Page 110 of Attached At Heart
“We’re going to do this,” she confirmed, making my blood run hot. And then she confessed shyly, “It’s been years.”
“That’s okay,” I said.
She had no fucking idea howokaywith that I was. I would have survived if she’d told me something different, like that maybe her fake relationship with Austin had come with benefits, too. But I might have also spiraled a little bit at hearing it.
“You dragged me out to a party,” she said with a sigh. “And I?—”
“Idragged you to a party? Fuck, I don’t need to hear the details,” I interrupted. Because Christ, I didn’t think I would make it through a retelling that involved other men touching my wife. “I don’t like thinking about assholes having their hands on you.”
“Well, I’m pretty sureyouhad your hands on another girl you disappeared with. And I don’t know. I think I might have been—” She choked on the last word, and I wanted to beg herto continue. And then she did, and my jaw nearly dropped. “Jealous,” she admitted.
“No.” I tipped my head back with a groan. “Jealous, Lane?”
She’dbeen jealous? She thought I’d been with another woman, andshe’dbeen jealous? I wasn’t sure I could stomach the fact that Delaney had slept with someone else because she’d been jealous of someone being with me. I didn’t know how to wrap my head around the truth of that.
“Yeah.” She grimaced. “I’m not proud of it, but…I don’t know. I guess even though I’ve always understood what our relationship is, I never really liked, um, sharing you with other girls.”
Fuck everything.
“You didn’t need to be—shit.” I broke off with a sigh.
“Well, did you?” she pushed after a slight pause.
“What?”
My brain was too busy spinning to keep up with this conversation.
“Were you—” She bit down on her lip before shaking her head. “Never mind.”
But now that I’d taken a second to work through things, I was pretty sure I understood what she was asking.
“Are you wondering if I slept with someone that night? Because the answer is no.”
“Do you even know the night I’m talking about?”
“Doesn’t matter, Delaney.” She really had no idea. “I haven’t had sex since before grad school. Since before…”Since before I met you.“It’s been a long time.”
“What?” Delaney’s lips parted in surprise. “What about all your other dates, dating apps, everything?”
All I could do was shrug, looking up at the ceiling. “It just…never progressed that far.”
Delaney stared at me. I could see her out of the corner of my eye. “I don’t understand.”
I glanced over at her, partly wishing I could just lay it all out on the table right now. But our relationship had already gone through a massive restructuring in the last twenty-four hours, and I hadn’t played the long game with Delaney just to fuck it up when I finally got close to the end. I might want to sprint to the finish line, but she’d only just joined the race. I needed to give her a little time to catch up.
“I went on all those dates to find someone to marry, but I was never going to marry any of them, Lane.”
There was only one woman in this world that I imagined myself married to, and she currently had my ring on her finger. Dream come fucking true, even if it might all come crumbling down in less than a year.
“What?” she breathed, her brows drawing together. “Why?”
Because they weren’t you.
I looked back to the ceiling before answering. “Just wasn’t right. And sleeping with them when I knew that I wasn’t going to marry them…” It didn’t feel right.
“But it’s okay to sleep with…well, I guess wearemarried, aren’t we?” A humorless chuckle fell out of her lips, and I understood the laughter. Everything felt a little bit funny right now.
My eyes found hers again, and I cupped her cheek, our eyes meeting. Heat spiraled through me from that simple touch. That simple look. “Yeah, Lane.” I brushed my thumb along her jawline, and her breathing picked up. Mine did, too. “We are.”
