Page 52 of Christmas with Brother's Best Friends
I breathe through the ache in my chest as I realize that she’s about to leave for good. She probably won’t ever come back to this office again, and her desk will remain hauntingly empty. A painful reminder of what we lost.
Even if the night of Christmas Eve didn’t happen, this goodbye would still be painful. The truth of the matter is that if we hadn’t succumbed to our desires that night, it would’ve happened another night. It was bound to happen.
So, were we always meant to be torn apart too?
“I think that’s all of my things,” Emma says as she hangs the tote bag on her shoulder. “If I forgot anything, just give it to Ethan or Andrew. They’ll get it to me.”
Because she doesn’t want to be with us alone again. She doesn’t trust herself, and I can’t say that any of us are any stronger when it comes to self-control around her.
“Sure,” Josh replies.
Emma glances around and frowns. “I should probably head out.”
“He isn’t going to come back out until you leave,” I tell her, knowing that she’s waiting on Ryan. Knowing him, he’s standing in a closet somewhere, trying to gather himself.
“Yeah, you’re probably right,” Emma sighs. She starts to take a step toward Josh, but she pauses and decides against it. No goodbye hugs.
Too risky.
“Bye, Emma,” Josh tells her with a faint trace of pain in his eyes.
“Bye,” she replies with a sad smile.
Before she can give me a quick goodbye and dart, I step closer to her. “I’ll walk you to the elevator.”
Emma hesitates at first, but she nods. She keeps more distance than usual between us as we head to the elevator, her eyes remaining forward.
She isn’t acting like herself today. She hasn’t acted like herself since waking up Christmas morning, and it kills me to see her like this, knowing I’m part of the reason. I wish I could make her feel better, but that would mean erasing a whole month of thoughts, feelings, and memories, and I can’t do that.
Even if I had the power to, I don’t think that I could bring myself to do it.
“I’m sorry,” Emma whispers as she rapidly blinks her eyes.
“Don’t be,” I reply, not wanting her to drown in her own guilt. It’s truly no one’s fault. She’s just strong enough to make the hard decision for all of us.
Truly, she has the most to lose.
Emma hits the down button next to the elevator door before turning to me. “Goodbye, Max.”
The thought of kissing her flashes through my mind, and I can tell that the same thought goes through hers as her eyes briefly stray to my lips.
“Bye, Em,” I tell her as the elevator door slides open.
Emma steps inside and turns around, her eyes locking with mine. It’s like she wants to say a thousand things, but she can’t get the words out. She won’tlet herselfget the words out.
Can we really pretend? Act like that night never happened? Act like we don’t feel something for each other?
Pressure builds in my chest as words rush to the tip of my tongue, but before I can say a single one of them, the elevator door slides shut.
Chapter twenty-four
Chapter Twenty-Four: Ryan
“Imiss you. I want you. I need you.”
I tighten my jaw as Emma rocks herself on my lap, her breathy, whispered words filling my head. My hands slide up her back, holding her close to me as our bare bodies move together. The heat rolling through my body grows hotter and heavier, clouding my mind with a hot haze.
“You have me. Always,” I tell her as I grab her hips, helping her grind down on me as we both get closer to the edge.
