Page 29 of Sever
Chapter Fourteen
2009
The First Heartbreak
As I throw all of the things I actually care about in my suitcase, I half expect my mother to come barging in the door. She has been arguing with me for weeks about leaving with Ryder after graduation and even grounded me, thinking that cutting me off from him would make me not want to be with him anymore.
Today is the day, though. Today I will start living for me.
Ryder found an apartment near school for us. He’s going to get a job and I’ll get one on campus to help with the expense. We’ll finally be able to share our lives together without hiding. He said he’d be here at noon today and we can pick up the key to our apartment at four.
I’m so happy I could skip around my room.
The door opens and my mother stands there.
“You can’t stop me leaving.” I look away from her and continue to pack.
She comes to sit on my bed. “I’ve realized over the last few weeks that I can't change your mind. I just wish you would reconsider.” She shakes her head. “We’re your family, Megan. You belong here with us. Your father, your siblings, we’ll all miss you.”
“Please don’t. You'll miss me taking care of the kids, Mother, that’s all.”
I glare at her, hating how she’s treated me more like a caregiver than a daughter. I didn't have a normal high school life, and she and my father are the reason for that. Never once did they try and lift a finger to help. They took the checks while I did the work.
Well, no more.
Her chin lifts and her nose crinkles, like she’s just smelled something bad. I knew the “we love you” attitude wouldn’t last long. It never does. “If that’s what you think. I hope that this boy is the solution you think he is.”
“He isn’t asolution. I love him.” I zip up my suitcase. “You and Dad never understood that.”
I take my bags and place them in the hall before walking to the boys’ room. Joey and Timmy are playing Xbox, but when I walk in, they pause the game and scramble to their feet. Joey doesn't really grasp the fact that I’ll be gone. I think he’s thinking that it’ll be like when I go to school. Timmy knows exactly what’s happening and he’s been giving me the silent treatment because of it.
“Miss you, Meggie.” Joey gives me a tight hug and tears start to well in my eyes. I’ll miss the kids more than I’ll miss my parents. I raised them. Watched them grow from babies, to toddlers, to children, to now being well on their way to becoming good men. That is, if my parents don’t mess them up like they did me.
Timmy looks at me, betrayal shining clear in his eyes. “I can’t believe you’re just leaving us.”
I cross the room, moving to him and wrapping him up in a hug, trying to put everything I’m feeling, but probably won’t ever be able to put into words, into this one small gesture. “Bud, I will come and visit. I promise. I’m going to be in school, maybe you could even visit me one weekend?” I pull back just in time to see his eyes light up.
“Love you.”
“Love you, too, Tim.” I ruffle his hair and then walk out of the room and head to see Hannah.
She understands even less than Joey. When I open her door she runs to me and gives me a big hug. Her hair is still in the plaits I put it in yesterday and her clothes are stained with remnants of breakfast. My chest seizes as I try not to think about what might happen without me here to watch over here. I crouch down, placing a kiss on her forehead. “I’m gonna miss you, Hannah banana.”
I grab my bags and go sit on the porch. It’s cool out, so I pull my sleeves down over my hands, not wanting to go inside in case I miss him. I hear the door open and out of the corner of my eye I see my father, just standing there. I didn’t even say good-bye to him. He’s been colder to me this past month than my mother has.
“I’d say I’ll call, but you and Mother are holding my phone hostage.” I don’t bother to look at him. I don’t need to. I remember the look of distain on his face. He’s worn it pretty much every time he’s looked at me for the longest while. He doesn't reply and seconds later, I hear the door shut.
I glance down at my watch. In ten minutes Ryder will be here and I can finally be happy.
Not having him around this past year has been hard. We’ve spent hours on the phone, but nothing is the same as having him with me. When he left, my parents threatened to call the cops if he came back. I refused to put him in any danger and I decided that we would just have to wait to be with each other.
My eyes focus on the end of the street, on the turn where Ryder will come from any minute now.
Glancing down at my watch again I see that an hour has passed. Maybe he hit traffic or stopped at a store.
He’s coming.
Another hour.
