“I don’t regret it. I don’t regret any of it,” Ryan replies as he watches me. “At least I got you away from that asshole.”
My eyes shoot up to his. He can’t just crash into my life like this, causing chaos and taking me into dark alleyways. We’re going to getcaught. “I should go home.”
Ryan gestures toward the entrance of the alleyway. “My car is down the street. I’ll drive you there, but we need to talk first.”
“Talk? About what?” My heart drops. Does he somehow already know about the baby?
Ryan gives me a stern look. “You haven’t been yourself lately, and we’re all worried about you. I get we agreed to not do this and that, but you’re killing us.”
Guilt twists in my stomach as I hear the genuine concern in his voice. I didn’t mean to worry them, but there is so much going on that they don’t realize. “I’m sorry.”
“You don’t have to be sorry. You just need to talk to me,” Ryan replies as he holds his hand out to me. “Please, Emma.”
He isn’t the type to beg.
I don’t know what I’m going to tell him, but I know that he won’t let me go home by myself. Ryan also isn’t the type to give up easily.
Without a word—because I have no idea what to say—I place my hand in his.And let him lead me out of the dark.
Chapter thirty
Chapter Thirty: Ryan
After walking around the city in weighted silence, Emma and I end up on a bench in a park, cloaked in the bright glow of a nearby streetlight.
I love being out in the city late at night. There’s a certain peace and comfort in the air that I don’t feel during the day. It’s too busy and chaotic as people rush from place to place, unable to slow down and just enjoy the moment.
This is when I thrive, but I can’t help but feel like I’m treading water right now, trying not to drown under all these waves of uncertainty and confusion.
Why isn’t she talking? What thoughts are so heavy on her mind that she can’t say them out loud?
“You’re worrying me, Em,” I tell her, breaking the silence.
Emma sighs as she brushes her fingers through her hair, fidgeting with the strands anxiously. “There’s just been a lot going on lately. And things are different too. I don’t see you guys every day anymore. I have to figure out a new normal.”
I frown as I gaze at her, wishing she would look at me. At least she’s talking to me, though. I guess that’s a start.
“You can talk to us whenever you want. We don’t have to ignore each other,” I insist as I turn toward her and take her hand.
Emma shakes her head and pulls her hand out of mine, her shoulders tensing up even more. “It’s dangerous being around each other. Look what just happened!”
Her words jab at my heart like an ice pick, piercing deep. Does she really regret our moments together that much? Or is she lying to protect herself?
“I’m sorry that things keep happening. I know it stresses you out because you don’t want anyone to know,” I tell her. “But I care about you. We all do. So, whatever is making you act so weird, just know that you can still talk to us about it.”
Emma lowers her eyes as she wraps her arms around herself. “You’re right. I am stressed. I’m… overwhelmed.”
I move closer to her until the sides of our thighs touch. She doesn’t draw away this time, and it takes everything in me not to wrap my arm around her. I just want her to know that she’s not alone.
“From what?” I ask her.
Emma chews on her bottom lip for a few moments. “The future. What I’m going to do next. What Ishoulddo.”
A sigh drifts from me as I lean back against the bench, crossing my arms over my chest. “I shouldn’t have crashed your meeting like that. Not if you were seriously considering working for him.”
With my whole damn soul, I don’t want her to work for Vincent, but I can’t be some controlling asshole either who tells her what she can and can’t do. I crossed a line.
I let my anger get the best of me.