Page 36 of The Precious Secret of a Loving Governess
“Miss Marian, I ask that you would listen to me. First, tell me, did your father give you a reason?” Victoria asked.
Marian shook her head rapidly. “No, he never does,” she complained.
“Well, I have learned that your father is rather intelligent and he has reasons for all of his decisions. We must not question that. So I do suggest that when he says no to something, you try to understand that he has reasoning for it,” she said.
“But-”
“There are no rebuttals. Your father has the final say on these matters. I may go to him at your request, but you have to respect that if he tells me you may not ride, there is good reason for it,” Victoria said.
“But how am I to trust that there is a good reason if he never tells me his reasons when he refuses?” Marian asked.
Victoria understood the unfairness of the situation and agreed that it would be best if the Earl would explain his thoughts to his daughter that she might know why he was refusing her. But as it was, he tended to remain private on all matters.
“I know that it seems unfair. I know you are clever and wish to have answers for everything, but there are two things I might say to you and you shall not like either of them,” Victoria began.
“Oh bother, what are they?” Marian asked in dread.
“The first thing I must tell you is that you have to be obedient to your father regardless. You may not know his reasonings, you may not understand them. He may never explain himself to you about anything at all, but still you must listen and obey. That is the way of things and it is so for a reason,” she said.
“I dislike it, but I know you must say that since you work for him,” Marian acknowledged and Victoria nodded.
“Yes, well, I also know that it often went that way with my own father in regards to my studies and things I wished for,” she added.
“Alright then, and you said there was a second fact I would not like?” Marian asked.
“Yes, indeed. The second thing is one which women in England must live with every day. And that is the knowledge that we are always subject to the whims and fancies of others. Should they allow us a treat, we take it. But should they refuse us something we greatly desire, we must accept that as well,” Victoria explained.
Marian’s eyebrows drew together in confusion.
“You mean we may not have the world at our fingertips with study?” she asked.
Victoria sensed the same recognition of betrayal in Marian’s eyes that she had often felt in her own. The bribery of study, they idea that being an intelligent woman of great means came with a certain level of freedom, it was all a blend of true and false.
“You have the world at your fingertips, Miss Marian. But only a small world. The grander world is decided by men and we females are subject to it. Today it is horses, but tomorrow it could be another thing entirely,” Victoria began.
“Do not lose heart, however. Your father may not budge of the matter of riding, but he is a good man and I do believe that you are fortunate. He has your best interests at heart. He is not seeking to have power over you; he is seeking to keep you safe. And that is a very good thing for a father to do,” she concluded.
“But I want to ride,” Marian continued.
“I know. And I promise you that I shall petition your father on your behalf. But whatever choice he makes, we must respect it, do you agree?” she prodded.
Marian looked as if she would rather push back even more, but finally nodded in concession of the decision.
“Very well. I shall discuss with him later today about the option of your riding. Until then, we have French to work on and you must prove yourself competent with that before we move on to horses,” Victoria said.
The rest of the lesson was spent with a great deal of correcting pronunciation as Marian still often spoke lazily when she tried to use her French. Although she had shown improvement, there was still a great way to go.
Victoria was anxious about having to speak with the Earl about his daughter’s request to ride. She knew that it could mean bringing up a painful past for him. But despite that, she also felt a deep sense of excitement.
There was something about the moments she was able to spend with the Earl that always reached her soul. She loved to be around him, even for the briefest of periods. He had remained kind to her and she found him to be charming even with his quiet nature.
He was rather handsome, a thought which she often tried to push away but could not quite ignore. Victoria wondered if Lady Ingles had noted his beauty. Certainly he was far more handsome than Mr. Smith.
But it didn’t matter anymore. Lady Ingles and the Earl were betrothed regardless of her opinions and Mr. Smith would have to move on to another woman, preferably one who was not committed to another already. And until that happened, Victoria would sit by and watch as the Earl sacrificed his happiness for the sake of his daughter.
Chapter 17
Reginald stood at the window with his eyes gazing out over the land beyond his estate. There was a marvelous view and he loved to watch as the sun set in the distance, the wash of colours creeping closer and closer with every breath.
