Page 31 of Fractured Constellations
“I’ll try,” I whisper, opening my eyes to look into his, the green that is usually dark brightening as he flashes me a small smile.
“Thank you, Goldilocks,” he replies, giving my leg another squeeze before he removes his hand and continues eating.
Picking up a slice of the freshly baked bread, which Blade even buttered for me, I take a small bite, breathing through the initial wave of sickness as the taste hits my mouth. I usuallylove buttered bread, especially fresh bread like this, but this is just another way cancer fucks me over—changing my appetite, sucking the joy out of eating until it all tastes like shit.
“You’re doing so well, Princess,” Blade murmurs into my ear, leaning close until his scent of smokey vanilla washes over me and somehow helps to calm the nausea. “I’m so fucking proud of you.”
I swallow hard, my eyes pricking at his words. It’s stupid, but no one before has recognized the small things that become so hard, like eating, getting dressed, or even getting out of bed. So to have him not only see my struggle but encourage me when it feels impossible means more than I could say.
We spend the rest of the meal like this, his soft, whispered words of encouragement helping me to eat more than I would have managed on my own. He pours me the ginger tea Thorn ordered, which also helps to settle my stomach. Although I don’t get close to clearing my plate, I eat about half of what he gave me, and my nausea has eased by the end of the meal.
Having such a full stomach makes my eyelids droop, and he even notices that straight away.
“I’m going to help Luna to her room,” he states to the others, pushing his chair back and standing, offering his hand out for me to take.
A part of me worries that our parents will read too much into the gesture, seeing what our relationship has become, and I’m just not ready for that yet. I don’t have the energy to deal with the fallout. But the bigger part, the part that needs the comfort of Blade’s hand in mine right now when I feel so vulnerable, doesn’t care, and so I reach out, letting him wrap his large palm around mine and help me to my feet.
He tucks me under his arm, wrapping it around my waist and basically taking all my weight as exhaustion sweeps over me in a dizzy rush as we leave the room.
“I’ve got you, Goldilocks,” he rumbles in my ear, my feet being swept off the ground as he picks me up in his arms.
“I can walk, Blade,” I mumble, though once again, my body betrays me as my arms lift and wrap around his neck and I sink into his embrace.
“Sure,” he replies in a droll tone, not even attempting to set me down as he carries me.
I blink eyes open I didn’t know I’d closed to find we’re in the hallway, heading towards the stairs. He carries me like it’s no big deal, like I’m weightless, and I snuggle closer into his large, warm body, closing my eyes once more as we ascend.
“Stay with me,” I plead as he walks, because as much as I want my independence, my mind is already slipping into the darkness of sleep, and the idea of being alone again scares me.
“Always, Goldilocks.”
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
“CAN YOU HOLD ME” BY NF, BRITT NICOLE
LUNA
Iwake up trembling, the cold so all-encompassing that I feel like I’m in the middle of the Antarctic. The chills hit without warning. Violent shudders that make my teeth chatter, my body seizing, they’re so strong.
Chase is there instantly, his body heat enveloping me as he wraps himself around me without a word. Even though the room is mostly dark, with only my lamp on low, I know it’s him by his warm cinnamon scent. The contrast between my ice and his fire should create steam, but instead, we find equilibrium.
“I’m here, Star,” he whispers, his body touching me everywhere, lending me his heat because I can’t seem to make my own. Painstakingly slowly, my body starts to relax, sinking into him, the chills no longer so vicious.
There’s movement in front of me, Thorn’s fingers finding mine under the blanket.
“Cold?” The usual teasing in his voice is missing, instead a thread of concern as he shuffles closer to my front, his body heating all the parts that Chase can’t reach. It’s delicious, and I hold in the moan that wants to escape.
“I’m fine,” I lie, even as shivers still race through me. He moves even closer, his warmth like a furnace.
“Liar.” His punishment is a kiss on my nose, his hands rubbing up and down my arms, creating even more heat. I wonder where Blade is, because he was the one I fell asleep with, but then another shiver steals my thoughts and I’m just grateful someone is here.
I should pull away. I should fight this thing happening between us for so many fucking reasons. Our parents are married. They were utter assholes when I first arrived. They made me cry several times. Plus the elephant in the room, I may not live all that long.
But I don’t. I can’t. My body refuses, even if my mind screams this isn’t a good idea. That we may get hurt even worse when they realize that they could do so much better. That caring for someone who’s sick and may not make it will drain a part of them that they’ll never get back.
“I can hear you thinking too hard, Star,” Chase’s voice murmurs behind me, and he nuzzles into my neck, placing a kiss on the skin behind my ear. A different shiver falls over my body then. “Tell me what has your mind whirring so loud.”
I sigh, sucking my lower lip in and nibbling it.
