Page 12 of Tell Me No
“I’m gonna grab another beer. Anybody else need one?” My eyes scan around the circle, every one of my friends staring at Break and me with a mixture of curiosity and mischief. I step beside his chair, gently placing my palms on his shoulders. His muscles tense under my touch, but he doesn’t look my way. We haven’t discussed what this is, if it’s anything at all. But this feels like a public announcement, just touching him this way. I lean forward, bending down until my lips are barely grazing his ear. I see his hands grip the edge of the weathered Adirondack chair. “Don’t worry, I’ll grab you another one…daddy.”
Before I can turn to walk away, his hand whips out to grab my waist and I shriek as he moves so fucking quickly, pulling me onto his lap. His long fingers dig into my hips, causing a delicious heat to shoot through my body. If it wasn’t a public announcement before, it sure as shit is now.
“Don't worry, princess. Iris will get it for you, won’t you?” He says, adjusting my body so I’m sitting sideways across his legs. Casually draping one arm across my knees, he wraps the other arm around my back and rests it against my hip, cradling me in his arms.
He gestures for Iris to get up. All eyes are locked on us, tangled in this position. Kelsea sports a smug grin and I fold my lips into my mouth to keep from literally laughing out loud. Iris nods, standing and walking to the cooler as the conversation continues casually around us, as if my world didn’t just shift on its axis.
Within seconds, I’m absentmindedly threading my fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck. He leans into my touch, maybe on purpose or maybe unconsciously. Either way, I don’t care. He wants to be near me as much as I want to be near him. For the first time in years, that feeling isn’t terrifying to me. It doesn’t feel uncomfortable to me at all for him to touch me, which shocks me.
I haven’t been touched by a man in three years without feeling instant anxiety, like my skin is fucking crawling. But with Breaker, the feeling of his thumb rubbing gently back and forth across my thigh is actually so soothing. He tilts my body into his so slightly, bringing his mouth close to my ear. The heat from his deep, even breathing fans across my face and I lean into him.
“Aurora?” He whispers in my ear, goosebumps sprouting across the column of my neck.
“Mhmm?” I flick my eyes to his, the deep green of his gaze clouded in a beautiful grey storm of desire.
“The next time you call me that, I’m gonna fill that beautiful mouth of yours so full you’re choking on me. And when you’re clawing at me, begging me to give you a breath, give you a break, I want you to think about the warning I’m giving you now, understand me?” He says, his grip on my thigh clenching tighter and tighter as fire flares through my veins.
Before I can stop it, an anxious laugh bubbles out of my throat. “You promise?” I say, much louder than I intend to.
He scoffs, laughing lightly as he shakes his head at my response. “You are the fucking devil in a beautiful disguise,” he says with a smile.
The next few hours fly by so comfortably, I almost forget why I hate celebrating. Almost. I’m coming back from the bathroom when Ember stops me right before I sit back down with the group.
“Hey, I wanted to make sure I gave this to you before we’re all too drunk to remember why we’re here,” she says with a lopsided grin. Something tells me she’s already halfway there.
“You didn’t have to get me anything, Emby. This party was more than enough,” I tell her with a grateful smile. I’m happy I got to spend tonight with my family.
“I know, but your brother insisted. He’s been planning this for weeks,” she says, looking over her shoulder at her husband with a lovesick expression. They are, without a doubt, the most disgustingly adorable couple I've ever seen. And I couldn’t be happier for my big brother.
“Awwww, what a big softie.” Smiling, I take the envelope Ember holds out to me.
“Don’t tell anybody, you’ll ruin his reputation,” she laughs as we both sit back in the circle.
I drop down into my own chair next to Breaker’s and he shoots me an annoyed look. How dare I sit anywhere else but in his lap? Sliding my finger under the seal, I pull the folded paper from the envelope. Reading over the information printed on it, I feel my body heat, my stomach dropping all the way to the ground. A year long membership to a professional studio in Charleston. Under different circumstances, I would be over the fucking moon about a gift like this. But I haven’t stepped foot into a dance studio since my attack.
The blood drains from my face, and I try my best to hide it. Tears well up in my eyes and I blink them away. Clearing my throat, I try my best to dislodge the lump growing there. Memories from that night flood my mind, playing over and over, burning like acid in the crevices of my mind. I close my eyes tightly, doing all I can to ground myself, to bring myself back to the present.
Breaker’s fingers brush against my wrist and I flinch, slamming back to the reality of this moment. Every single one of my friends is staring at me like I've grown another head while I try not to dissociate from reality. He quirks an eyebrow at me and I shake my head lightly, plastering on the fakest smile I can before standing to hug Ember.
“Thank you guys so much! I love it,” I tell her, and she relaxes into my embrace. I look down at my brother and he’s not buying it.
“You like it?” He asks cautiously.
“Of course, bubba. I love it!” I reply, using the nickname I've called him since I was old enough to talk. He melts at the endearment, just like I knew he would. Pulling me into a huge bear hug, he squeezes me so tightly I have to hold my breath.
“I’m so glad. I know you haven’t had much of a chance to dance since you left home, but I hope you can now. I hope you can find your way back to yourself, bug. I’ll do whatever I can to help you,” he says, holding me longer than he ever has.
“Thank you, Eli. So, so much.” I place a small kiss on his cheek and smile. I could never tell him the truth. It would crush him, shatter him beyond repair.
He pulls me in again, whispering where only I can hear, “I know something is wrong, bug. Something is haunting you. I wish you would let me in, let me help you. But I know you know I'm always here. So whenever you’re ready, I’ll be waiting.” I give him a tight small, pulling out of his arms.
“I got you a gift too, sweetness,” Iris pipes up and I swing my gaze to him.
“Oh, really?” I ask, cocking my hip and raising an eyebrow at his playful expression.
“Oh yeah. I got you all the sweet, sweet love my heart could possibly hold, Ror. And it’s all for you,” he says, jumping out of his chair and kneeling before me. I burst out laughing at his ridiculous actions. He’s always such a fucking clown, but I love that about him.
Before I can reply, I feel familiar heat against my back. I fold my lips into my mouth, smirking down at Iris as his eyes go wide. He holds his hands up in surrender, inching backwards on his knees like he's being held up as a hostage. The entire exchange is hilarious, and I hear Everett suppressing a laugh behind us.
