Page 88 of Barbed Wire Fences
“Okay, well I have something to tell you, and I wanted you to be one of the first to know…” she says, her voice softening.
“What’s going on? Are the kids okay?”
“Yes, they’re fine but I’m not. I’m pregnant.”
“Oh my gosh, that’s amazing! Congratulations!”
“I don’t know what we’re going to do. The vasectomy was supposed to prevent this. Four kids, Jael! Who has four kids anymore? It’s expensive enough to feed one.”
“I’m sorry,” I chuckle. “I know that must be tough, but you and Lark are solid.”
She huffs out a breath. “Yeah.”
“Didn’t Rhett mention he’s trying to expand his business, with Lark stepping into a management role? Hopefully, that means a pay increase for him too?”
“Yeah, but it’s still overwhelming. These kids drive me up the wall. I need a break. Hey, speaking of needing a break, what areyou doing tonight? Want to come over for dinner and drinks? Non-alcoholic for me now, sadly. We have a sitter.”
“I’d love to. Wait,” I freeze next to my car in the middle of the lot. “How do you know that I’m back in town?”
“You can try to stay away, but Whitewood Creek always pulls you back in, Jael. Well, that and old man Clarence saw you at the hospital today.”
Of course, it was Clarence, the hospital’s security guard and our old high school’s police officer. He’d always had a soft spot toward me. Said I reminded him of his daughter who passed away in a car accident as a teenager. I’d been happy to get to know him too during that time when any father figure for me was nonexistent and I was desperate for approval.
“What time should I come over?”
“Come by as soon as you can. I’ll be here, wallowing in self-pity.”
I rush back to the motel, stripping down for a quick shower before slipping into a loose green dress and sandals. September's here now, still warm during the day but cooling off at night, making the evening air feel just right.
Driving to Lainey and Lark’s, I tap my hand on the steering wheel, oddly calm, even though the ticking clock in the back of my mind reminds me that Rhett’s bound to realize I’m back in town soon now that Lainey knows.
I could call him again, maybe shoot off another text and hope for a reply, but I’m done with that. I want to see him face-to-face, look him in the eyes, and finally tell him how much he means to me, how much he always has. I’m ready to lay it all out on the line, even if it means getting hurt all over again.
But my moment of ease is short-lived. Because as soon as I pull up to their house, I spot something that makes my heart freeze: Rhett’s truck parked right in the driveway.
What the hell?Is this some kind of set-up?
I take a deep breath in and let it out slowly, killing the engine of my car before slowly making my way to their front door.
The last time I was here was the night that Rhett and I fought and I ran. I want to be brave. I don’t want to run again. I want to be strong the way that Rhett thinks I am. I want to tell him how I feel and hope like hell he feels the same way.
Each step feels heavier, like my chance to come up with something to say is slipping through my fingers. I’ve replayed this moment in my mind for four weeks straight, but now that I’m being faced with it, I’m not sure I’m ready.
Before I can even knock, Lainey swings the door open and pulls me into a hug. As I return it, my eyes catch sight of Rhett behind her, walking through the living room with a bottle of wine in one hand and whiskey in the other. When our gazes lock, his brow furrows, and his lips press into a thin line.
“What the hell is she doing here?” he growls.
Chapter 30 – Jael
My cheeks burn hot and tears sting at the corners of my eyes under his harsh tone. I don’t even know what I did wrong, why he’s looking at me like that, why his anger feels like a storm I just walked into without an umbrella.
I called, texted, and left voicemails trying to explain why I had to leave. He ignored them all.
What was I thinking, imagining a world where he wanted to see me again? Where we could pick up the pieces and not bleed all over them.
I had it all wrong, didn’t I? I’m not the woman men choose for the long haul. I’m not the one they fight for once I’m gone. I’m just a detour, a stop along the way to someone better, safer.
Or maybe it’s simpler than that. Maybe the pain I caused Rhett when I ignored his calls and messages all those years ago runs too deep to ever scrape out. Maybe I don’t get to be forgiven for ghosting him years ago. And I know I shouldn’t blame him for feeling that way…but standing here now, with his anger pinning me in place, I feel small and raw and at the very end of my rope.
