Page 45 of The Precious Secret of a Loving Governess
Even as he said it to his daughter, he tried to convince himself. She was a good woman, and she would make a good addition. He simply had to learn to care for her when it was difficult for him to believe that he could ever love her.
But love was not the important issue here and he reminded himself of that once more, pushing away all other thoughts.
“But why am I not to have a say in the woman whom you choose? If you are marrying someone in order to give me a mother, can I not decide who she is? Do you love Lady Ingles?” Marian pressed.
“Marian,” he said in a tone of warning. “You are too young for this discussion. We ought not to be speaking of the matter. The fact is, I have a fiancée and you shall do well to respect her. I have no desire to see you behave poorly towards her, and I wish that you would see that she is the best choice,” he said, although he no longer felt that he meant it.
“But why can you not marry someone like Miss Jamison?” Marian asked again.
Reginald gazed ahead at the woman who rode before them. He considered her, thought about all that he had seen in her up until that moment, her dignity and wisdom and the depth of her care for Marian.
“Because there is no woman like Miss Jamison…” he replied slowly and deliberately.
The realisation of it settled in his gut and he wondered why he had not seen it earlier. But it was too late for him now. He was committed elsewhere and Miss Jamison was not an option deemed appropriate by society.
But he could not ignore the truth of it. There was no other woman like Miss Jamison. He had seen it long before this; perhaps even from the moment she set foot in his estate. But it was something he had been forced to push aside and ignore. He had hired her for one purpose and he had chosen another woman for a different purpose.
His daughter would have an excellent governess and a suitable mother. He would have a wife that England would expect for him and everything would settle as it ought to. His happiness might not be the matter in question, but Reginald could accept that. So long as Marian had a mother, he could accept anything.
Chapter 21
Arriving back at the estate, Victoria was surprised to see a carriage before the great manor. She looked back at the Earl and Marian behind her, and saw in the Earl’s eyes that he recognised what it meant.
She wondered who it could be, something he evidently knew already.
They led the horses to the stable and began the short walk to the double doors at the entrance of the house where Miss Franklin made way for them to enter, telling the Earl that his betrothed was present.
Lady Ingles. Of course.
The morning had been such a delight and things had been ideal, so it was little wonder that now of all times the woman would show up at the estate and make herself present. Victoria tried to maintain a smile and be polite as Lady Ingles came from the drawing room to greet them.
It was strange, Victoria considered. Should not the Earl have been led to the drawing room to meet his guest? Why would she come out and see all of them like this? It was unusual and caused Victoria to feel uncomfortable, as if she was on display where she should not have been, standing beside the Earl.
But instantly, the Earl of Hanover turned all of his attention to Lady Ingles, greeting her politely and with a great deal of grace and pleasantry. Victoria watched, trying to ignore the agony she felt inside as he entertained the woman and interacted with her.
But Lady Ingles turned quickly to Victoria, making a show of taking her hands and greeting her as well. The warmth of the greeting was not lost on Victoria and she sensed how easily Lady Ingles sought to firm a bond between the two of them.
“Miss Jamison, it is such a pleasure to see you again. You look terrific and I am thrilled to be here when there are no others surrounding us, taking away our attentions,” Lady Ingles commented.
For a moment Victoria thought that Lady Ingles was making an open remark regarding Mr. Smith, but then she quickly came to realise that the beautiful woman was referring rather to the party and the crowd that had been there. She smiled in reply and curtseyed, gently pulling her hand away.
“It is wonderful to see you again as well, Lady Ingles,” she replied in a formal manner.
Victoria did not wish to appear cold as it might give the Earl cause for concern or suspicion. But she also did not wish to bow to every whim of Lady Ingles and come across with the apparently obvious behaviour of a woman willing to cave to anyone’s wish.
The conversation she had just had with the Earl only reminded her of the consequences of her promise. She had confessed to him what lie she told on behalf of her father and now she was face to face with another unfaithful person for whom she was lying.
If only she could tell him the truth, if only the Earl knew that Lady Ingles was untrue. But it was not the time to share that secret. She wondered when it ever might be and felt certain that the truth would have to come from his betrothed.
The sincerity in Lady Ingles’ smile only drew Victoria in further. It was genuine and warm and the sort that showed her true gratitude. No one could see that smile and believe that Lady Ingles had lied when she had promised Victoria that she would not be unfaithful again, that it had been a terrible mistake that would nevermore occur.
But alas, Victoria felt a deep sense of loss when she noted how the Earl catered to his betrothed. Only half an hour previous to this, he had been open with her and shared the depths of what was in his mind. How was it that now she could see him being so free with another woman?
Victoria knew that he was behaving correctly. She knew that he was doing what society would expect of him and what was moral. He was being faithful to the woman to whom he was betrothed. But he had been so tender and sweet with Victoria that she could scarcely let it go.
The confusion overwhelmed her. She wished to be anywhere but present with the two of them in that moment.
“To what do we owe the honour of your visit?” the Earl asked Lady Ingles.
