Page 65 of Mr. Edwards
She nods her head and internally I see red. I’m still trying to process what her piece of shit mother did to her and now I have this to deal with too. How many other people in her life have betrayed her? A lump rises to my throat… my heart bleeds for this poor sweet girl and the horrors she’s had to endure.
There were tough times after my father passed, but I was always loved and protected, my mother made sure of that. It was still hard for a kid who once had everything, to be suddenly thrust into the real world. To a place where we had to fend for ourselves, hoping that at the end of each day, we’d come out in one piece.
In the beginning, I remember being jealous that Ashton still had both his parents and an endless amount of money to burn. Now I feel like a selfish prick for feeling that way. It pales in comparison to anything Carlee had to face growing up.
Shifting her off my lap, I stand, then bend to scoop her up. Her arms wrap around my neck and she rests her cheek against my chest as I walk us into the bathroom.
Carlee’s eyes finally meet mine when I place her down on her feet. “Oh my gosh, you’re bleeding,” she says, her eyes widening to saucers. “I hurt you.” Fresh tears rise to her eyes.
I lean into the shower stall, turning on the faucet. “In my defense, my girlfriend’s got ninja skills,” I reply, shrugging it off like it’s not a big deal. I’m more concerned about her.
She comes to stand beside me, a washcloth in hand. Getting up on the tip of her toes, Carlee gently places it under my nose as she peppers tiny kisses all over my face.
“I’m so sorry.” I can see the anguish in her eyes, and it kills me. A bleeding nose is nothing compared to what she’s been through, and I don’t even know the details yet.
“You have nothing to be sorry for,” I state, placing my lips on her forehead. And she doesn’t. She told me she didn’t like sharing a bed, and I should’ve respected that. I’ve messed up badly, I only hope she can forgive me.
I reach for the hem of the T-shirt she’s wearing. “Lift up.”
She raises her hands in the air, and I gently drag the shirt over her head, tossing it on the floor. Crouching, I slide her panties down her legs and she steps out of them. I remove my sweats and reach for her hand leading us under the hot spray.
When I drape my arms around Carlee’s shoulders, she scoots closer, hugging my waist. “Talk to me, sweetheart.” She vigorously shakes her head. “Please.”
“I can’t,” she whispers.
“Yes, you can.”
Her sad pleading eyes move up to mine. “You don’t understand.”
“Help me understand.”
“I don’t want you to look at me differently.”
I cup her sweet face in my hands. “Nothing you can say will ever make me stop caring about you.” My statement has her inhaling a sharp breath as she tightens her hold. Whatever this guy did to her is bad, I can feel her body trembling beneath my hands. “I’ve got you,” I whisper.
I feel like scum for pushing her to stay over tonight, thinking her issues involved me… or our relationship. What a self-centered asshole I am. I deserved every blow I just took from Carlee.
I hold her in my arms for the longest time, running my hand soothingly down her back, giving her a moment to collect herself. “Is he the reason you can’t share a bed?”
“Yes.”
“How old were you when this happened?”
Diverting her gaze away from me, she whispers, “Thirteen,” but she doesn’t give me any more than that. I can see the shame in her eyes, and it tears me up inside.
“What did he do to you?” I don’t want the dirty details; I just need to know how far this went.
She clenches her eyes shut and I can see the pain on her face as she more than likely relives that moment in her mind.
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Don’t shut me out, sweetheart.”
“Please Grayson…”
“I need to know, Carlee, did he force himself on you?” She nods her head again and my body tenses, making her alarmed eyes snap back to me.
I hope my reaction doesn’t make her think this will change things between us, because nothing she could say would make me feel any different. If anything, it would make me love and admire her more. This woman has been to hell and back, and I’m in awe of her strength.
