His mind returned to Annika. He had fought it, tried desperately not to dwell on her beautiful face, the way she had hurtled away, hurt by him.
“Your Czar charm won’t fool me.”
A smile crept across his face, unbidden. She was honest, their conversation free, every moment with her easy.
Their lovemaking had been wild and passionate, unrestrained. He had never experienced anything like her.
Was he really willing to walk away from all of that?
“You are a Czar,” Éduard said heavily, “or you should be, which is what matters. But right now here you are, in exile with a fellow exiled royal, in another country where you cannot be appreciated.”
Maxim’s heart softened. It was all very well for him to complain. He had a throne to go back to. His family, albeit distant, was still on the throne of Russia.
Éduard’s would never be going back to France.
“Yet you had the chance for something real, something that you could actually experience whether you were a Czar or not,” continued Éduard. “You had happiness in your grasp, and I say again, you were an idiot to lose it.”
“I-I, the idiot!” Maxim spluttered, his veins heated by the brandy. “I am no fool!”
“Yes, you are,” Éduard said calmly, placing his glass down and staring seriously at his friend. “After all this time you have spent looking for a throne, why not become the king of your own castle?”
Maxim stared. “Castle? The Marshes have no castle.”
Shaking his head and laughing, Éduard said, “No, ‘tis an English expression. To be king of your castle. To build a home.Mon Dieu, you had the chance to build a real life, not one in the clouds. Was it really worth throwing away for a little misunderstanding about medals?”
CHAPTER 12
Anne leaned back.“Well, I cannot eat another bite. Can you, Meredith?”
Meredith’s eyes were a little glazed over, a sure fire sign that she had overeaten. “Pardon?”
Sir Thomas chuckled as he looked at his girls. “Well, I have to admit, I am impressed by the fare the kitchens here have been able to provide. You never know, when away from home, whether the quality will be precisely what you are expecting.”
Anne placed a hand on her stomach. She had certainly eaten more than she had expected, but then, what was the point in attempting to remain slender? No gentleman would be calling on her any time soon, and with that disappeared any incentive.
Maxim had loved her body. No, Anne corrected herself silently, wincing at the very thought of him. Maxim had made love to her body. He had no real interest in her. As soon as he discovered the truth about her, the one secret she had, he had made it perfectly clear that he could not consider her as a bride.
“You really believed, after hurling accusations at me and revealing your own…history – you thought we could just ignore today and get married tomorrow?”
“Right then,” said her father, cutting through into her thoughts. “If we go now, we should be in time to see the royal family arrive.”
Anne sighed heavily. “May I stay here, in our rooms, Father? I am not feeling up to company today.”
Sir Thomas frowned. “We have to go, Annika. My goodness, ‘tis Christmas!”
Anne winced. That little pet name, once so beloved by her when only her father had used it, was spoiled now. Maxim had ruined it for her.
Meredith looked between them and then said loyally, “I do not wish to go either, Papa.”
Anne smiled, despite herself. Perhaps now that the truth was out in the open between them, they would become even closer. Perhaps there was joy to be found in this situation, even if her heart was breaking.
“Of course you do,” she said gently. “Do you not want to see the decorations, the candles, and the royal family?”
Her daughter squirmed in her seat. “There…there is a boy that I was hoping to see there.”
Anne looked over her head and mouthed ‘boy’ to her father. Sir Thomas shrugged and shook his head with a sigh.
“Well, if you wish to meet your gentleman friend, we will need to go,” he said aloud. “Come now, Meredith. Go and choose a piece of jewellery from your sister’s things, you deserve a treat this Christmas. And change into your court clothes, while you are there.”