Page 44 of Wrecked
Do I feel like I betrayed my sister? Yes. Am I engulfed with guilt? Absolutely. But I’m not naive to the reality that I still love him. I am not naive to the truth of this trip. I tried to convince myself that nothing would happen between Nate and I, but that was just the tale I needed to tell. One that gave me the courage to board a plane with my sister’s fiancé. With a man I coveted, one I furtively hoped to make mine again. The thought is jarring, but it’s the truth. I was never going to be ok withallowing her to keep him. Not when he’s always belonged to me.
Regardless of our past…he’s mine.
It’s not the moment I just shared with him that I regret. It’s my selfishness. My complete disregard for the heart of a person who means the most to me. The most, next to him. Because if I’m completely honest with myself, Nate will always come first.
He’s my person. Even when I hated him, he was my person. Part of me always knew that if I ever really needed him, I had him. Part of me always knew that he hurt me to protect me. I just don’t know what he was protecting me from.
All I know is he just risked everything to get me to this island. Our plane broke apart in the sky, and Nate and I are the only survivors. I am still here because of him. The second we reached land, the only thing I could think about, the only thing that made sense, was to put my lips on his. At that moment, for the first time in my life, I didn’t think of anyone but me.
While I’m ashamed of how quickly I’d abandoned my promise to Katie, I can’t pretend it was a promise I envisioned keeping. On the surface, that’s what I told myself. A nice, fabricated narrative invented to protect myself from the truth. A tale woven in fantasy where I could remain a virtuous, respectable woman who lived her life taking the moral high ground. Someone worthy of her sister’s love.
Deep down, I knew the reality. My faithfulness belongs to my heart, and Nateismy heart.
I know breaking that promise will break us, and I’m not ready to lose my sister. Not until I know the truth behind why I’m destroying us. Because Iamgoing to lose my sister. I don’t get to keep them both.
Nate doesn’t just get to have me, though. I can’t let him repossess my heart and soul until I know that they’re going to be safe with him this time. I need to hear his motivation for doing what he did to me in high school.
For being with mysister.
I hear Nate dressing beside me, and I peek over at him as he tucks his still-hard cock into his pants. Now that our hormones are under control, the heaviness of our situation hits me.
“We should probably make ourselves visible,” I clear my throat at the awkwardness between us, “so that the rescue plane will see us.”
Nate hesitates. “Pip…” his worried expression pins me in place, “before you woke up…fuck,” he curses, struggling to get the words out. “Before you woke up, the pilot made an announcement.”
“What…what did he say?” I bite down on my lower lip, a nervous habit of mine.
“They lost communication with the towers. We were turning around, trying to find a closer airport to land so they could address the problem.”
“How…um…how long did we not have any communication?” I ask, my voice trembling.
“About an hour, baby…”
“So…so no one knows we crashed?” I ask, even though I already know the answer.
Nate looks down like he’s gathering the courage to say what he is going to say next. When his eyes meet mine again, for the first time since we crashed, I see fear in them. “No. No one knows that we crashed…and no one knows we turned around.”
CHAPTER 22
NATE (SENIOR YEAR, HIGH SCHOOL)
Idrive over the familiar curb, my truck bouncing along the fractured cement as I wind my way up the battered driveway. The rutted pavement forces me to reduce my speed or end up with a flat tire. Ellie’s beat up Cavalier is not parked in her normal spot. She must still be at the library, studying.
That’s good, I’m not here for her.
I get out of my truck and slam the door shut—loud enough to get his attention. When I don’t see movement in the house, I walk to the back of my truck to get what I need from the trunk. His pretty black Escalade sits in the drive, a harsh contrast to the deprived condition of his meager home. The lustrous black hue shines brightly under the sun, the painted exterior in perfect condition. Not a nick or a scratch in sight.
I walk over to his prized vehicle wondering how much time and attention he puts into caring for it. It’s washed and waxed and perfectly maintained. That’s a shame.
I pull my arm back and swing it forward with all my strength. The baseball bat in my hand connects with that driver’s side window, causing the glass to shatter onto thepavement at my feet. I walk around to the front of the car and swing at both headlights, smashing the plastic cover that protects each bulb. I rear back again, this time hitting the hood of the car and leaving several dents in my wake. I continue my assault around the entire vehicle, busting out every window, popping every tire, and denting every inch of the flawless paint.
Leaving the car unlocked was his second mistake. I wouldn’t have been able to do as much damage if the alarm sounded sooner. His first mistake was putting his fucking hands on Ellie. That mistake comes with a price.
I open the car door and hit the panic alarm, then step behind the vehicle and wait. A few seconds later, I hear the front door slam open as Chris emerges from his home.
“What the fuck. WHAT THE FUCK!” he yells when he sees the damage I inflicted on his car. He runs over to the driver’s side, cursing the whole way. I walk out from the back of the car and stand behind him as he assesses his destroyed vehicle.
I grab ahold of his sweaty white t-shirt and push him forward, forcing the front of his body up against the Escalade. I pin him in place with my legs as he struggles against my hold.
