Page 47 of A Maid's Fateful Courtship
For Josephine, there was no holding it in any longer and she broke down in uncontrollable sobs.
“What a fool I have been, believing his words of love,” she managed to say between her light sobs.
Lettie leaned in to take her friend in her arms, thankful that they were in the corridor and out of sight.
“I knew it would break you,” Lettie said. "But I do not know how to ease your pain."
“It was going to happen sooner or later,” Josephine groaned into Lettie’s supportive shoulder. “I have been in denial to ever think things could be otherwise. But this does not seem right, Lettie,” she said, managing to lower her voice and lift her head. “It does not sound like Ethan at all. Tell me what happened?”
Lettie stood back as Josephine watched her, waiting for her to relay the dreaded gossip.
“The story is a bit mixed up,” Lettie began. Josephine could see that she did not want to tell her, but she needed to hear it. “Some are saying that they were laying on the floor together. But do not listen to that tale because others say there was some sort of accident that caused it. Somehow, they fell to the floor, but no one can explain how it happened.”
“Oh, my word!” Josephine called out.
“Do not you see, though, they fell by accident,” Lettie tried to explain. "That has to be something positive, does it not? I mean, they were not on the floor together on purpose. Oh, and it was her brother who walked into the library and found them.”
“What do you believe happened, Lettie?” Josephine asked for she knew she could trust her friend to be sensible in her assumptions.
“There are conflicting stories,” Lettie replied. “One steward heard that Lord Ethan had passed a book to Lady Matilda. And used that as an excuse to take hold of her hand. That version set off gossip that she might have tried to pull her hand away and that is what caused them to fall to the ground. I do not know if I am honest. There seems to be no real explanation that sounds like the truth.”
“So, the part about them being found together on the floor, is that true?” Josephine asked, willing that part to be mere gossip.
“I am sure that part be true,” Lettie confirmed. “How Lord Ethan has explained himself we cannot know. But everyone seems to be hearing about them getting married as soon as the church banns have gone through.”
Josephine could listen no more. Her throat felt constricted, and her head pounded as she panicked at how she to lose Ethan.
"Lettie, I must go lay down or I am sure I shall faint," Josephine said, holding her stomach tightly.
"I should come with you, Josephine, you do not look well.”
"No. I need to be alone, but please let my maids know that we will continue tomorrow."
Lettie nodded her head, but Josephine could see that she was confused. There was nothing she could do, she had to get away. Once alone in her room, she buried her face in a pillow and wept.
All is lost! I cannot stay here. I cannot bear to see my love in the arms of another.
Josephine did not move from her room. She did go down for dinner, and she did not return to Lettie to put her mind at ease. She tried to sleep but had a long restless night, often waking up in tears. By the morning she felt weak and fevered. The next time she opened her eyes, Lettie was seated by her side, stroking damp hair from her face.
“Shhh,” Lettie’s soft voice came to her. “The doctor says you must rest.”
“Doctor? Why?” Josephine asked, but her vision was fading.
“You have a fever and the marquess sent for a doctor whilst you slept. You are to stay in your bed, Josephine. I will keep looking in on you.”
Lettie’s voice faded and soon Josephine's eyes shut again as she entered a dark, dark place of abject misery.
Chapter 38
“You are not happy, Ethan, are you?” his sister asked him, as she watched him pacing around the small parlour that they were in. “Would it help to talk about whatever it is vexing you so?”
“It has only been three days since I asked for Matilda’s hand in marriage, yet it feels like a lifetime,” Ethan remarked. He did not look his sister’s way but instead stared out of the window lost in his thoughts.
“Father seems to believe that you were waiting with Lady Matilda in the library that day, to inform him of your love for her,” Lady Cynthia implied. “Yet you do not seem happy, why is that?”
He had not admitted to anyone yet, what his reason had been for his meeting with his father that day. Instead of confessing his love for Josephine, everyone believed he wanted to confess his love for Lady Matilda. It was twisting his insides at how Josephine must be taking the news of his pending marriage.
“Have you seen Josephine of late?” Ethan asked his sister.
