Page 8 of Queen Takes Sunfires 1
He reached out and took my hand in his, surprising me. I jerked slightly before I could conceal my instinctual reaction. He immediately released me, but the mask of calm control I'd been wearing had definitely slipped.
I didn't like to be touched. At all. Even by doctors who were supposedly trying to help me. "Is it serious?" I asked hoarsely.
"You're pregnant, Karmen."
A strange whirling sound filled my head. Buzzing. White noise. Static. "Pregnant? You don't even think I'm human."
"I know, it sounds crazy even to me. There are things I can't explain in your blood, but there are also commonalities. We could measure your hemoglobin and white-blood cells. They tested for narcotics, cholesterol—yours is nonexistent, by the way—and hormones. When a woman of your age comes into the ER, it's standard procedure to run a pregnancy test before we administer any drugs that could harm a fetus. Although your blood is definitely abnormal with elements we couldn't identify at all, I'm fairly certain that you're pregnant. We can do an ultrasound to be sure, depending on how far along you are."
I couldn't seem to think. Everything felt distant and soft, as if I was fading away. Or maybe the world was fading away, and I was going back to that place of brutal light. A place of pain, and evidently...
Shards pierced my head, making me wince. I closed my eyes, holding still. I didn't want to remember. I had a feeling that it would be very bad. The haunting memory of pain was bad enough. I knew, with grim certainty, that I didn't want to pull those shattered pieces back together into a clear image of what had happened to me. Who I had been with. Who might be the father of this child.
My stomach convulsed and I gagged, but there wasn't anything in my stomach to come up.
"I'm so sorry," the young doctor whispered urgently. I heard rustling cloth. Hurried movements. Low voices. A woman, I thought. The nurse. A cool cloth pressed to my forehead and it felt incredible, soothing the boiling acid threatening to consume me.
"A drink might help." Her voice was cheerful despite the circumstances. I felt something pressed to my lips, so I opened my mouth enough to sip cool, sweet water. Something so small and insignificant, but so precious. I drank and I could almost feel the cells in my body swelling and plumping with fluid, relieved to have something, anything. Where had I been that even water seemed like a miracle?
Hell, I'd said. Close, but not the right word. Not the right name. My brain felt tender, swollen, and hot, as if those shards had actually caused injury inside my skull.
"Do you know who the father is?" The doctor asked gently.
I flinched again. Shook my head. Hard. I couldn't think of that. At all. Liquid fire, molten gold, pain. Such agony.
"Let's order a rape kit. I'll notify the officer who brought her in so he can start an investigation."
"No," I whispered. "It won't help."
"We need to test you now while there could still be evidence," the nurse said in that chipper voice. "Time is of the essence in these cases."
I forced my eyes open. She smiled at me, probably in an attempt to be kind and encouraging, but it only pissed me off. "You have no idea what I've been through."
"Sadly, we see these cases all the time. I assure you, honey, this is for the best."
Rage stirred inside me. I hated her tone. I hated being calledhoney. She didn't know me. She didn't know anything. None of them did.
You're not human, a voice whispered in my head.They'll never understand.
I reached out and took the cup of water from the nurse. A wrinkle formed between her eyes, but she didn't take it away from me. I drained the entire cup in a few swallows. So good. I instantly felt better. More awake. More myself. Whoever that was. "More, please."
"We need to run more tests," the doctor said. "Drinking too much isn't a good idea right now. We might need to perform surgery."
I shook my head. "I'm fine. You said yourself I'm improving rapidly. Where is this place again?"
"Chicago." When I stared at the doctor blankly, he asked, "Do you know what year it is?"
Years were meaningless where I'd been. Eternity was all that mattered.
"Do you know how old you are? How long you were... held?"
My jaw flexed, the memories threatening to bubble back up and break apart like knives in my head. I forced them down, determined to wait until I was stronger. Safer. Before examining them fully. "How old do you think I am?"
His head tipped slightly. "Thirty or so, I would guess. Maybe thirty-five."
I didn't know much about where I'd been or who I was, but I knew thirty years was only a drop in the ocean. I had been existing for... Carefully, I let the olive tree return to my mind. A laughing child climbing a tree. Me. Strawberry blonde hair loose about my shoulders. A short dress of heavy material. Darker than the olives. It took me a moment for the color to register. Emerald green. Once my favorite color. I wasn't supposed to be climbing the trees. Someone was coming to see us. Someone important. I wanted to see her arrive. So I'd climbed the tree on the hill to get a better look...
I turned my head as the child and watched a line of horses coming up the winding road. Four white horses pulled a carriage with riders before and after guarding the way.
