Page 17 of A Dreamy Match Made in Heaven
“Thank you,” Sophia replied. “I suppose I did need that reminder. I fear that I have just been through so much that I often forget the strength that I could have if I truly fought for it.”
“Then stop forgetting. Fight for it. You are in control of how you respond to these matters, are you not? Don’t hand over your life to society. Today you are going to speak with a matchmaker about finding love. I wish for you to truly fall in love with the man you are meant to spend your life with.
“Not simply because it is what society expects from you. But because it is what you want and it is what you deserve,” Adrianna added.
Sophia nodded. Her eyes had begun to mist over, thinking about the freedom of falling in love because it was her choice rather than it being an expectation. But she had no time to cry just now. They had to be off to Miss Wainwright’s quickly.
“We had best go!” she exclaimed, grinning as much as she was able.
With all the courage she could muster, Sophia led the way.
Chapter 8
Thomas was pacing back and forth in the room. It had always been a nervous habit of his, walking to ease his mind. It was as if the orderliness of his feet could order his mind.
His mother had always told him from childhood that he was better off sitting and relaxing, but he had never quite managed to do that. Nevertheless, Lady Sophia had picked up on his mother’s comments. In childhood she would tease him about it, tell him that he was one day going to walk himself right off a cliff.
It had always made him laugh and when he laughed she would gaze at him with the most serene look, as if she were watching something beautiful happen before her. Generally, that always caused him to blush and quieten down. He would grow shy under her watch and it was a reminder of how important her eyes were to him. Those deep, beautiful brown orbs.
It had been an eventful couple of days. From arriving in London and securing an inn for himself and Officer Kingsley, to visiting his family’s estate for lunch just outside the city the previous day, Thomas wished that he could have more time to simply get back into the routine of things rather than having to immediately go on this terrifying mission.
But he had made this decision when he thought it was wise, and only now was he living with the regret of that.
He felt as though he would give just about anything to take back the choice he had made. He wanted to pretend that none of this existed. That there was no Matchmaker with a perfect record, and that he was happy and content to never marry.
“You cannot cancel the appointment. She is expecting you,” Officer Kingsley reminded him.
There was a warning in his friend’s eyes, something to remind him that he could not back out of this now. It was too late. He had committed. And it was Officer Kingsley who had made all of the arrangements. He didn’t want his own name to be associated with a man who canceled at the very last moment when he had committed to something.
“I understand that, but this was a mistake. I was a fool for believing that I could do this. Why would I proceed with this sort of arrangement? I do not wish for it. I have no desire to be matched with any young woman,” he said.
“So you are simply going to abandon what you had agreed to be a good plan? You are going to go back on your word?” his friend asked.
Thomas closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath.
“I didn’t say that. I simply don’t know if I can do this. Need I remind you that I haven’t the best fortune with love? Do you not think that I would move forward if I believed that love could still exist for me?” Thomas asked.
“It does. I’ve no doubt of it. Love is out there and you shall find it. The only way that you are going to move on from Lady Sophia is upon finding your new love. And she shall be out there. You shall find her,” he answered.
“But it has always failed for me in the past,” he reiterated.
Officer Kingsley sighed in irritation.
“You behave as though you have been rejected by scores of women. If you recall, there has been only one. One woman who has rejected you, and it was done foolishly. If you are incapable of accepting that, I can hardly blame her for moving on,” he added rudely.
Thomas looked at his friend in shock at such a callous statement.
“Do not look at me that way. When I speak kindly to you, you refute me. Perhaps if I point out that you are being nonsensical, that you are acting the part of a fool, you might be willing to listen. My compliments are not being heard so allow me to try an insult,” he reasoned.
Thomas shook his head, accepting it for what it was. He knew that he ought not to be surprised at that sort of statement. After all, Officer Kingsley was a very different man than he was.
A man of the world, a man who enjoyed the pleasures of life and cared very little for living by a series of rules, he could be brash and rude at times. And he scarcely felt bad for it.
But Thomas knew that he never wanted to be that sort. He wanted only to be the kind of man that showed care and responsibility for others.
Until he had the opportunity to do that for a wife, he would have to bestow his kindness on people like Officer Kingsley and his own family.
He did, however, admire Officer Kingsley’s tendency toward humour, even if it was of a more sarcastic nature. It seemed like such a long time ago that Thomas had been known for his own humour.
