Page 138 of The Temptation
I blow out a long breath, making sure she hears it, so she knows just how frustrated I am. But deep down, buried beneath all the noise in my chest, there’s a part of me that’s glad she’s here. Even if I’ll never admit it out loud.
I’m accustomed to navigating my personal life on my own.
I always have been.
But for the first time, I’m hoping I won’t have to do that anymore. Because there’s a kind of silence in loneliness that screams louder than any crowd ever could.
And I’m tired.
Tired of shouldering everything on my own.
Tired of pretending it doesn’t eat away at me.
Tired of living like that’s all I deserve.
Lucia and I meet around the front of the car, andwithout even thinking, I reach for her hand like it’s my lifeline.
“Romeo,” she says softly as her fingers lace with mine. “It’s okay if you cry when we get in there. I’ve got you.”
“I’m not going to cry,” I murmur, even though I know there’s a possibility I might do just that.
It was a fucking struggle to keep my emotions at bay when Dante first told me the news, but seeing my mother and accepting that she’s really gone may be the thing that finally breaks me.
“I get it, I was you once,” she says. “You’ve been living in survival mode for so long, you probably don’t even realise it anymore. Always tense, always waiting for the next thing to go wrong.”
She pauses, her thumb brushing over my knuckles. “I bet even when things are quiet, your mind doesn’t let you rest. That’s how I felt when I was living with my father. And it’s not because I’m dramatic or paranoid. My body simply forgot what it was like to feel safe. You get used to holding your breath … bracing for impact. Pretending everything’s fine while fighting battles no one else sees.”
I don’t say anything. I can’t. But her words hit home, settling deep in places I’ve spent years trying to ignore.
She leans in a little closer and tightens her grip on my hand. “It’s not drama, Romeo. It’s trauma. And I know healing doesn’t happen overnight. But it starts with learning that love doesn’t always have to come with pain. That silence doesn’t mean someone’s about to hurt you. And that letting yourself rest isn’t a weakness. It’s what you deserve.”
Her voice drops to a whisper as she turns to face me. I glance down at her as her big, beautiful, hopeful brown eyes lock with mine.
“Let me be that for you. Let me be the one thing you don’t have to survive.”
I want that.
I want her.
I want to keep this woman and never let her go.
A knot forms in the back of my throat, thick and heavy, and I tilt my head towards the starlit sky, trying to breathe through it. Whatever she went through growing up has made her wiser than her nineteen years.
“What did I do to deserve you?” I find myself asking, my voice low and rough.
She smiles, but there’s a softness in her eyes that cuts right through me.
“You exist,” she says. “That’s enough for me.” She squeezes my hand again, like she’s anchoring me to the moment. “You don’t have to earn love, Romeo. Not from me. It’s yours, and it’s unconditional.”
Now would be the perfect time to tell her I love her back. I feel it.Boy, do I feel it.But the words get stuck in my throat, caught somewhere between fear and everything I was never taught about love.
So instead, I shift closer and press a kiss to her temple. It’s not the words she deserves, but it’s all I can give her right now. And I hope she understands. One day, I may be able to express my feelings as easily as she does.
The smell hits first. It’s cold, sterile, and unnatural. Like death has a scent, and it’s trying to settle into my skin.
Lucia is still glued to my side as the attendant leads us down a narrow corridor before stopping at one of the metal drawers.
I make a conscious effort not to squeeze her hand too hard. I don’t want to break her delicate fingers.
