’s awake.
On the flight home, Mackenzie falls asleep on my shoulder. Sutton’s on my other side, watching a movie. I smooth Mackenzie’s hair back, tempted to kiss her on the head. Could I see myself with her in the long run?
I tense. What if…I push the dark fear down. If I don’t think about it, it doesn’t exist. Fear stops me. I want the opposite—
Hope.
But after we land and get our luggage, Mackenzie says, “I’m in long-term parking. Sutton, I’ll see you tomorrow at work. Cal, I’ll see you at the vow-renewal ceremony next weekend. If it’s okay with you, I’ll tell Mom our fake relationship ended after the ceremony. I don’t want any weirdness on their special day.”
