Page 45 of Holiday Unscripted
I look down at the bottle of beer and close my eyes as I try to calm the racing of my heart. The minute he came down and asked me about that night, I knew this was going to be it. I would be the one who would bare my soul and then he would shatter it, just like he did seven years ago with the silence. I thought for sure I would be the one to throw it in his face, but I was not expecting what he said. “Why didn’t you just talk to me?” The question comes out as a whisper and only when it’s finally out do I look up at him.
“Why didn’t you?” he throws the question back into my court.
“For one”—I place my open palms on the counter and push up—“I was embarrassed.” My voice rises as I continue to talk, “We had just had sex and, let’s be honest, I wasn’t that experienced, and I don’t know—” I throw up my hands because I’ve never placed the blame on myself. I’ve had the what-if conversations, but it usually was what if I hadn’t left. Or what if I never kissed him back. It was never what if I would have forced him to talk to me. “I don’t know,” I say more calmly.
“How would you have felt if you woke up after our night and I wasn’t there?” I swallow down at his question as the back of my neck starts to feel heated.
I move my hand to cup it. “It’s not about what I did, it’s about what you did.”
“God, you are so stubborn,” he hisses at me. “Answer the fucking question, Elizabeth.” His voice is tight. “What would you have done if you woke up and I was gone? You looked around and all of my things, gone.” His eyes bore into mine. “If you had the best night of your life and you got up and looked around, and I was gone.” My chest gets tight as he continues to speak, “You call my name twice, but all that is there is silence.” Breathing is getting harder and harder as he continues, “You sit back down on the bed and wonder, did I dream it? Was it another dream where I finally got to kiss you?” The lump in my throat forms now. “But you can still vaguely smell my cologne…” He trails off. “What would you have done?” He doesn’t wait for me to answer, instead he answers for me, “You would have set my house on fire.”
I look up to the ceiling because he is not lying, I would have done that. “But then you show up at my house and you think I’m going to talk to you. I’m going to pull you aside or get you alone so you can talk to me. I thought maybe you were regretting it. So I braced myself for the talk. Braced myself for the words. Braced myself, knowing it would never be the same between us. But instead of all of that, I got silence.”
“Nate,” I say his name and he just shakes his head.
“No, Elizabeth,” he says, looking to the side and all I can do is stare at him, “do you know what that did to me?”
“Yes.” I push away from the counter and get off the stool. “I know what that did to you because I felt the same way. I was hurt.” I put both hands on the counter stretched out by my sides. “Fuck, why do you think I fucking went all the way across the fucking world?” I shout at him and now it’s his turn to look at me shocked. “Yeah, that’s right. You think I wanted to do my semester in Australia?” I don’t wait for him to answer me, just like he didn’t wait for me. “No, I didn’t, but I did it because I knew if I stayed here, and we just pretended that night had never happened, I would have been crushed and so broken-hearted, I don’t think I would have survived. The pain was that deep.”
“Elizabeth,” he says my name the same way I said his, but now the ball is in my court and I’m not going to let him get away with it.
“No, Nate.” Unlike him, I stare into his eyes so he can see the hurt. “Do you know what that did to me?” I walk around the island, our eyes on each other. “Do you have any idea what that did to me?”
“Yes,” he replies in a whisper, “because I felt it too.”
I stand in front of him. “I’m sorry,” I say the two words I vowed I would never say to him. Hearing how he was just as hurt as me, I say them. I raise my hand, seeing it shake a little, feeling it in my soul as I place it gingerly in the middle of his chest. I feel his heart beating quickly, in time with mine. “I’m so sorry.”
“Not as much as I am.” His voice is as broken as I feel. “Not nearly as much as I am.” He puts his hand on top of mine. His head shakes and I move my hand around his neck. He licks his lips as I get up on my tippy-toes, finally letting myself touch him more. I run my hand through his hair and down the back of his shirt.
Neither of us says a word as I press myself into him, wrap both arms around his neck, and kiss his jaw softly before he bends his head, his forehead on mine. I take a deep breath in, then he closes the gap and kisses me. This kiss is unlike the one in the bathroom. It’s sweet and soft, and his tongue slides in with mine for just a minute before he lets me go. His nose is against mine as my hand leaves his neck to cup his cheek. Our eyes lock on to each other, as our hands roam.
I can’t stop touching him. I don’t want to stop touching him. I turn my head to the side, kissing him again, this time his hands move from beside him and go to my back. I let go of his lips and this time he takes a deep breath in as my hands move from his neck to the side of his face.
“You,” he says right before he kisses me again, and the softness is gone, “you fucking drive me insane.” This kiss is full of need. Full of lust. Full of anger and frustration that for the past seven years we’ve both been thinking the other person was wrong. His hands move from my back up my sides as his tongue fights with mine. One of his hands moves down to cup my ass while the other wraps around the back of my neck.
The kiss deepens as he pulls me up. My legs wrap around his waist as he turns and walks out of the room, the sleep shirt I am wearing moves up to the tops of my thighs. My mouth is on his as he climbs the stairs to his bedroom. He walks into his bedroom and sits on the bed. My knees go to the sides of his hips, straddling him, as I move my head to the side and deepen the kiss. His hands move my long sleep shirt up and then his hand palms my ass, my booty shorts so thin I can feel the heat from his hand. I let go of his lips and his mouth moves down to my neck as his hands slide up my back and then down again to my ass, squeezing it and then back up again. My own hands move from the side of his neck down his arms and up again.
“Seven fucking years,” he mumbles as I slide my tongue into his mouth. Our hands are frantic with the need to touch the other person. Bunching his shirt in my hands, I pull it up over his head, tossing it to the side before I kiss him again. This time I need more, so I rotate my hips on his covered cock and our mouths swallow our moans.
His hands trail from my ass to my back as he pulls the shirt up and over my head, leaving me with just my black thong on. His mouth bends to take one nipple in his mouth. My back arches as he bites it, then kisses the middle of my chest moving to suck my other nipple as my hand holds the back of his neck. His eyes come up to mine as he lets my nipple go. “Seven fucking years, Elizabeth,” he pants breathlessly.
“I know,” I reply, moving my hips back and forth on his hard cock. My mouth waters to taste him again. My pussy is dripping, practically begging to have it slam into me. My hand itches to touch it. I place my hand behind me on his knee, putting the other one on his shoulder and move faster now. “Dreamed about this,” I admit to him in my haze of arousal as he grips one ass cheek and then his other hand holds on to the back of my neck. “Need you.” I arch my back when both of his hands move to grip my tits in them. He pinches my nipples between two of his fingers before squeezing them in his closed fist. My head moves to the side as he devours me. The kiss is so much better than I have ever imagined. The kiss I’ll be forever remembering from this moment. The kiss that will probably be the one I’ll compare every other kiss to for the rest of my life. I push his chest as he falls onto his back and I lie down on him.
My hips lift, giving me access to his cock as I reach between us and palm it. His hands rub the side of my thighs. “Need you too,” he groans. I get off and kneel beside him before I push his shorts down over his cock. I don’t even wait for it to be completely free before he’s in my mouth. I grip the base of his cock and let my mouth meet my hand before moving back up, working him with my mouth and my hand. “Fuck,” he hisses out, lifting his hips to fuck my mouth at the same time pushing the shorts off of his hips. “Going to hit the back of your throat.” He grips my hair in his fist, not letting me move but instead fucking my mouth. My other hand moves between my legs and into my panties, sliding one finger into me. I moan wanting it to be his fingers and not mine. “Where is your other hand?” he growls, his hips not missing a beat as he slams his cock into my mouth as deep as I’ll take him, even pushing it more and more.
“Dirty fucking girl.” He moves his hand and meets mine. “Going to help me finger-fuck you while you take my cock?” I don’t answer him with words, I just nod my head. Two of his fingers slide through my slit and into me with one of mine. “You don’t get to make yourself come.” He pushes my head down. “I get to make you come when you are in this bed.” His fingers move at the same rhythm as his hips, my own hips moving to get him to go faster, to get that first orgasm out of me. It’s lingering there on the surface, my body waiting to explode.
“First time I come,” he says, “it’s not going to be in your mouth.” He pulls my mouth off of him. “It’s going to be in your pussy.” His fingers slip out of me and then I watch him bring them to his mouth and he sucks them in. “Going to eat that pussy for hours, but first I’m going to need you to slide your pussy down my cock.” He holds his cock up for me. “Let me see you swallow me.”
I’m so gone for him, I swing my leg and move my thong to the side, ready to slide down his cock. Not slow, nothing about this is going to be slow. “I need you to make me come.” He grips my hips, his fingertips pressing so hard. “You’re so big.” I pause for just a second, adjusting to having him in me.
He helps move me up and down his cock, my hands moving behind me on his knees. He fists the side of my thong in his hand and in one move it snaps apart. “Want to see your pussy with my cock in it.”
“Then watch,” I urge as I move until the tip of his cock is about to come out of me as I slam down.
“Nothing better.” He licks his thumb. “I thought there was nothing better than seeing my cock in your mouth.” He rubs my clit up and down. “I was wrong.” My nipples tighten at the same time my stomach does. “Watching your pussy take my cock is much better.” He rubs my clit faster. “You are so close. Pussy is getting tighter and tighter.”
“I’m there,” I hiss out and close my eyes. Then I feel his hand move away from my ass and the sting of his hand moves through me and I open my eyes again. “I want your eyes on me when you come.”
