Page 12 of Bring Me Back
If Breaker is coming in without getting a tattoo, they’re taking this very seriously. Breaker is responsiblefor all the security at the shop and many other businesses around town.
“I need you to reschedule the few appointments we have scheduled today, Willow. Try to get them in later this week if we have any openings, but we need the shop to be closed today. Megan can head out, too. We shouldn’t need her today.” Eli says, his features hard and tense.
“Yeah. No problem. Did you want me to go too? Once I finish rescheduling, I can get out of the way if you want.” I say, my voice sounding weaker than usual. I don’t want to put distance between myself and my friends. But I understand the need to close ranks when something like this happens.
“Break is coming in to update the security features around the building. He’s gonna install a few cameras inside, just for safety. You’re welcome to stay, Will. I know you’ve been wanting to change out some of the flash sheets in the lobby. Hell, I bet the girls would even help you paint like you’ve been begging me to do for months now.” Ev gives me a soft smile, and my heart warms a few degrees.
They aren’t kicking me out. They don’t think I did this. I am a real part of this family. Tears burn the back of my eyes, but I blink them away. Crying is the last thing I want to do right now in the middle of all this chaos.
It takes about half an hour to get everyone rescheduled.Megan had an attitude when I sent her home, but it is what it is. She talks non-stop about some boyfriend who buys her everything she wants, so I don’t think she’s hurting for money.
Breaker and his wife, Rory, come through the back door with two large duffle bags full of electronics. As soon as she drops the bag, Breaker wraps his arms around his wife and pulls her against his body. I feel like we’re intruding on an intimate moment between the couple, but this is an everyday occurrence. The man is clearly obsessed with her.
Breaker and Rory were quite the scandal when they got together. The fifteen-year age gap, the striking differences in their personalities, and the fact that Rory is Elijah’s little sister all contributed to that for sure. But it didn’t take long for us all to see that they clearly loved each other.
“Alright, alright, break it up,” Elijah says, strolling past the room with a smile.
“I’ll kiss my wife wherever I feel like kissing her, Harding,” Breaker says, smirking at Eli and kissing the side of Rorys head before she heads towards the front where the girls are talking over paint choices.
Silence hangs heavy in the air surrounding Breaker and I. He’s the only person in Grovewood who knows all of my secrets. His stare burns a hole through me, but I can’t meet his eyes. He’s been encouraging me to tell ourfriends the truth for years now, and I just can’t bring myself to do it. I work so hard to keep this life going for Jax and I, I don’t want to risk shattering his world all over again.
“You’ll have to look at me at some point, ya know.” His gruff voice grates across my skin.
“Something wrong, Break?” I ask, choosing avoidance.
“Willow, come on. Look at me.” He demands.
My eyes meet his, and all I see staring back at me is my friend. A friend who told me he would do everything in his power to protect my secrets, no matter what it could’ve cost him. So many people think Breaker is a cold man, but I know that’s simply not true. He cares for his friends so deeply. Most people would never have bothered to help a stranger the way he has helped me.
“You have to tell them. This can’t continue. I know you didn’t take that money, Willow. But if they found out you’ve been keeping a secret like this now? You know how that could look,” he says, and I wrap my arms around my waist.
Deep down, I know he’s right. But fear is a powerful and primal emotion that arises in response to any perceived threat, real or imagined. It's a natural survival mechanism ingrained in our very DNA to protect us from harm. Fear can be so intense and overwhelming. The fear that I could lose nearly everyone I love over my owndeception is a vice wrapped around my throat, keeping the words trapped inside.
“Don’t you trust them, Willow? They love you. They would never abandon you over something like this.” There’s truth in his words as he tries to appeal to my softer side.
“I just…I can’t take the risk, Break. The more they know, the more danger they could be in if he finds me. You know that! I won’t do that to you guys, to your families.” I whisper-yell, pleading for his understanding.
His glare turns cold. I know he doesn’t agree with me, but he would never betray me. Not like I’m betraying all of my friends by lying to them this way.
“I promise you this, Willow. I will not lie to my wife. If she asks me for the truth, I will give it to her, no matter what the consequences may be. You need to end this,” he says, stomping from the room just as Beckett comes through the door.
“Am I interrupting something?” He asks. I’m struggling to hold back my tears. I can’t fall apart right now, especially not in front of Beckett.
“Of course not. What are you doing here? I thought you were going back home,” I lash out, shoving my pent-up emotions back down my throat.
“Everett and I are going to itemize the expenses for the month. Just to be sure nothing was missed. Is that okay with you?” He snaps back, his tone icy.
He’s never spoken to me so rigidly. My firstinstinct is to apologize, to bury my face in his chest and feel the warmth of his arms wrapping around me. But I can’t keep letting those things happen. I can’t tell him no a thousand times and still turn to him to solve every problem I can’t handle. I know how much it hurts every time I shut him out, and I’ve been doing it for years. The last thing I ever wanted to do was cause Beckett an ounce of pain.
I wish he would yell, throw things or scream at me. That’s the kind of reaction I know how to handle. The sting of constant rejection every time he offers me a part of himself will break him someday, and I can’t do that to him.
“I’m sorry. I wish…I wish things could be different. I won’t bother you anymore, Beck.” My heart aches in my chest at the thought of losing the closest friend I have. But I know he may always want things I can never give him, and he deserves to find happiness.
“Don’t. Don’t do that. Thingscanbe different, Willow. Things can be however you want them to be. You’re making the choice to continue like this.” He raises his voice, drawing the attention of our friends. This is definitely not where I thought my day would lead.
“You’re right,” I say softly. “This is my choice. My options are all shitty here, Beck. You have no idea what you’re asking of me. You have no idea how dangerous…”
My voice trails off as tears gather in my eyes. I let them spill over my lashes, not bothering to wipe themaway. I know hundreds more will fall tonight, so why bother?
