Page 71 of Wicked Devotion
“And what if I told you I lied, Lily? Would it change a single thing?”
“Yes?!”
“Fine. I lied to you. I never planned to let you go. From the moment I saw you, I knew you were supposed to be ours. I just had to wait until you two would catch up and realize that I’m right.”
“Who gave you the right—“ I trip over my own words, struggling to find an outlet for my frustration. “I am tired of being lied to. I’m tired of being a pawn in someone's game. I deserve to decide for myself, for fuck’s sake,” I yell at Max, who just cradles my face and silences me with a kiss.
“Stop yelling. We don’t do that. We can talk about everything, but we don’t yell at each other. Logan being a part of this relationship doesn’t mean we have to start acting like him.”
“I don’t think Logan would be too happy about you using the wordrelationshipin this context.”
“That’s cause Logan doesn’t know what’s good for him. And to get back to your other complaint, you do get to decide for yourself,” Max whispers, smiling against my lips. “You can choose if you want to share a bed with me or with Logan, for example.”
“So, did I get this right? I’m yours and Logan’s captive, and you’re not planning on letting me go in the near future?”
Max wipes away tears I hadn’t noticed falling.
“Not even in the far future, baby.Never. I’m going to find you in every lifetime.”
“That sounded like a threat.”
“Good.” Max laughs and pulls me down with him until we’re sitting in the sand, my back resting against his chest.
“A terrible fate, don’t you think? Being stuck with me and Logan for eternity,” he whispers in my ear, and his breathtickles me so badly I have to chuckle despite wanting to stay angry.
“Do you want to tell me what’s really bothering you? I mean, apart from Logan acting like an asshole.”
I think back to Charlie’s words, and then I just start talking. I tell Max what happened when he and Logan were gone and about the things Brady had said and done to me.
“I’m going to kill him when we’re back at base. Gonna cut his fucking hands off and shove them so deep down his throat—“
I cough, and Max scratches his head before he looks at me. “Sorry, I’ll keep the violent fantasies inside next time. And before I forget—“ he pulls out his phone and opens his banking app. “How much money did he take from your dad?”
“No. To all three suggestions. You weren’t the one who took it. If anything, it’s my responsibility to pay it back. How would I even explain this? Oh, hi Dad, Brady and I are no longer together because he’s apparently a criminal; sorry you had to find out like this, but one of my new boyfriends wants to pay his debt for him. How we met? Well, he and his friend kind of abducted me…”
Behind me, Max bursts out laughing. “We should work on our story before you take us to meet our parents.”
“Oh, I’m in no rush,” I mumble. This one time, I am thankful for Logan fighting against calling this a relationship because I’m not looking forward to my mom’s reaction.
As the light turns golden and Max and I lie down next to each other in the sand, I decide against telling him that hislove youwas the cause for my little breakdown.
Instead, I let out years of frustration about my goddamn marriage until I’m once again sobbing. Not just because of Brady, but also because I can’t understand my feelings for Logan. I am so scared of accepting them, knowing Logan will probably never reciprocate them.
Brady would have stopped me after five minutes, but Max just listens. He holds my hand and runs back to the house to get me paper towels, but not once does he invalidate my feelings. He doesn’t argue with me, doesn’t explain how I ‘just got it wrong’.
He’s just there for me, and maybe being stuck with them for eternity really isn’t that bad, as long as Max is there to pick up the pieces of me Logan leaves behind.
26
LOGAN
Iknow Lily cried. ThatImade her cry.
While tears that fall because of overwhelming pleasure make my heart beat faster, Lily’s cause an entirely different reaction. There aren’t a lot of things I cannot bear to see, and apparently, the effect my words and actions had on Lily is among them. I’m afraid the same would apply to Max if he wasn’t so good at hiding his emotions.
When she and Max come back inside, Lily meets my gaze. Her amber irises are tainted with hurt, but the warmth in them won’t disappear. Like it’s telling me that no matter what I do, she won’t stop trying.
She will never understand. I was wrong when I thought she’s like Max, because she is worse.
