Page 34 of Bring Me Back
My hands shake as I grip the Glock 22, making sure the magazine is full and there’s one in the chamber before tucking it into the back of my jeans and standing. Looking at myself in the mirror, I wonder how I got here. I could never have imagined this is where my life would lead at 14, the last time I saw my parents, before the course of my life was altered forever. I’m determined to end this bullshit ride with Cooper, one way or another. Taking a deep breath, I pull my hair into a ponytail and square my shoulders. This ends tonight.
Opening the bathroom door, I stop short when I see Rory standing in the hall just feet away from me, clutching her son to her chest. Her mouth hangs open slightly, and a single tear rolls down her cheek. I know she heard more than enough of that conversation, and I can’t imagine how it sounded, but I don’t have time to waste.
“Rory, I have to go. Please don’t say anything. I have to do this.” I beg, whispering desperately.
“You absolutely cannot do this, Willow. He will kill you! Have we all learned nothing from the ridiculous amount of danger we’ve all put ourselves in over the years?! You can’t go by yourself! You have to let us help you!” She whisper-yells back to me, bouncing slightly to avoid waking Silas.
“Listen to me, Rory. He had pictures of us, all of us. Of your children, Aurora. He will kill them, I don’t doubt that for a second. Think of your husband! Look at your son. Please! Can you put him at risk that way? I can’t. I won’t do it. I love you all too much.” Pleading with her to understand as I back away towards the front door, I know what I have to do, but they will hate me for this. Jaxon may hate me for this, too. But I will never stop protecting him. Not until we are truly safe.
I take advantage of her momentary distraction as Silas squirms in her arms, and I sprint full force to the front door. I grab her keys off the hook next to the door as she screams to the guys behind me, but before theycan stop me, I slam my hand on the front security panel and initiate the emergency lockdown sequence for the house. The doors and windows seal magnetically, only able to be opened after a full security check. I know that will buy me at least the few minutes I need to get out of here and on the road. Something like betrayal burrows into my gut, but I shove it down. There’s no time for emotions right now.
I climb into Rory’s Bronco, knowing it’s the only thing here with enough speed and power to get me where I need to go as quickly as possible. Tearing down the driveway, gravel flying behind the truck, tears burn my eyes. I wipe them away as quickly as they return. The iron gate at the exit is closing quickly, but I don’t hesitate. Pushing the gas to the floor, I break through the gate. The metal on metal screeches loudly around me as the gate flies off the track. Beckett will make sure that gets fixed. I know he will. Because he’s a good man.
He’s a good man, and I’m leaving him behind. I know without a doubt this is a mistake, but I don’t see any other choice that doesn’t lead to putting the people I love in danger. One way or another, the nightmare I’ve been so desperate to escape will end tonight. And I know if something should happen to me, this family will always protect my son.
I’m determined to be the one who makes it out of here alive tonight. Cooper doesn’t know me anymore, doesn’t know how hard I’ve worked to make sure I’mnever a victim again. I want to be there to watch my son grow into the incredible man he’s already becoming. I want to see him go to art school and set this world on fire with all his big, beautiful dreams. My motivation feels so much more worthwhile than Cooper’s. He’s only ever been fueled by hatred. For me and even more for himself.
I program the GPS to the location he gave me, knowing my friends will have the ability to track this truck, but I can only hope to end this as quickly as possible before they catch up to me. My phone rings in the passenger seat, another trackable device, but I can’t answer it. Beckett’s perfect face lights up the screen, but I already know what I’ll hear on the other end, and it will devastate me. The ringing stops after a few seconds only to start up again. My ringtone and the sound of my quiet sobs fill the small space. Regret slithers around my heart, squeezing like a viper, poisoning my mind against this decision even though it’s too late.
“Please forgive me. Please, please, please.” I chant to the empty truck, letting my thoughts free into the universe.
My phone starts ringing again, and this time the face on the screen cracks my chest wide open. My perfect boy, his smiling face looking at the camera. I can’t take the idea of something happening to me and never hearing his voice again. I slide to answer the call, putting it on speaker and staying silent.
“Mama, please. Don’t do this to me.” His voice is so fragile, sounding so much like the little boy I stole away from the devil all those years ago. I can’t listen to both of them begging me to stop, to slow down and change direction. The decision is already made.
twenty-two
“Jax…oh god, Jaxon. I can’t. I can’t put you into the hands of that man. And I can’t let him have even the slightest chance to hurt the people we love. This is my mess, understand? This has always been my mess to clean up, baby. I’m so sorry.” Her voice is watery as she begs through her tears.
I will tear this world apart to get to her. Checking the GPS, it says we’re less than an hour from the warehouse where Rory said they were meeting. I know she has at least a thirty minute head start on us.
“Listen to me, son. I want you to go to art school. I know that’s what you want, and I’ve always wanted you to be exactly who you are. I’m so incredibly proud of the man you’ve become. I couldn’t have asked for a better kid. You are the one amazing thing that made every single ounce of pain in my life worth bearing.” She canbarely speak through the tears, and my heart is aching to take this pain from them both. It didn’t need to be this way.
“Stop! Stop it, Mom. Don’t you fucking dare tell me goodbye. I don’t care what you say, this shit sounds like goodbye, and I won’t hear it. How could you leave me?! How could you fucking leave me here to deal with this shit on my own! We’re supposed to be a team!” He screams, and I feel his heart shattering. He slams a fist into the dash, and the anger inside me mirrors his.
“That’s the problem, honey. I’m the one who is supposed to protect you. Not the other way around. I love you, Jax. I love you more than I ever thought I could possibly be capable of loving anything or anyone. You are the best thing I have ever accomplished in this life.” I agree, it does sound like she’s telling him goodbye.
“Give it to me.” I grab the phone from him, seeing he can’t take any more of this.
“Willow? Where the fuck are you?!” I shout, the anger palpable in my voice.
“I’m so sorry, Beck. I love you. I wish I would’ve told you the first time I felt it. We would’ve had so much more time. I know you’re angry, but please…please take care of our boy. No matter what happens, please don’t leave him without a family,” she begs, and a part of me recognizes how selfish and hypocritical she sounds. But I would never leave him.
“Willow, please. Please, baby-” she cuts me off, disconnecting the call.
“Motherfucking son of a goddamn bitch!” I roar, throwing Jaxon’s phone across the backseat of the Mustang.
We were out of the house and on her trail within 30 minutes of her leaving, but all I’ve got is Breaker’s turn by turn instructions once she’s already made them. She knows where she’s going, and she’ll be there at least a half hour before we are.
So much can happen in half an hour. She could be taken from me in less time than that. Why the fuck would she put herself in so much danger? Why would she do this to Jaxon? I thought I made it more than clear that I would protect them no matter what the consequences were, why couldn’t she just trust me?
“Beck, what if-” Jaxon starts, but I cut him off.
“Don’t. Don’t fucking go there. She’s gonna be fine. We’ll be there before anything happens to her, Jax. And then she can kick my ass in person for bringing you along.” I joke, trying to ease his fears. The fear in his eyes is clear, anxious energy saturating the air around us. We’re both terrified of getting there too late.
“I wish you were my dad,” he says quietly, an arrow piercing straight through my heart. His eyes are fixed on something far away out the window, and he doesn’t elaborate.
“I may not have made you, but I love you, Jax. I willsupport you and your dreams for the rest of my life. I have since the day I first met you, a mad preteen just looking for someone to pick a fight with. You’ve come so fucking far since then, and I’m so proud of you. What is a dad but someone who you know will always have your back? I will always be that for you. Whether or not I have that title, that’s how I see myself.” I speak from my heart, knowing he needs to know I’m always here, no matter what happens tonight.
