Page 128 of Boots, Bucket Lists & Bad Ideas
Tickle.
Torture.
The same toy Bronx and Jade were discussing in The Crimson Hollow. I can boldly say it is not on my fetish list. I discovered that the moment I’d been tied to a bed and assaulted by a feather like it was some kind of erotic paintbrush.
My skin had twitched, just as it does now. My jaw had locked, and all I had wanted was to vanish into the mattress and hit a hard reset on the night. And don’t even get me started when that same woman put a set of ridiculous fuzzy bunny ears on my head.
I draw the line at bunny ears.
What did she think I was?
The fucking Easter Bunny?
Hell, I draw the line at tying me up. It’s gotten me into more inescapable predicaments than I’d like to admit.
Like when she upped the ante, drizzling honey across my chest as if she were glazing a holiday ham to serve at Easter brunch, and then tossing more feathers at me. I looked like a half-plucked chicken, sticky and itchy, leaving feathers showing up in places for days.
Days.
I remember walking through the feed store feeling much like my current state, when something shifted in my jeans. Next thing I knew, I was plucking a pink feather out of my waistband like some kind of cowgirl showgirl.
Now, I’m waiting for a hidden fire ant to reveal itself.
“You’re walkin’ like someone filled your boots with gravel.” Dean starts at one corner of the tent, securing the first strand of lights. “You need one of those donut pillows?”
I grab a sleeve of sample-size paper cups for the jerky samples and chuck it at him.
“Choke on that, jackass.”
He catches it mid-air and grins. “Just tryin’ to support your recovery, brother.”
“Don’t bother. Just set up at the booth according to the template I designed.”
Dean weaves the lights in and out of the roof poles. “It’s not every day our big brother yanks down his pants, whips out his bare pork sword, and swings it around on the side of the road.”
“I hate all of you.” I stand quickly and bump into the table, knocking over a rack.
I curse.
“I bet not as much as those ants going full seek-and-destroy on your testies?” Wyatt shakes out the extension cord like a rope.
They have no idea.
“Campfire was really educational last night.” Wyatt drags the end of the extension cord toward the power source with a wicked grin. “Didn’t know we had a streaker among us.”
I grit my teeth and keep unpacking boxes, a little aggressively. Flyer piles slide on the ground, and I dump out the burlap bags that were in a neat stack.
If I ignore the guys, maybe they’ll get bored.
I know better.
“Oh, come on,” Dean drawls, securing the lights in place with clips. “Give us details.”
“I’m sure Jade gave y’all lots of details.”
“Details about an anatomy lesson she never signed up for.” He gestures at the front of his pants, and they all crack. “You didn’t fight off fire ants, you invited ‘em to foreplay,” Dean chokes out between breaths.
“Who gets a boner from insect bites, man?” Levi manages between gasps.
