Page 72 of Happily Never After
‘Pretty much exactly what you’ve just said. Honestly, I didn’t have a clue.’
‘Of course you didn’t. It’s one of the many things I love about you. I totally get that this is a “me” problem – the therapist made that clear.’
‘I still can’t believe you saw a therapist.’
‘Me neither. Anyway, have you had any more thoughts about Finn and what you’re going to do?’
‘No, and I’m not talking to you about Finn. That’s just too weird. What’s next for you, do you think? Back to Glasgow?’
‘Bloody hell, no. I think I’ll contact the cruise line when I get back. They were pretty happy with me, so I don’t think I’ll have any trouble getting more work from them. Are you sure I can’t see Meg before I go?’
‘I’d prefer it if you didn’t. She was so unhappy when you left the first time. Weeks went by before she stopped hanging round the door and whining at the time when you’d normally get home. I know she’d be delighted to see you, but she’s just starting to settle and I don’t want to set her back.’
‘I understand. Perhaps you can tell her you saw me and that I send her all my love.’
‘I’ll certainly do that.’
He drains his cup and stands. ‘Right. I’ll leave you in peace.’
‘What are you going to do?’
‘To be honest, I didn’t expect things to go this way, so it didn’t occur to me to book flexible flights, which means I’m stuck here for the duration. I’ve got the hire car though, so maybe I’ll do some sightseeing. Don’t worry, I’m not going to be in your face all the time. I’ll see you later, yeah?’
‘Yeah, OK.’
I’m surprised to notice how relieved I am when he walks away. I’m glad that he’s got the message and has stopped trying to persuade me to go back to him, and I feel more at ease in his company than I was expecting, but him being here is still a distraction I definitely don’t need. The fact that his presence has riled Gina up even more is also not particularly helpful, although she’s been keeping her distance since our contretemps yesterday. Is it too much to hope that maybe she’s got the message as well?
And then, of course, there’s Finn. I still don’t have a clue what, if anything, to do about him. I haven’t heard any more from him, not that I was expecting to, but he’s definitely got under my skin and, the more I think about it, the more I feel there’s unfinished business there.
26
It’s the final morning of the retreat and I’m ready to go home. Although it’s lovely here, and I can’t fault Hugh and Cara’s hospitality, I need to get away from Gina and her death stares. She hasn’t spoken a word to me since I stood up to her in the garden, but she positively oozes hostility every time we have to share a space. I’m sure the fact that I’ve become more friendly with Suzie and Grace since their revelations the other morning hasn’t helped, but I’m frankly tired of her and whatever her problem with me is.
The good news is that Angus has kept his promise and hasn’t made any more attempts to persuade me to go back to him. In fact, I’d go as far as to say we’re being very grown-up and amicable at the moment. He’s sensibly decided that I’m not at risk of attack on my morning walks and left me to take them alone. In theory, I was using the time to concentrate on the plot of my book, but the reality is that I spent them daydreaming about Finn. My favourite fantasy is one where our kiss at the waterpark ends in the bedroom, and I have to say I have rather enjoyed the images. The only downside is that my mind became so Finn focused that it fooled me into thinking I actually saw hima couple of times. The first Finn doppelganger was thankfully unmasked before I made a fool of myself. He looked just like Finn from the back, but the moment he turned to greet someone else, it was clear it wasn’t him. The second time, I actually called out before I realised I was trying to get the attention of a total stranger. That one did take a bit of unravelling, as it turned out my French was nowhere near good enough to explain to a confused local that I thought he was someone else.
After our usual delicious breakfast, I pack my bags, double and triple-checking that I haven’t left anything behind, before going to look for Cara so I can say goodbye.
‘Is everything all right?’ she asks me when I find her in the dining room.
‘Absolutely. I just wanted to thank you for looking after us all so well. I think I’ll have to stay away from the scales for a while.’
She beams. ‘Thank you. It’s been a real pleasure having you and I hope you found inspiration.’
‘I did. Who knows, I might even come back.’
‘Do. Can I ask you a question before you leave?’
‘Of course.’
‘Hugh and I have tried not to pry, but we’re naturally curious and can’t help ourselves. When you first arrived, you seemed to be getting on very well with Finn.’
‘Yes,’ I say, suddenly unsure where this is going or whether I’m going to like it.
‘And now you seem to be getting on well with Angus.’
‘He’s my ex,’ I tell her firmly.
‘He’s still keen on you though.’
