Page 77 of Wicked Devotion
“Hey, that’s a good thing,” Ruby says, nudging her foot with mine. “It’s like riding a rollercoaster. You just need to shut your head off and enjoy it.”
“The shutting my head off partisthe problem.”
“I already figured. I’d tell you to stop worrying so much, but I know it’s easier said than done.”
In the warm glow of the sinking sun, my doubts come creeping back. Mochi notices my discomfort because she lies down on my legs like a drooling emotional support blanket.
Ruby is telling me about her and Sam’s wedding in Vegaswhen the words just start to fall out of me before I can stop them.
“I think there’s something wrong with me.”
Ruby looks at me with furrowed brows. “No one is that much of a lightweight, Lily. I barely put any wine in your drink.”
“No, not like this,” I say with a sigh, scratching the head of a no longer drooling but now snoring Mochi.
“I mean the situation with Logan and Max. Isn’t it—I don’t know, greedy? You are not supposed to be with more than one person. You can’t have feelings for two people at the same time.”
“Who says that?”
“Everyone?”
“Mhm, and look how happyeveryoneis. Do you have feelings for both of them?”
“Yes,” I mumble, looking at the horizon.
“See, you can have feelings for two people at the same time. First problem solved.”
I wish I could argue with her logic, but Ruby is right.
“Did anyone you’re spending time with give you the impression that what’s going on between you, Max, and Logan is wrong?”
“Apart from Logan?” I joke, and Ruby snorts.
“I don’t know if my words are enough to ease your mind, but there is nothing wrong with wanting them both. It’s your life. You have to be happy with the decisions you make. Well, you and the people affected by your decisions,” she says with a shrug, smiling at me.
“I’m sure Max and Logan aren’t going to complain, though. If it feels right to be with them, then just enjoy it. Life is hard enough as it is, don’t complicate it further by worrying about the opinion of people you shouldn’t give a damn about in the firstplace.”
“Brady called me a whore,” I say.
“Brady can go eat shit.” Ruby gets up, holding her hand out to me. “Fuck that guy. Just between you and me, if I had a husband who treated me like that, he’d have ended up in a few black garbage bags in the Everglades the moment I found out about his lies.”
We walk back to the house, and Ruby squeezes my hand when she notices me gnawing at the inside of my cheek.
“Stop worrying. You deserve to live your life the way you want to, Lily. And if this means letting the guys worship the ground you walk on before and after they rail you into oblivion, then so be it.”
The moment Max sees us, he comes jogging down the stairs.
“They are good men,” Ruby says. “Max has a heart of gold. Honestly, it’s so big I’m surprised it fits inside his body. He would pick the stars out of the sky for you, self-made spaceship and all that. And I know Logan isn’t the easiest to deal with, but I see how he looks at you. He would kill for you and Max, even if he has a hard time saying it.”
“Logan would kill to skip the line at the post office,” Max says upon joining us. He wraps his arms around me, and I struggle to free myself while he peppers kisses all over my face.
“Thank you,” I tell Ruby. “For everything.”
“Anytime,” she says, shaking her head with a laugh when Max picks me up to carry me up the stairs.
28
MAX
