Page 30 of A Bride for the Icy Duke
“How do you both know what she’s meaning and I don’t?” Lydia complained.
“That’s because, darling, you are married in name only,” Marie said, patting her arm gently. “No matter. Tell me, did you look down?”
“Down?”
“At his breeches, dearest.”
Lydia’s face flamed a deeper red. “Of course not! Why would I look at that?”
“Because then you would have an idea of howexcitedor not he was at having you in his arms. But you can always try it next time.”
“It would help me if I knew what I was looking for!” Lydia said, feeling as though the conversation had taken a detour through a rather impassable forest. “What am I supposed to be seeing?”
Marie lowered her voice and leaned in. “If he is aroused, there will be a bulge below his hips,” she murmured. “Men have an…organthat hardens when they are excited, and it is this that—if you are intimate—”
“We arenotintimate,” Lydia whispered hurriedly. “And I have no intention of being so.”
Eliza pursed her lips, but her mother called her, and she glanced over her shoulder distractedly. “Drat. I must go. Mama wishes me to greet our guests with Samuel.”
Lydia and Marie watched her go. “How likely is it, do you think, that Eliza is in love with him?” Lydia asked idly.
“Oh, almost certain. And I believe she will marry him, too, if I have anything to say on the matter.” Marie cast a long look at Lydia. “Andyou—I know you have no intention of being intimate with him, but speaking as a woman with experience, there are few things that take such a direct path to a man’s heart. If you want him to fall in love with you, you could do worse than seducing him.”
Lydia took her time thinking through her answer. True, she wanted to remain in the house, and thus for him to remain as her husband. And if, to do that, she needed her husband to love her, then perhaps it was worth consideration, but…
“If he loves me, will he not want to spend time with me?” she groused. “I would rather we lived separate lives.”
“Now, you would.” Marie accepted a crystal glass from a passing footman and sipped the wine inside. “But believe me, if you engage his heart and—well, darling, his manhood—then perhaps you might feel differently about the situation.”
“Do you really think me so weak as to fall in love with the man who abandoned me for a year?” Lydia demanded.
“Not love, precisely, no.” Marie considered her words, lowering her voice still further, though there was no one nearby enough to hear. “But there is somethingcompellingabout pleasure. And let me tell you now, there is nothing shameful about a lady’s enjoyment of such things with her husband.”
“I think I know rather more about your marriage than I wished to,” Lydia said dryly.
“It is the first and fastest way to a man’s heart, in my experience,” Marie nodded, taking Lydia’s arm and leading her through to the dining room. Eliza and Mr. Godwin were ahead, Eliza staring into his face as she said something, her expression animated. “And it comes with certain…perks. Believe me, Lydia.”
“Well,yourhusband might be good atthat, but—”
“So teach him,” Marie said, her face perfectly serious. “Learn the things you like, and teach him. If he is a good man, he will listen and follow your instructions.”
“How am I to know what I like?” Lydia squeaked.
“With your hands, of course.” Marie patted her arm sympathetically. “I know the entire concept feels alien and wrong, but I think if you attempt it, you will understand.”
“I—” Lydia had no words left to convey her shock. That she, a woman who attended church every Sunday, might alsotouch herself,seemed like a sin too far.
And yet, as the dinner continued, she could not stop thinking about Marie’s expression—the contentment within her eyes, her conviction—and her own desire to remain in York. If seducing her husband was her best ticket to achieving that, then she would not quail at the last moment.
After all, being in his lap had been a largely pleasant experience.
Perhaps being intimate with him—even a kiss; after all, that was on her list—would not be so unpleasant. And they were married. As she had concluded, this was her last chance to experience these things if she was to go back to a solitary life.
Whynotgo further?
If the worst-case scenario was that he remained unmoved and intended to ship her away regardless, she would have lost nothing but gained experience.
That wasn’t so bad, was it? That wasn’t wrong. That wasn’t sinful.
