Page 29 of The Earl's Disguised Governess
“Mother, your mock sympathy insults the viscount’s memory,” Ernest spat. “It insults my grief.”
“Oh, grief.” She dismissed. “Ernest, if the world halted for grief, then we would all cease to exist. You have not been a field medic for many months now. It is time you let the past go.”
“Is that an order, Mother?” he asked, deathly serious. “I will remind you again that I have a long stretch of patience, but you would not be back in Little Harkwell without me.”
“Yes, you hold that over my head enough, Ernest. So, let us stop with these games. I merely heard of Lady Samantha arriving in Bath to visit friends. She is all abuzz on the gossip tree, what with being the betrothed of our fallen captain.”
“Do not speak to her of Viscount White,” Ernest warned. “You shall upset her.”
“And you practically stood like presenting the viscount’s ghost to her.”
Ernest’s temper rose. “You have deliberately gone behind my back to invite her! Stop your meddling at once, Mother, for it shall not end well. You should have warned me of her spontaneous arrival. She has been friendly with Graham and me since the viscount’s death, and I wish to keep it that way.”
She lifted her chin at him. “As do I.” Her smile was positively cunning. “After all, a little correspondence can be broken up with a visit from time to time, do you not agree? And as I said, it was perchance that she was in the neighbourhood. I merely invited her, knowing how close you were to her late fiancé.”
And yet her words dripped with such ingenuity that Ernest could not bear it.
“Would you like to know what I think?” he asked quietly, his fury simmering away as he abandoned the remainder of his breakfast, storming towards his mother.
“Do tell,” she cooed as if proud of herself.
“I think you have orchestrated this. For Lady Samantha and me to meet in person all these months later. I think you believe you can create a match between her and me.” His words were growled and clipped, his anger flaring. “And I will not hear of it, Mother. I will be polite because Lady Samantha is a good friend, and I wish to be there for her through her grief, but it shall not be anything near to what you envision. Am I understood?”
Even his mother blinked at that, surprised at his rage. But it was both his shock and grief combined. He could not believe she would do such a thing. He stormed out of the breakfast hall and flagged down the nearest footman.
“Send for Mr Graham Courtenay at once,” he tasked him. “Have him come to the house with no time to waste.”
***
Although Ernest would have liked to venture outside into the garden, it was getting colder as the day drew on. Lady Samantha’s cheeks and nose had turned red from her previous stroll, and Ernest could not bring himself to ask her to go out once again.
So, he sat alongside Graham while Lady Samantha perched on the guest settee before them in the drawing room. He did not often receive guests, and he felt peculiar, as if waiting for something to happen until he realized that they were in his house, and he was waiting for somebody else to lead.
And still Graham did. “Archibald would have cracked a joke to diffuse the tension in this room,” he muttered, his voice still loud in the quiet room. “And although I can imagine what sort of joke he would’ve made, I cannot bring myself to make it.”
“Do not trouble yourself, Mr Courtenay,” Lady Samantha said, smiling at him. She wore a dress of pale butter yellow, and a necklace of topaz adorned her throat. Her finger and thumb kept reaching for the largest jewel in the centre. “I can imagine it myself. He always did that: entered a room and told a joke. He always got everybody laughing.”
“Did he make you laugh, Lady Samantha?” Ernest asked, unable to help himself. Some engagements were not always as happy as they seemed, but Lady Samantha’s face darkened with grief as she nodded. Still, she mustered another smile.
“Every moment we were together,” she told him. “He never failed to brighten my day.”
“That is exactly how we both see him.” Graham nodded. “However, I do not mean to change the topic, but I am curious as to how you ended up in Little Harkwell, Lady Samantha. Lord Bannerdown is not one for guests.”
“I am as surprised as he is,” she answered, sharing a glance at Ernest. “I am very grateful for the invitation from Lady Katherine, but I do not really understand why now.”
Because she believes your mourning period should be over, and I should court you, Ernest thought bitterly. But he did not say it. He would not distress her more than she already was.
“I am sorry that I did not reach out sooner,” Graham said, linking his fingers together and clasping his hand on his knee. “When we returned from battle, I mean.”
“Please do not be,” she said, shaking her head, but there was still a heavy sadness to her that a mere shake would not take away. “I admit that life has been … difficult since the viscount’sdeath, but I am surrounded by good friends and my aunt. It is good to have that when one’s security suddenly falls away. The viscount, however, was not just security for me. Despite our age difference, I truly believe I was falling in love with him. I was …” Her breath hitched. “I was looking forward to our life together.”
Ernest wanted to move to her and comfort her, but he kept his distance. Grief was an unpassable berth. But when he had talked to Miss Gundry the night before in his study, trying not to take too much notice of how her face softened considerably in the candlelight, he had wished for closeness. However, he wished for closeness always from Miss Gundry, for she had consumed his thoughts.
I can only hope my mother’s poison does not find its way into Miss Gundry’s ears. It would be like her to talk of false stories to distance Miss Gundry from me.
But would his mother be so callous?
“I have enjoyed reading your letters, Mr Courtenay,” she said, ever so politely. “And yours too, Lord Bannerdown. Your correspondence has been a bright light for me in these months. You both share fantastic stories of the viscount. Through them, you have painted a picture of a man I never got a chance to know. A man I should have known. And despite my grief, they have made me happy.”
