“I have no issues with keeping her safe,” I clarify. “Nobody would be able to keep her safer than I could. It’s just all the other bullshit I can’t deal with.”
“What bullshit? Is she giving you a hard time?” I turn my face, staring off into the distance and exhale all the airfrom my lungs. “It’s those damn fucking cartoon heart eyes, isn’t it?”
“I fucking wish,” I reply, snapping my gaze back to him. “I can deal with the cartoon eyes. It’s all the other …stuffthat’s doing my head in.”
“What other stuff?”
“Those books, for starters.”
“You have a problem with her reading?”
“No, it’s what they’re making her do that I have a problem with.”
His face screws up in confusion. “What are they making her do?”
I grimace slightly before saying, “You know … late at night when she’s in bed …alone.”
Even though that wasn’t the case last night, I still felt the need to clarify that last bit.
When the penny finally drops, he barks out a laugh, which pisses me off. There’s nothing funny about this.
“You have an issue with her masturbating?”
I rub the back of my neck. “She’s doing it on purpose to taunt me.”
“Ignore her.”
“Easier said than done. She’s pushing me to the limit. I even had to resort to desperate measures.”
“Such as?”
“I took Big-O to the backyard and put a bullet right through the centre of it.”
“Big-O?” he asks, confused.
“Her vibrator. That’s what she named it.”
This time, he cracks up. He roars laughing so hard he ends up having to grab hold of his stomach.
“It’s not funny, arsehole.”
“Oh, I beg to differ. It’s hilarious. I can’t wait to tell Arabella when I get home.” I throw my hands in the air,spin on my heels, and start walking back towards the house. “Where are you going?”
I pause for a second, feeling my entire body deflate. “I risked my life by calling you. I thought we could discuss this like men. Obviously, I was wrong.”
“Romeo.” I glance at him over my shoulder and see all the humour has now vanished from his face. “What do you mean by risking your life?”
I pull the scrunched-up piece of paper from my pocket and stalk back towards him. “This is what she gave me this morning.”
“What is it?”
“A shopping list. Read what she’s asking my men to buy.”
“I don’t see the problem …” he starts, but his words trail off as his eyes scan the page. When he bites back a smile and rolls his lips like he’s trying not to laugh, something in me snaps. For the first time in my life, I actually want to punch him.
“There’s nothing funny about that list,” I growl, snatching it back out of his hand.
“She’s young,” he says, shrugging. “Let her have fun. We were that age once. I really don’t see the issue.”