Page 48 of Clash
Sighing, I stared out the window, watching the landscape whoosh on by, trying to figure out what I could say without saying anything. I didn’t want the club to know about Gina and Alex. I just wanted to keep them both to myself, if I ever find them again that is.
“Let’s just say, he took something that didn’t belong to him and I pilfered it back.”
“Could you be a little more specific?” Snyder prodded.
“Nope, that’s all you get.”
Snyder sighed. “What’s gotten into you, Clash. Ever since I took over as Prez, you’ve been a fucking asshole to me. I get it. You wanted this spot, but you can’t fucking hate me for it if everyone else felt like I was the better fit.”
“Watch me,” I snipped, immediately looking back out the window. But something was nagging me, and I couldn’t help myself, I just had to stir the pot more. “She was supposed to belong to all of us,” I whispered. “We had all agreed on it.”
“It wasn’t what Shasta wanted, Clash. Why can’t you respect that? It’s not like you gave a fuck about her. Caring about someone other than yourself just isn’t your kind of thing.”
He was wrong. I do care about someone else—two people actually, but he wasn’t going to know that—nobody would.
“Respect her wishes.”
“Like you did?” I snap. “She literally left the club, asking for no one to follow her. And what did you do? You fucking followed her like a lost little puppy, dragging her back here like a giant bone you’re ready to bury and hoard all to yourself. She snaps, and you’re by her side. Face it, Snydie, you’re whipped. She’s got you wrapped around her finger and you don’t even seem to bat an eye.”
“It’s because I love her, Clash. She means everything to me. If you ever fall in love with someone like I have, you’ll understand exactly what I’m feeling. But we both know that won’t be any time soon.”
This time he was wrong.
I fell hard and fast, something I never do, for a woman who crawled out from behind a dumpster and straight into my heart. It was beautifully complicated, and I still was doing my best to understand it all.
“Well, good. Like I said before. I’ll respect your relationship, Snyder, but it doesn’t mean I have to like it.”
“I guess not,” Snyder said with a frown. “I just don’t want us to be at odds anymore. I need you Clash. I need your support.”
Silence filled the car, poor Zeppelin looked so out of place and like he wanted to be anywhere but here.
“Don’t you see? Without you, this club will fall apart. I may be the glue that holds it together, but you’re the strength that keeps us strong,the foundation if you will. I need you by my side, Brother, not fighting me like I’m your enemy.”
More silence.
I wasn’t sure what to say. I knew I was being an asshole, the man did save my life, but I was still pissed off over everything that happened. He abandoned us—leaving us in our time of need.
Snyder let out another frustrated sigh, turning in his seat while throwing his hands up. “Fine, be an asshole. See if I care.”
As we pulled behind the hospital, my mother already waiting for us to arrive, I found myself sitting in a puddle of my own guilt. Despite all the bitterness and resentment, I felt towards him, Snyder was right about one thing, the club did need us both to work together in order to keep us strong. If we kept at each other’s throats, it would just keep us in a vicious cycle—a rift that continued to ripple and tear us apart.
Zeppelin exited the car, walking over to my mother who looked frightened and worried all at the same time.
Snyder reached for the handle on the door, anger shucking off him in waves. But before he exited the car I whispered, “Thanks, Brother, for saving my life.”
He paused, a tiny smile toying with his lips.
“You’d do the same for me.”
And the sad part was, I would. Despite everything happening, I’d kill for him, and any other brother that wore the Lewd Outlaws’ cut.
The number one rule of being an Outlaw… Always put your brothers first above everything else. It was just our way of life.
17
Two months later
I never expected for Bessie’s offer to stay with her to last as long as it has. The woman was an absolute godsend, and I couldn’t thank her enough for helping me and Alex the way she had. With her help, she found me a job at a local flower shop, helping her good friend Karen around the shop. I’d gotten pretty good at making bouquets, and Karen was so impressed that she was practically begging for me to stay, offering me a job as head florist.
