Page 53 of Mr. Edwards
“Do what?”
“Psychoanalyze me.”
“I’m not psychoanalyzing you, sweetheart, I’m just calling it how I see it.”
“And how do you see it?” She’s getting annoyed, but we need to get past this so we can move forward. She’s pushing me away because she’s been constantly let down by the people who should’ve cared the most. I can’t begin to imagine the horrors she’s endured throughout her life. I’m sure I’d go crazy if I let my mind wander there for too long.
This is self-preservation, I understand that, but I need her to know I’d never treat her that way. I want to be someone she can always count on.
Standing, I remove my jeans, sheath my cock with a rubber, and climb back onto the bed. I need to be close to her when I say this.
She cautiously lies back down as I hover over her, maneuvering my body back between her thighs. “I’m not them,” I say, hoping she understands where I’m coming from.
I know her mother fucked her over, and I doubt she was the only one. That breaks my damn heart. Her vulnerability speaks to me, and in time I hope to bring down all her walls. She may not realize it yet, but she can count on me. I’m here for the long haul.
Carlee closes her eyes and lets out a breathy sigh when I slowly enter her again. “Look at me, baby.” As soon as she opens her pretty eyes, I see the tears that are pooling in them. Seeing her like this hurts. I gently brush the hair off her face, tucking it behind her ear. “Let me take care of you, sunshine. Let me fix what the others broke.”
It’s the weekend, and Carlee has the day off, so we’re going to spend it together. I feel like we’ve made real progress over the past few weeks. We’ve spent every chance we could together. Carlee is yet to admit she’s my girlfriend, but she’s still here and that’s enough for now.
She still kicks me out when it’s time for her to go to sleep, but that’s another wall I intend to knock down in time. I want to spend our nights together, and for her pretty face to be the first thing I see when I open my eyes in the morning. It’s hard with me working days and her nights. Our time together is limited, and I don’t want to waste a second of it.
I’m sitting on my front step waiting for her to arrive. A nervous energy runs through me. It’ll be her first time here, and I plan on making the most of it. If I’m lucky I may even convince her to stay over tonight.
When her little red shit-box pulls up, I leap to my feet and walk down to meet her at the curb. I’ve decided I’m going to get her a new car because I hate that she’s driving around late at night in that thing. I need her to be safe.
Most evenings, I’ve been waiting in the parking lot for her when her shift ends, so I can follow her home. There will be times when I’m out of town with work though, so I’ll be unable to do that then.
She exits the vehicle before I reach her, opening the back door to collect her bag. I told her to pack her bikini. Since my home is situated on the shores of Hermosa Beach, I’m going to give her a surfing lesson. I usually try to take my board out before I head to work each morning.I love being on the water, it’s a great way to start the day.
My favorite color is the ocean, and you can’t beat the thrill that comes with chasing the next wave.It’s freeing. The rest of the world disappears when I’m out there. For me, life’s a lot like surfing, to keep your balance you must keep moving. I only hope Carlee gets as much out of it as I do.
Sliding my arm around her waist, I pull her back to my front, burying my nose in her hair. I inhale deeply, her scent calms me.
“Hey, sunshine.”
“Hey, you.” She turns in my arms, getting up on the tip of her toes to plant a kiss on my lips.
“Did you find the place alright?”
“Uh-huh.” Her eyes dart toward my home. “I can’t believe you live here all by yourself… it’sbig.”
“What did you expect? Big cock, big house, you know the saying.”
She shakes her head and laughs. I love that sound coming from her. “I’m pretty sure you made that one up too, but I’m starting to see a pattern here. Are you sure you’re not overcompensating for something, Mr. Edwards?”
“My dick’s huge, Carlee, you and I both know that’s a fact. I don’t need to compensate for shit. As for the size of my house, I was just thinking ahead. You and our future babies are going to live here with me one day, so you better start getting used to it.”
Her face drops, and although I meant what I said, I realize it’s probably too soon to be talking that far into our future. Here I am planning the rest of our lives together, and she’s constantly looking for reasons to run. She’s still warming to the idea of our relationship, so maybe I should’ve waitedbefore throwing the whole marriage and family thing into the mix.
I take her bag from her hand, slinging my arm around her shoulder, and guiding her toward the house. Let’s hope she can forget what I said. She just got here and I don’t want to fight with her.
“Grayson,” she says, halting her steps.
“Yeah?”
“I need to tell you something… I don’t want kids. Like ever.”
“You don’t?” She turns to face me, and I do the same. I can tell by the look on her face that she’s serious about this. I’ve never not seen kids in my future, so her statement should send up a huge red flag for me, but somehow it doesn’t.
