Page 22 of Happily Never After
‘Let me see. It says there are a number of places for writing, including their very own library, tables and chairs in the garden, or your room if you prefer. That’s OK, isn’t it? Sitting under an olive tree, typing away. Sounds blissful if you ask me. There’s also a retreat leader on hand to give guidance and feedback, and each day starts with a session on story arcs, character journeys and keeping the reader engaged, whatever those things mean.’
‘See, that’s what I’m talking about. If there’s anything guaranteed to send me down a rabbit hole into analysis paralysis, it’s someone telling me how to write a story arc or questioning my character journey. Having confidence in your writing is difficult enough without someone standing over your shoulder and telling you you’re doing it all wrong.’
‘OK. We’ll rule this one out. The next one is in Croatia. Oh, hang on. Same problem with the daily sessions, although they’ve upped the ante by saying the person running the daily sessions is a leading industry professional.’
‘That’s even worse.’
‘This one looks interesting. South of France – nice – and no daily sessions. There’s a mentor if you want one, but other than that it looks like you’re left to your own devices. They also lay on trips to local markets and other activities to give you breaks if you want to recharge. Again, all your meals are provided, including dinner with wine and a bar with an honesty box. Fuck it, Laura. If you don’t go, I’ll pretend to be you and go instead. Have a look.’
She pushes the laptop over to me and focuses on pouring out the tea. She’s right; it does look nice. The house is large and decorated in a very French style, although the website states that the owners are English. There are artistic shots of delicious-looking plates of food in the dining room, the well-stocked bar, the bedrooms and gardens. The text makes it clear that the owners are aware that writers are a diverse bunch, so you can be as social or antisocial as you want. The only time you all have to be together is for meals.
‘What do you think?’ Liv asks.
‘I’m still not sure.’
‘Why don’t we let fate decide?’
‘What have you got in mind?’
‘It seems to me that you have two fundamental blocks where this retreat is concerned. One is the fact that you’re convinced you’re going to hate it. But, as we’ve already agreed, you won’t know that until you try it, so we’ll mark that one as resolved. The second is Meg.’
‘Yes.’
‘So, I’m going to challenge you to investigate doggy daycare options. If they’re all terrible, then you stay. But if you find one you like, that’s the universe clearing a path for you and you have to go.’
‘I don’t know, Liv.’
‘Look, she’s not going to feel totally abandoned. Apart from the fact that, love her as I do, her emotions just aren’t that complex, I’m still going to be here for her in the evenings so she’ll have continuity. Just do a bit of research, will you?’
I sigh. ‘Fine. I won’t find anywhere though, I’m certain of that.’
9
Claire stared at the bedroom ceiling as she ran through the checklists in her head. Although she couldn’t see it in the darkness, she was acutely aware of the crack that ran from the tatty light fitting to the corner of the room. How many hours had she spent lying here, tracing its contours while planning her escape from Darren? She glanced across at him, his rhythmic snoring the only sound in their otherwise silent house. She’d never known she was capable of such hatred until these last few months.
Of course, the shove in the kitchen had just been the beginning. Since then, the violence had escalated and, although he’d been pitifully apologetic afterwards each time, buying her flowers and showering her with gifts, the gaps between outbursts were getting shorter and she needed to get away before he did something really serious to her. The problem was that he controlled virtually every part of her life now; even her passport was locked away in a filing cabinet ‘for safe keeping’. Still, he didn’t know about the shoebox at the back of the wardrobe where she was slowly starting to build her getaway kit. Any cash tips from work went straight in there, along with the replacement passport she’d ordered because she’d ‘lost’ the original and the card for the secretbank account she’d set up. She just had a few more things to get, and then she’d be ready.
Thankfully, the threat of having to go on retreat appears to have unblocked me a little. The book has started to flow slightly better and I’m making good progress towards the climax of the first half. It’s always tricky, this bit. You want to accelerate and get on to the next part of the story, but you know that the reader wants to savour the journey without feeling rushed. I’m reviewing the last couple of chapters, checking the pace, when my phone rings.
‘Hi, is that Laura?’ a female voice asks when I answer.
‘Yes.’
‘This is Donna, from Donna’s Doggy Daycare. You left me a voicemail message this morning. How can I help?’
I glance down at Meg, curled up asleep in her basket. If I’m ambivalent about the idea of going on retreat, that’s nothing compared to the guilt I feel about potentially dumping Meg on strangers while I’m away. Liv has been very firm with me and I do understand that I can’t let Meg dictate my whole life but, as I’ve pointed out several times, she is a living being and I am responsible for her welfare. I’ve looked at all sorts of options for her while I’m away and, up until now, I haven’t liked any of them. There are plenty of dog walkers who will call in once or twice a day to take her out, but she’s used to being around people for most of the time and I worry she’ll be lonely.
‘I’m thinking of going away for a couple of weeks,’ I explain to Donna. ‘I’ve not left my dog before and I usually work from home, so she’s used to being around people all day.’
‘Of course she is,’ Donna says robustly. ‘And you worry about her being on her own for long periods.’
‘Yes.’
‘I’m sure we can help. When would you be going?’
I give her the dates.
‘Yes, we could definitely squeeze her in. So, there are several options, depending on what you think would suit her best. She could either come to us as a boarder and stay for the duration of your trip, or she could come as a day-doggy.’
