Page 50 of Clash
Nodding, I let out a long sigh. “He was buying flowers for his fiancée. They just found out she’s pregnant. You know, no man has ever bought me flowers before.”
“Really?” Karen’s surprise was almost comical. How do you explain to someone that you’ve only been with one man, and the Devil doesn’t buy flowers?
“Yeah… it really wasn’t my ex’s thing.” And it wasn’t.Flowers were for pretty girls… not ugly hags like me.Shaking his petrifying voice out of my head, I stuffed down the memory, determined to forget both Eric and Clash for good.
But I couldn’t forget about Clash. He was just here, staring at me with knowing eyes, but all the disappointment in the world. It had been three months since he last saw me, and guessing by his advances toward me last time, I’d venture to guess he was already fucking some other girl. Not that we did anything other than kiss, but like Karen said, you could tell just by looking at Clash, he was a fucking beast in the sheets.
Just the thought of him ravaging me like that had every part of me on edge and tingling. It had been far too long since I’d last been with a man, and now I was fantasizing about the jerk who lost all my money.
I definitely needed to wake the fuck up. I’m romanticizing about another man who deserved to be behind bars.
My shift at the flower shop ended around six. Karen trusted me enough to lock the place up for her, after she had to leave early to take care of her husband. It wasn’t that big of a responsibility, but I treated it like I would die if I messed it up somehow.
Large hands fit around my waist as I pulled the key from the door and the sexiest puffs of heated breath curled around my ear.
The thunderous pounding of my heart raced when he turned me around in his arms, his adorable nose touching mine as he pressed his forehead against me and grinned.
“So, did ya miss me, sweetheart?”
18
For three long months, I searched for this beautiful woman, thinking the worst, but also anticipating I’d never be able to give back her money. This whole time she was right under my nose, working in a flower shop only a few miles away from the clubhouse. I didn’t spend her money. Fuck that. I had the money stashed at my place, ready to give it back to her when the time was right. Somehow, my heart always knew I’d be staring into her concrete eyes again, getting lost in those hues of gray that haunt my memories as well as my nightmares—envisioning a future I’ll probably never have.
After the accident, and our piggy coverup, the club turned to shambles again. It was all Shasta’s fault, her return had pissed off the sweet butts, who were only making things worse instead of better. Half of my brothers were fed up with it, cursing the woman who tore us all apart. Shasta had messed us all up, and now she was the Prez’s fiancée, Snyder popping the question not long after finding out they were having a baby together, leaving the rest of us with fucked up memories of how she once belonged to us all.
Not that I wanted her like that anymore, but the rejection tasted the same—nasty and like poison.
Wasp, Sandman, and Priest had it the worst. I could see my brothers still looking at her with hearts in their eyes, but unlike Sabbath, they all respected Snyder, keeping their distance from his Ol’ Lady, like they should. Part of me wanted to test the waters, see if I could get her to cave into me, just for the hell of it. But when I found out she was expecting, seeing the hope and love in both of their eyes, my vengeance was severed, revenge just didn’t sound fun anymore.
So, I’m letting them have their fun—living in this fantasy world while the rest of us suppress our rage.
Shit, my nerves were already shot upon entering the flower shop, a little bitter and jealous that our so-called Prez and his beautiful fiancée get to live all happily ever after and shit when the rest of us are getting our dicks swabbed by sweet butt leftovers.
The funny thing about leftovers… they lose their flavor after a while, and my tastebuds drastically changed after I planted a kiss on Gina’s sweet lips. I haven’t touched another woman since, my dick becoming a strange, glorified rod of celibate leprosy. I fucking hated being celibate, but I couldn’t even look at another female now without thinking about Gina.
I wanted her acceptance just as much as I wanted her in my bed. The sad part was, I needed her to fall for me the same way I did her… in a breathless instant, with no provocation and all reckless abandon.
But Gina’s hatred had only grown since the last time I saw her, a fact that was immediately understood by the warm sting her slap left me with. She shoved me violently away, taking a step back to protect herself.
“Don’t fucking touch me!”
“Gina, please, let me explain…”
Her beautiful eyebrows arched menacingly as she took another step back, putting even more of a painful distance between the two of us.
The pad of my thumbs twitched, aching to trace the angry lines of her face and wash away the single tear that trickled its way over the apple of her cheek and disappeared into the corner of her quivering mouth.
“Explain what, Clash? How you fucked up my life in one fucking week? How you forced me to stay here, even though all I wanted was to get to my sister in Vegas? How your stupidity led to me finding an under the table job, and mooching off the hospitality of a lonely old woman, all because you get some kind of sick, demented pleasure out of fucking with cops. You almost got my son taken away from me, Clash. Don’t you understand what could’ve happened if that cop had run my ID that day? Alex would be gone, I’d be behind bars for kidnapping, and you’d just go back to your fucked up single life, fucking your way through whatever hoe is stupid enough to open her legs for you. Just leave me and my son alone. We don’t need you! We never fucking did.”
That was a lot to take in.
There was an expectation in her eyes, a wish for me to turn around and leave her be, but I just couldn’t do it. Not when every part of me craved every part of her. I’d never felt so drawn to a woman before, and I needed to know why the pull had me trailing her like a hungry moth, desperate for the warmth of a porch light on a cool summer evening.
“Will you just fucking listen to me!” The rise in my voice had her eyes widening, and that stupid fear was back in them, believing the worst in me again.
Why couldn’t she just trust me?
“What’s there to listen to,Chuck?Remember, you don’t even know me.”
