Page 122 of Your Coffin or Mine
“So, Talbot says my package will be delivered tomorrow. Which is insane,” Bernadette says, placing the popcorn on the table.
“Their shipping is always on point,” I say, refusing to acknowledge how Frank Stein has ruined me for Talbot forever. Even the reading app makes me nauseous.
I squint as she shoves her bright-as-fuck phone in my face to show me something.
My brows come together when I see wooden spikes with tiny crosses on them that look like something out of a B-rated vampire movie. “You bought stakes?”
“Umm duh,” she says, taking her phone back. “And the holy water is on the way.”
“Holy water doesn’t work. Not on vampires, at least.”
She perks up at this, her expression excited. “So hedidtell you something about vampires?”
“First of all, no one is staking Vlad.” I roll my eyes. “And secondly, we aren’t talking about this.”
She turns to face me, setting her phone down as she does, and folds her legs under herself. “Why can’t I stake him? Unless it’s something silly, like, I don’t know, you’re in love with him?”
My stomach flips and tingles go up my spine. “What?”
“Seriously? I have had to hear about every dude on earth you have ever had so much as a crush on. Do you remember Dan Klinksy from science class in third grade?”
The question throws me. I try to think back, remembering a cute boy with braces, and bright photos of the zoo where we shared an ice cream once on a school trip. “I forgot about him, but I remember the scrapbook is purple.”
“Yeah, but that’s not important. What is important is you made a scrapbook on what your life would look like for everydude you’ve ever had a lady boner over, and I have had to hear about each and every one, except for this one.”
And you never will.Trying to explain Hilda will solidly get people discussing straitjackets and psych wards, which is a total no for me. There won’t be a scrapbook for this one. Ever.
“Yeah, so?”
“So, hello?! You said he’s a vampire, Aubrey, and I, as a good friend, have decided to believe you. I’ve been half worried he fucked with your memories, or some weird superpower happened and that’s why you’re not talking.” Her green eyes shimmer with tears behind her blue-rimmed glasses, and her bottom lip quivers. “Did he brainwash you?” she breathes.
I’m scaring my own friend. My arms go around her as I pull her into me. “Burnie, I’m fine. He didn’t hurt me at all.”
“Good. I was getting ready to make it my life’s mission to become Buffy two-point-oh,” she says shakily, before grabbing a tissue.
I just don’t like how my chest aches as I remember the things Vlad said. What if it was all a lie, anyway? Wouldn’t it be just my luck to fall for well-played lines again? I mean, his mate? What a joke, right?
I curl into myself, wrapping the blanket around me comfortingly. Vlad’s social accounts have been completely silent, and there is no way to reach him with how Frank wiped Vlad’s existence from my phone. I have been checking that profile constantly, equally terrified and hopeful that he messages, too afraid to message him myself. He hasn’t, and that just hurts more.
To top of this entire disaster, I am constantly praying Frank Stein doesn’t find out Burnie hacked into his company. I have no idea what he would do, and I donotwant to find out.
“Whatever you did that night, Vlad’s hotel became an overnight sensation. George is still there partying, by the looksof it,” Burnie says, frowning down at her phone. “Connor O’Doyle—he is super hot, by the way—says the castle is all booked and there are no openings at this time. At least that’s what I found on the new castle website page,” she says, shrugging.
“Connor?” My nose wrinkles. “Wait, is there a photo? Let me see.”
She holds the phone up to my face, and sure enough, Doyle is there, listed in the directory for all to see.Is his name actually Connor?I guess it’s not that surprising Vlad would call him something different.
I knew George was still in the castle because I messaged him as soon as I got a new phone replacement and number. He thanked me for saving Fifi and filled me in on how Vlad and Doyle are both missing. No one has seen either of them, not even the new castle manager knows anything.
I look up to see Burnie staring at the television with a strange look on her face.
A news channel is broadcasting a grand opening for Frank Stein’s new medical facility, and there are phrases in the captions likesustainability measures, andthe importance of human life. I quickly grab the remote in a panic and change channels.
“The way I would fuck that man,” Burnie says, shaking her head at the TV. “I know he’s hiding something, even if he does pour money into charities.” She turns to look at me and frowns. “Why do you look like you’ve seen a ghost?”
“You would fuck Frank Stein?” I ask, shivers running up my spine at her words.
She wiggles her brows. “He has that whole broody villain vibe.”
