Page 63 of Wrecked
“I love you, you know,” I say with as much conviction I can muster up.
The corner of his mouth lifts in a small smile. “I know,” he whispers. “I love you too.” He squeezes me to him, and I melt into his safe embrace. This is where I am meant to be, in Nate’s arms, safe and protected. It was alwaysmyspace. It was never Katie’s to fill. I think deep down, she knows that too.
The roar of thunder in the distance brings my thoughts back to the present and extinguishes the comfort I find in Nate’s arms. A bright flash of lightning has us pulling apart. Nate curses as he releases my body and grabs my hand. He starts walking us toward the direction we came from, back to where the flood swept us away.
“We’re going the wrong way. The flood took us in the right direction, toward the rocks,” I say as I try to pull him in the opposite direction. “Though I would have preferred walking on my own two feet,” I mumble, feeling the aches and pains I was too distracted to feel before now.
“I know, but I hung our basket on a tree right before the flood wiped us out. We need to go back for it. We can’t do another night without food.”
I look up to the dark, ominous sky. The storm doesn’t appear to be letting up, and we don’t know how long it will last. Food really does need to be a priority, but I wouldn’t put it above our lives. The moment of peaceful comfort I felt inNate’s arms is replaced by my annoyance at the situation we are in.
“If we don’t survive this storm, food won’t matter,” I quip, my tone harsher than intended.
“Whenwe survive this storm, it won’t matter if we don’t have the energy to move tomorrow,” Nate throws back, his tone much nicer than mine.
“How are you so positive?” I ask, exasperated. “We’re stuck in the jungle, in the middle of nowhere…not a soul knows where we are! But this whole time, you’ve just been…soannoyingly optimistic that it makes me feel crazy every time I feel scared!”
Nate sighs, dropping my hand and turning to face me. “You know, Ellie, you pick the worst times to have these little arguments.”
“Littlearguments? Well excuse me for not being like you,Mr. Perfect-During-Dangerous-Situations. But I need to talk through my anxiety, so…just fucking deal with it.”
He lets out a harsh laugh. “I’m far from perfect, Pip. If I were perfect, we would never have been on that damn flight. We’d be safe at home inourbed, a bed we would have shared since the second you graduated high school. You wouldn’t be scared right now or annoyed at mypositive outlook. One that I’mfucking faking, Ellie. For you. Because everything I do is for you!”
Well.Thatshut me up.
“I…I’m sorry, Nate.” I lower my head, embarrassed. I can’t seem to hold myself together. He’s living through the very same trauma, yet I keep breaking down on him, and he doesn’t deserve it. “I appreciate everything you are doing to keep us safe. I’m sorry I keep losing my shit, I’m just so scared.”
“I don’t want you to besorry. You’re allowed to be mad, okay? You’re allowed to be scared. We are experiencing something pretty fucking terrifying. It’sokayto feel that. But I’mgoing to stay positive for us, Pip, because I’m not going to stop trying. I finally have you again. You can deny that if you want, but it’s true. So, I’m not giving up. I’m not lettingyougive up. Whether we are rescued tomorrow, or in six goddamn years…I’m going to make sure we have everything we need to survive here, tothrivehere. Because it doesn’t matter where I am, or what cards I’ve been dealt…if I have you with me, it’s worth it. It all becomes worth it.” Nate’s chest heaves, though his grip on my hand remains gentle. I stay quiet, having no idea what I can say to all of that.
Almost as if on cue, thunder rumbles like the roar of a beast, matching the energy pouring out of Nate. The wind screeches through the trees, and the sound of falling branches surrounds us. Without comment, we start walking again, avoiding uprooted trees while remaining far away from the riverbank. We’re quiet for several minutes as we hurry back toward our basket of food.
“I wasn’t going to deny it,” I mumble, finally breaking the intense silence between us. Nate looks down at me, staring for several seconds before an arrogant smile takes over his face.
“I know.” He smirks, reminding me so much of the cocky eighteen-year-old boy I once knew. I shake my head, grinning as I nudge him with my shoulder. Despite everything happening right now, being with him feels easy.
I wonder how it is going to feel when we get home. How will Katie ever forgive me?
That’s easy. She won’t. I know this because I can hardly forgive her for taking Nate from me to begin with, and she didn’t even know he was mine.
Nate reaches down and takes my hand in his, threading our fingers as we walk. It feels natural, like he never stopped holding my hand. He runs his thumbs across my knuckles, and I feel safe despite our circumstances. Thoughts of Katie disappearright along with my guilt. Nate was always meant for me, and I won’t let anything come between us again.
I revert my attention to the path in front of me. Our quick pace causes me to slip and slide on the wet terrain, but I manage to keep up. I have to. We need to get out of the rain if we even have a prayer of surviving the night. I already feel a chill settling deep in my bones. We desperately need a fire, or the last two days will be for nothing.
“There.” Nate points ahead. The tree holding our food is submerged in quick-moving floodwater with no way to get to it.
“There is no way we can reach that.” I curse, annoyed that nothing seems to be going right for us.
“I think I can climb that tree,” Nate points to the adjacent tree, “and jump onto the branch of the other tree.”
“You’ll fall and break your neck, Nate!” My voice trembles at the thought.
“It’s not that far. I can make it,” Nate replies with a confidence I don’t feel.
“How will you get back? Come on, Nate, this is a stupid idea! It’s going to get you killed,” I warn, knowing I’ve already lost him as he rounds the tree and starts assessing the distance. He finds the path he wants to climb and then marches back over to me. He grabs my face gently and gives me a chaste kiss.
“I love that I get to do that whenever I want. Be right back.” He grins, like he’s not about to risk his life for a couple coconuts and some wildflowers.
“If you fall and die, I’m going to kill you,” I call to his back. His shoulders shake with laughter, and I can’t help but smile to myself.
