Page 57 of Between Never and Forever
The words he didn’t say echoed loud and clear in that room.When we left each other.
“So, let’s do what we wantnow, then.” I wasn’t holding back. Not this time. I glanced over his body and murmured, “Why are you always dressed and I’m not?”
“You’re learning. Not me.” He pointed to his dresser where a large mirror hung behind it. “Get up and go put your hands on the dresser.”
I scooted off the bed and walked slowly past him to do as he asked. He came to stand behind me, and I looked at how tall he was with his chest to my back. I was almost a whole head smaller than him but seemed to fit perfectly there. He wrapped his arm around my waist, and we took a step back together. Another. And another until my arms were mostly outstretched and I was bent at the waist the way he wanted me to be. My ass was on display for him. My legs flexed a bit as he pulled me up so I was on my tiptoes. He massaged my cheek and murmured, “I like control, Keelani.”
“So, control me.” I breathed out once, then twice.
“I intended to before I knew you were a—”
“I’m not anymore.” I knew he was going to say I was a virgin, but that didn’t matter. Our past didn’t matter now. I looked over my shoulder to glare at him. “You’ve fucked enough women, Dex. I’m sure of it. You can learn to treat me like the others you’ve been with.”
“You’re nothing like the others I’ve been with,” he growled.
But I could be. Didn’t he understand that? “Well, I want to be. I want to understand my sexuality, what I like and what I don’t. I want to experience things I haven’t, Dex. So, just…control me.”
His jaw ticked as I looked at him through the mirror. “I’m not saying I want you like anyone else. Jesus, Kee. You’re asking for a lot. A lot more than what I gave you the first time. You need to work up to—”
I didn’t need any of that. I pushed my bare ass against his hard cock and rolled it. He growled at the sensation. “I need you to show me what it’s like to crave something.”
“You don’t need that right now.”
“If you won’t, I’ll ask someone else, Dex.”
“You’re my fiancée. You’re not asking another man to do a thing to you.”
“I’m yourfakefiancée. I won’t beseenwith anyone else. But if we want to do stuff privately—”
His firm grip became bruising as he gritted his teeth to say, “You do anything privately or publicly with another man, and I’ll make it my sole purpose in life to obliterate him.”
I hummed and arched my back so we both saw every curve of my naked frame in that mirror. “If I can’t learn from you, who will I learn from?” I wanted to push him, he had to know that.
“Open the top drawer,” he growled out, and I felt the shift in his mood.
His eyes simmered with darkness as he caught mine in the mirror. I froze the second I pulled that top drawer open. I knew what would be in it. Still, my heart lodged in my throat. Lined in velvet were tools he used when he fucked women. A small whip, vibrators, anal beads, handcuffs, ropes.
He let me stare at it quietly as if he wanted me to take it in. “Now you see what I’m into?”
I was getting a better idea. I pushed him further. “This it?”
“Well, that black chair in the corner of the room is a sex chair. Made for fucking you at every angle possible,” he told me, and suddenly I realized why he hadn’t sat down on it with me the night I lost my virginity. “Now that you understand, you can close it, Kee.” He rubbed my pussy again and slid one finger in. “I don’t normally lose control in the bedroom. But I’m happy to make you lose control real quick. It’s how I live my life now.”
“Now?” I whimpered at how he slid another finger in and then moved them back and forth over an extremely sensitive spot. “What about before?”
“Before, I was a kid. Before, I made mistakes.” He curled his fingers in me like he wanted me to stop talking about it, which I did because he was immediately easing my tension, immediately tapping into my libido instead.
“Close the drawer,” he murmured against my ear. “I’ll still make you feel good. But it’s better if we go slow and—”
I didn’t want to shy away from it. “You used these on other women?”
“Yes.”
I gasped as his thumb grazed my clit. “With your ex?”
“Kee—”
I stared at that dresser drawer, too many emotions flowing through me as he pleasured me. My hands were white-knuckling the wood now, and I was panting even as I told him, “Get rid of anything you have in that drawer, Dex, if you used it with another woman.” I shouldn’t have been this jealous. Not this fast. Not with this much vehemence.
