Page 97 of Mr. Edwards
I’m too weak to fight.
As soon as her arms wrap around me, I break down. I feel like I just lost a part of me I never knew I wanted until this moment.
Chapter 22
Grayson
I pour more amber liquid into the glass, tossing my head back and drinking it down in one gulp. I’ve never been a heavy drinker, but I’ve drunk more than my fair share over the past few years, no thanks to Carlee. She not only fucked up my heart when she left, she’s partly responsible for the demise of my liver too.
I still can’t believe she came here. I thought I was seeing things at first, like a goddamn apparition. I can’t even begin to tell you how many times I’ve wished for just that… for her to show up at my door. But once I got over the initial shock, the hurt and anger took over.
I’ve waited years for that talk, and now she’s suddenly ready.What a joke. It almost drove me to the point of insanity not knowing where she was, or why she’d left. So, I can’t help but wonder what she had to say to me today. If she was finally ready to give me answers. Why now? Why after all this time? I guess I’ll never know because I didn’t give her a chance. Her unexplained rejection is still too raw, so slamming the door in her face was purely a reflex.Fuck my life. And fuck Carlee and whatever the hell her last name is.
As much as it pains me to say it, when I told her I was done I meant it. I can’t keep torturing myself like this. It’s time to move on. Why does that thought make me want to hurl?
My free hand grips the edge of the table until my knuckles turn white. Why did she come here? What did she want? Here I go again, letting her back into my head.
Raising my arm, I throw the crystal glass I’m holding across the room, it shatters into tiny pieces against the far wall, just like my pathetic heart.
“Fuck,” I scream. Why can’t I move the hell on?
I hear the key in the front door and I swing my body in that direction. The sudden movement has my drunk ass swaying on my feet. I know it’s not her, but that still doesn’t stamp out the hope rising in my chest.
The door opens, and Ashton steps inside. I can tell by the frown on his face he knows what went down today.
“If you came here to talk, I’m not in the mood,” I say.
“I wanted to check you were okay. Emma told me what happened.”
“Of course, she did,” I scoff.
I love Emma and Ashton like family, but nothing is sacred when your ex is best friends with your best friend’s wife.
“How’s your leg?” he asks.
“Fucked,” I say, just like everything else in my life. I want things to be normal again. I want the life I used to have back. I’m sick of the woe-is-me sap I’ve turned into.
“How did PT go today?”
“Cut the crap, Ashton, just say what it is you came here to say.”
“Fine,” he says, stepping up to the bar and pouring us both a drink. The last thing I need is more alcohol, but I want to get fucked up so I don’t have to feel anymore.
“Youneed to let her go.”
“And you need to mind your own business.”
“It’s time you started worrying about yourself. You’ve been there done that, she’s not the right girl for you.”
“That’s where you’re wrong… she’s theonlygirl for me.”
“Bullshit, you can do a whole lot better and you know it. Look at how she’s treated you the past few years. She ripped out your heart without so much as an explanation.”
“Don’t,” I snap, holding up my hand.
Everything he’s saying is true, but I still want to punch him for it. I wish more than anything I could erase what I feel for her, but after all this time she still owns my damn heart.
“Can’t you see this is just you, being you? You look after people. It’s what you do, what you’ve always done. You’re a caretaker, Gray. You looked after your mom and your sister when your dad died, you took care of me when…” He blows out a long breath. “…all that shit when down with Anastasia.” Ashton swallows hard before continuing. “Christ, you’re still looking out for me, and now I’m going to return the favor. This may be hard for you to hear but she doesn’t deserve you.”
