Page 35 of Level Up
“You have a cat?” Damien asks as I walk over to the kitchen to get the cat treats, still wearing my headphones.
“Not mine,” I tell him when I return, holding out a bit of dehydrated chicken for my uninvited houseguest. “The neighbourhood cats around here just think they can waltz in whenever they want.”
He laughs. “Maybe because you let them in.”
I look over my shoulder at the chat window as Bitte licks another treat pinched between my fingers. “If you’d been raised by my mother and grandmother, you would have the compulsion to feed every cat you meet, too. It’s genetic or something.”
“I’m not sure if I’m a cat person,” he says, squinting his eyes pensively. “In theory they seem cool, but my sister has one and every time I’m over there I think he wants to murder me.”
“I would still try to feed him.” I laugh but return my attention to Bitte right before she decides she’s had enough and wants to leave.
“You know, I think you’d like my sister,” Damien says after I shut the window. “She’s anintroverted weirdo nerdtoo, or whatever, but in a different way, Iguess.”
“Stationery nerd?” I say as I get back into my game. “Like my mom.”
“Stationery, cats, knitting… She basically can’t wait to be a grandmother, which I’m sure her fiancé is thrilled about.”
“She’s engaged?”
“Yeah…” He doesn’t sound very enthused about that. “He’s fine, just kind of boring.”
“Bleh.”
“Yeah, but—” Something behind Damien suddenly distracts him, and when he turns to look, I can see Malcolm strutting into the living room behind him, although the mic doesn’t seem to pick up whatever he’s saying.
Damien pulls off the headphones, but I can still hear him say, “We’re kind of in the middle of something. … Not likethat?—”
Malcolm swoops in all of a sudden and swipes the headphones from Damien’s grip, squatting down until he’s eye level with the computer monitor and shoving the headphones over his ears. The glitter nail polish on his right hand twinkles under Damien’s desk lamp; he’s still wearing the flouncy shirt but now he has a deep blue brocade vest over it. That’s what he wears on a date, I guess.
“Hello, Adorable Audrey,” he says with a grin, and it makes me laugh.
“Hi, Malcolm.” I give him a small wave. “How was your date with Evan?”
He sighs dramatically—wistfully, even—putting a hand over his heart. “She is the most incredible person I have ever known.”
I can vaguely hear Damien arguing with him, trying to get his headphones back, but Malcolm holds him off.
“And how was your couch time with Damien today?” Malcolm asks, keeping his hands over the headphones so Damien can’t yank themoff.
I can feel myself blushing, but I hope it doesn’t show on camera. “PlayingMariowas fun.”
“Just go easy on him, okay? It’s been a while?—”
Damien manages to wrestle the headphones free and get them back on his head. “Sorry for all?—”
“I think his virginity is growing back!” Malcolm says, leaning close enough to shout into the built-in mic on the headphones, and then plants a kiss on his cheek before Damien pushes him away.
“Go write Evan’s name on your notebook with little hearts or something,” Damien grumbles, holding him at arm’s length.
“Goodnight, Adorable Audrey,” Malcolm manages to shout into the microphone before standing up and whirling around to leave the room.
“Oh my god,” I say with a laugh.
“I know, he’s the worst,” Damien replies, though there’s laughter in his voice as well.
“I love him,” I say, and he breaks into a grin.
“Yeah, me too.”
