Page 8 of Level Up
She looks over at me and I give her a nod before moving down the counter to help her.
“Would you like to take a look at something?” I say, trying to keep the smile on my face despite the fact that her shopping companion still seems outraged by my existence. He looks away guiltily when I fix my smile on him.
“That one,” she says, tapping on the glass. “With the orange cap.”
“Great choice!” I bend down to open the display from the back. I pull out a box from below the shelf and check that it’s the right model: a Kaweco Student fountain pen in the 70s Soul colour. “It’s my mom’s favourite, too,” I add when I set it on the counter, and the woman smiles back politely, albeit slightly bemused. “This is her shop, I mean. Like, fountain pens are sort of her jam.”
I should not be allowed to human.
But that’s when I notice it. The partially-obscured graphic on the guy’s t-shirt that is all too familiar.
“Oh, hey, I loveSteampunk 1877!” I blurt out before I can think better of it, which seems to startle him, and he looks down at his shirt like he’d forgotten he was wearing it. The woman with him just snickers.
“Oh my god, don’t get him started about video games,” she says, although I don’t think there’s any fear of this guy saying anything ever, so we’re probably fine.
I help the woman pick out a converter and a bottle of Ferris Wheel Press ink to go with the pen and get her checked out. She still seems thrilled by her haul, even more so when I put it all in a small paper bag stamped with the store logo. So she collects paper bags too, I suppose. Mom truly has found her people.
She thanks me before turning to leave, though she has to give the guy with her a harsh shove, since he seems to bedistracted by…staring at me?Oof. I’m seriously the worst at this—I am definitely not a people-person.
“You’re being such a creep,” she hisses at him as they reach the door and walk out.
It’s my biggest sale of the day, though, and while I don’t work on commission or anything, I still feel a little proud of it. And Mom is proud, too, when I tell her I sold someone a Kaweco Student fountain pen.
“That’s my favourite!” she says after she returns from her appointment. She takes off her sunglasses once she’s inside and her pupils are terrifyingly huge.
“They gave you the drops, huh?” I say, and she waves me off dismissively.
“Go on, I’ll take it from here,” she says, coming around to my side of the counter.
“You can’t even read the screen, can you?” I motion towards the iPad we use to process sales, and she squints at it futilely. “I’ll stay on cash the rest of the day. I can catch up on online orders after closing.”
“Thank you, my little pumpernickel,” Mom coos, kissing the side of my head.
“You know that meansfart goblin, right?”
“Yes, I know.”
Monday night isa streaming night for me, so I finish packing up online orders as quickly as I can after the store closes before getting settled in my apartment to unwind a little until the stream. Gives me time to eat and prep, including a wardrobe change.
I throw a chunky, light brown cardigan over my navy blueDon’t get thocky, kidt-shirt—the one I had Victory design for me (despite her protests about the reference being a misquote)with Han Solo typing on a mechanical keyboard—and some hole-riddled grey sweatpants that no one will see on stream anyway.
With a half hour to go before the stream, I guzzle a cup of tea while I scroll through my list of downloaded games on Play’N to choose tonight’s offering. I’m feeling moredark academiacozy thanfuzzy bunnycozy tonight, so I opt for playing someSteampunk 1877, inspired by that weird guy’s shirt earlier today. That whole interaction was awkward as heck, but it’s a good game, and even though it’s not my usual for streaming, I think it could work. Just to wander around the city and pick up some easy fetch quests, ones without combat. It’s not something I’ve tried on my channel before, but it might be fun. And the vibes of this game are, as they say,immaculate.
I start the stream a couple minutes early to give people time to tune in, and immediately the chat fills with my regular viewers asking about my day and sharing fun things about their own lives. It’s my favourite part of the experience, getting to know my subscribers.
I give a bunch of regulars a shoutout, as well as a hello for a first-time viewer who’s excited to be here. I’d noticed that I got a handful of new subs after mySOAspeedrun, and I’m a little worried that they will be expecting more of that sort of thing, especially when someone asks if I’ll be playingThe Stones of Ayor 4on stream when it comes out in a few days.
Except for some bouncing and squealing with Victory, I’ve been trying to keep myself pretty chill about the new game. Mostly because, if I let myself think about it, then I can’t think about anything else. The last thing I want is to overhype it in my mind and then get disappointed. And while mySOA3speedrun last week was done in honour of the new game’s impending release, I’ve not talked about it much. I was the same way with the lastZeldagame—I more or less pretendedit wasn’t a thing until release day, and then I waited outside B.A. Start Games at midnight to pick up a physical copy.
I intend to do the same forThe Stones of Ayor 4, despite the fact that I preordered and pre-downloaded the game onto my computer through Play’N already. If I werenormalabout this, I would just wait until midnight and then start playing right away, but no. There’s going to be a limited release Deluxe Edition for some consoles—that I don’t even own—which includes a paper map of Ayor’s Rest, a booklet with lore facts, and models of some of the characters from the game, and I intend to be there at midnight to get it.
I’ll bet Scones is going to get the Deluxe Edition. He’ll probably do a goddamn unboxing on stream just to rub it in everyone’s face. I wouldn’t even be surprised if his local store gives him a free copy, being a minor celebrity as he is—although no one knows what he looks like, so maybe not. And while it’s possible he lives in a small enough town that everyone knows everyone’s business, he’s always given me the impression of being a city person. I honestly have no idea where he lives, except that I know he’s Canadian too, because he once mentioned shopping at No Frills. But that doesn’t tell me much. In any case, he’s probably not quite the small fish in a big pond that I am, here in Toronto. My local game shop has no idea who I am.
By the time I’m ready to officially begin, I have way more viewers than usual, and I almost freeze up. I’m not used to this. I don’t know what’s expected of me. I don’t know what they want.How do I do this, again?
I take a moment to re-center myself and then start off today’s stream the same way I always do, by holding up the keyboard I’ve chosen for the evening and explaining why I selected it this time. Maybe the newbies won’t understand, but it’s my thing, and I intend to keep doing my thing no matter what. Ideally.
“I know it’s an odd choice to go for tactile switches for an action-oriented game,” I say to the camera as I tap one of the keys repeatedly. “But I’m not doing anything too intense today, and I think that the sound it makes sort of fits the steampunk vibe. Plus, I modded the board to get a bit more…thock.”
