Page 23 of The Precious Secret of a Loving Governess
She had to ignore everything that had occurred on the previous night.
That thought shook her and Victoria blinked herself into a new focus with the child. She knew that she could be strong and get Marian to listen if she just held her ground, no matter how difficult it might be.
Despite Marian’s behaviour, no matter how rebellious she was, it was evident that the child had a clever mind. She was bright and witty, strategic and clever. And while those aspects of her character had been the reason for her poor reputation in the home, Victoria couldn’t help but admire the tenacity with which she spoke.
Her strategy was going to be slow to progress, but Victoria felt confident that it would work eventually. And as the day moved on, she was right. By matching Marian’s wit, she was able to consistently trap her in her own arguments.
More than that, it was the fact that she had been recognising that Marian was intelligent in her attitude rather than simply badly behaved.
By the end of the day, Marian had memorised the entire passage that they had worked on. From there, she had done well in her piano lesson and also with French. Each lesson had been a struggle, but Victoria had devised whatever necessary to push through.
That evening, Victoria had gone down to dinner and passed by the Earl. He had nodded to her politely and inquired how she was.
“Very well, my lord, and you?” she greeted in reply.
“I am well, thank you. Are you on to dinner?” he asked.
“Indeed, my lord. I expect you have eaten?” she continued, making conversation that interested neither of them but was expected nevertheless.
“Certainly, I have. With my daughter, of course. She was rather tame this evening, tired even. You must have kept her busy today,” he said.
“I tried my best,” she smiled.
“I am glad to hear it. Enjoy your evening,” he said, taking his leave in a way that seemed somewhat strange and nervous.
Victoria watched him go as subtly as she could.
Enjoying dinner with the rest of the staff, she was trying to make herself feel at home as best as she was able. There were so many things about living at the estate that had been an adjustment for her and Victoria found these times to be a bit of peace amidst everything else that was happening.
That evening, she sat in her room and tried to sort her thoughts. From the day she had arrived at the Earl’s home, Victoria had been overwhelmed by events. From learning about Marian’s behaviour and the ways her grief had impacted her to keeping the secret of Lady Ingles and knowing that she could be the one to ease Marian’s loss, it had been quite a lot.
She breathed deeply, closing her eyes to the world and attempting to push past the racing of her heart. There was a weight on her and Victoria wanted to see it lifted. Knowing that there was only so much that she could control, she weaved through each thought that was pressing on her mind.
Marian is improving, but it shall take time. I can be patient with that, I can have compassion for her,she thought.
Lady Ingles made a mistake, but haven’t many a man and woman done the same? She assured me that it shall not happen again and she is good for Marian.
The Earl seems to be a good man. He has been kind to me. He is handsome, although that cannot matter to me. He is my employer and a well-respected man. He has chosen not to judge me for my father’s actions.
Once she had thought through each thing, the weight slowly lifted. Victoria could control so little, but she was certainly able to accept that there was so little of it in her own power.
She went to bed that evening and rested well, waking in the morning with a newfound sense of peace.
That day, Marian was seeking new ways in which she might be able to distract from her lessons. With a renewed sense of vigour and determination, Victoria smiled and continued on in the lessons.
“Marian, I must ask you to pay attention. If you can finish this page, I shall give you a five minute time to rest and play,” she encouraged.
Marian looked at her with suspicion.
“You never allow me to play,” she complained.
“I allow you to play far too often, but as it is, I am hoping that you shall understand that it is a reward. You have done well this morning, but this still must be completed. Once you have finished your task, I should like to see you enjoy yourself,” Victoria remarked.
Marian seemed to be considering it, as if she could not allow herself to give in too quickly. But Victoria knew that the child’s mind was already made up. She would be obedient. She would finish the work and do what she had been asked.
Once she had completed the task, Victoria did as promised and allowed her five minutes to play.
“Alright, my dear, the time has come for us to resume,” Victoria told her when the five minutes had come to an end.
