Page 63 of Light As A Feather
Taking a sip of my coffee, I buy myself a bit of time to figure out how to answer that question. “Well, we were just friends at the time.”
“Mmm,” Jayden mutters under his breath. The interruption distracts me for a number of reasons.
“If I need extra context, I’ll let you know,” Hale cuts him what can only be described as a ‘what-the-fuck look’ before waving me on to continue.
“Things were really bad for me at home. My mom and stepdad fought constantly and loudly. It was a lot, too much, if I’m being honest. I spent most days out of the house and a lot of nights. Hawthorne was kind enough to let me crash here that summer, and it kind of just became the norm. It was really just a safe place to lay my head down and get some decent sleep, which, as I’m sure you can imagine, isn’t really possible when people are screaming and breaking things at all hours. Anyways…” Drinking my coffee, I try to dispel some of the unwanted emotion rising in my voice. “That’s a trip down memory lane I don’t want to take.”
Her eyes turn somber, but thankfully, she doesn’t try to comfort me. “So, you started spending most of your nights here. When did things go from platonic to romantic between you two?”
“Is that really relevant?” I hate the defensiveness in my voice, but I can feel Jayden’s eyes burning into me. The accusation is irritating when he’s the one who ended things with Hawthorne long before we ever got together.
“Hawthorne says that the entity is jealous. I can’t be sure yet, but I’d assume that’s played a major role in this attachment andhow it developed.” She meets my eyes as she takes a drink. “I’m not here to judge you, I’m just trying to establish a timeline.”
“Things really shifted after Halloween of that year. But as far as officially together, a few months after that.”
Hale writes something down. “And when did you start seeing the entity?”
“Probably a few weeks into staying the night. It’s complicated though…” I tap my fingers against the wooden tabletop, trying to figure out how to best explain it. “He didn’t just appear. It’s like I felt him before I saw him. And even when I first started seeing him, it wasn’t as what he is now.”
“When you first started to become aware of him, what did it feel like?”
It’s been so many years, that in part, it all feels like a distant memory much of the time but sometimes, it’s as if it could have been yesterday. “Like I was being watched. Back then, I didn’t realize that it was him or what was happening. Many things lurk in the dark, but you learn not to pay too much attention. But looking back, I’m so familiar with the sensation—the unease, the heaviness that clings to me like restraints—that it’s obvious that’s what it was—him. At first, I was just a little more on edge, sometimes a bit paranoid, especially walking through the forest at night, but it wasn’t anything too intense. But over time, the sensation became more and more intense, sometimes even overbearing.”
Hale’s hand moves across the page, scribbling notes a mile a minute. “In the forest? So he was able to follow you outside of the house even before you left for good?”
“Yes. But the only times I felt or saw him outside of the house, at least back then, were when I was pretty close. He never followed me home or that far out.” Using my thumb, I rub away a drip that streams down the side of my cup.
“Can you describe how he first appeared to you? Hawthorne says he’s an interactive personality ghost, and he looks just like any other person, but I’m curious if he appears the same to you, given his condition.”
“Yeah, I’d say so. Now, at least.” She raises her brow, encouraging me to continue. “When I first started sensing his presence, it was just a feeling, just something in the air. At least I think so. For a while, he appeared more like a shadow—humanoid, but I couldn’t make out his distinct features, just the general shape of his stature. The eyes, though, those were distinct.”
“When did he start appearing to you as a human?”
“That night.”
“What night?”
“She means the night Hawthorne died.” Jayden cuts in. “The night she ruined his life.”
“Dash, what the hell? That’s not fair,” Hale chastises.
“No, he’s right.” I keep my eyes averted from him as I try to process the war of emotions colliding within me.
“He isn’t,” she argues.
“It doesn’t matter. Like I was saying, that night, when we were playing light as a feather, he came to me when it was my turn. There was no denying it was him, even though he’d never presented to me that way.”
“Probably had to do with the veil being thinner. Not to mention, games like light as a feather, that connect us to the spirit realm, make it easier for us to access them, but the same is true for them. Sounds like he seized his opportunity.”
“How is it possible that he would go from being…what he was to what he is now? That’s something I never really understood.”
“I think I can answer that, but first I want us to take a walk around the house, and you tell me where you feel his presence most.”
I stand and nod, desperate to get out from under the lens of Jayden’s camera that’s recording all of my vulnerabilities. As soon as we leave the kitchen, it’s like I can take a full breath again.
When we stroll through the living room, we walk into a hushed conversation between Hawthorne and Mendez. All I want is for everyone to leave so I can crawl into his lap and sit in silence for a while, but that’s not an option, so I continue through the room with nothing of note to tell Hale. As I round the corner, Thorne catches my eye and gives me a reassuring smile.
“Nothing?” Hale asks, recapturing my attention as she follows me up.
