Page 14 of Wrecked
Ihit the alarm button on the key to my truck as I make my way toward the school. This is the fifth Saturday I’m meeting Ellie for a tutoring session, and it’s already made a substantial difference with my quiz scores. She has this unique way of helping me understand the material. It probably has to do with the fact that I can’t help but stare at her mouth when she talks. I could probably sketch every line, crease, and divot in those full, pouty lips.
When we aren’t studying, we talk about literally everything and absolutely nothing. Even with the nothingness, she’s gotten to know me better than anyone in my life. I told myself to keep her at a distance, but that lasted all of two weeks. Her sweet smiles and cute giggles captivate me like no one I’ve ever met before. She makes me want to open up and be vulnerable with her. I feel comfortable, like I’ve known her forever and can tell her everything without feeling embarrassed. I don’t, though. I don’t want her to look at me like I’m a weak failure. I couldn’t stomach it if she saw me that way. So, even though she getsNate, and everyone else getsNathan, she still doesn’t really know me.
I jog across the courtyard just as the sky opens up and lets out a torrential downpour. The bright October sun is swiftly replaced by dark, angry clouds, making it appear much later than it really is. I run through the front door of the building in record time, but still manage to get soaked. I attempt to ring the excess water out of the bottom of my hoodie as I walk down the corridor toward the library. It’s the only layer I have on considering it’s still early autumn and the temperature hasn’t called for heavier attire yet.
As soon as I enter the library, I stop short when I notice Ellie stripped down to a small white tank top. Her sweater is drying on the chair beside her, and her jeans are glued to her legs like a second skin. She twists out rainwater from her long auburn locks, then separates the strands, braiding her wet hair as she waits for me. She must have come in from the other side of the building and got caught in the storm as well. Water trickles down her slender neck and into the cups of her thinblackbra causing her nipples to stiffen from the cold.
Fuck. Me.
I’ve gotten to know Ellie pretty well over the last several weeks and I genuinely love being around her. She’s incredibly sweet, funny without trying, and so damn smart. But my attraction to her? It’s unmatched. I have never wanted someone so bad in my life. Yet eventhathas nothing on this powerful connection we share. I felt it that first day I met her, and it’s been buzzing under my skin ever since. My body has a physical response whenever she is near, and it’s not something sexual…it’s more. It’s like an electrical current running along my veins, letting me know whenever she’s close by. Whether she’s passing me in the hallway at school, or walking into the library to meet for our session, I always know. I can just…feel it. I already know I am not going to want to walk away from her at the end of this semester.
She looks up from the table and catches me staring.Something I do far too often in her presence. That sexy pink blush works its way up her throat and makes me want to fall to my knees and worship her. Jesus. I don’t even recognize myself anymore. I’ve never felt the urge to fall to my knees for a girl before. Though, there are certainly some things I could do on my knees with Ellie standing in front of me. I salivate at the thought of it. I already know she’d be perfect.
I’m also pretty sure she can hear my thoughts because when her eyes reach mine, she almost looks embarrassed. She swallows hard, and I track the movement as the muscles in her neck tighten. Fuck. I’d love to wrap my hand around it and squeeze. The thought is almost my undoing, and I can feel myself start to harden against my jeans.
She clears her throat. “Looks like we both got caught in the rain,” she says, her smile timid, her eyes wide. I track her gaze and realize she’s detected the results of my inappropriate thoughts.
Shit.
Oh well, just roll with it. I wait until she looks back up at me to say, “Are you soaked, Pip?” I grin and wink, displaying a confidence I’m not sure I actually feel. I don’t normally doubt my ability to flirt with girls, but Ellie is different. Around her, I feel both nervous and excited. She makes me want to impress her, but not in the tangible, materialistic way that grabs the attention of other girls. I want to impress her with my intelligence. I want her to be attracted to my kindness and enticed by our conversations. I want her to be captivated by what’s inside my heart.
I want her to seeme, not the guy I show to the world.
“Um, we should probably get started.” She looks away from my erection. “What are you?—”
I drape my hoodie over the chair next to hers, showing off my bare chest. I’m not a total gym rat, but football keeps me in top shape, and I can tell she notices.
“It’s soaked. I’ll be warmer with it off. Is this okay?” I ask. Not wanting to make her uncomfortable.
“No, yeah. It’s fine. No big deal.Totallyfine. Um, let’s uh…let’s get started.”
I pull out my quiz from earlier this week and slap it on the table. “I present you with the fruits of your labor,” I joke, winking as I slide the paper over to her.
“Holy shit! A ninety-nine!? That’s amazing, Nate,” she squeals and throws herself into my arms. I wrap them around her and huff out a laugh at her excitement. Her hands lock around my waist, and I can’t help but think about how perfect she feels in my arms. I’ve never held her like this before, but it just feels…right. Like she’s meant to be here.
Meant to be mine.
She looks up with sincere excitement. “I am so proud of you, Nate.” Her smile is wide, but her words are quiet as if they are only meant for us in our small corner of the library.
My smile fades as I look down at her. I remove one hand from around her shoulders, using it to trace her brow line down toward the top of her ear. I tuck a piece of hair that’s covering her eye behind the curve of her ear and lean down. Wafts of vanilla and lavender filter into my nose and I decide her shampoo is my new favorite scent.
I bring my lips close, feeling her shiver against my chest. “Thank you,” I whisper softly against the shell of her ear, loving the way her body responds to me.
“For what?” she whispers back.
“For believing in me,” I say as I pull back, scanning her eyes, trying to get a feel for what she’s thinking. “I don’t have a lot of people in my life who do.” That’s the most honest I’ve ever been with anyone. It’s as if I just exposed a raw piece of my soul in hopes of feeling the peace she brings me just a little bit longer.
Her brows pull together and she shakes her head slightly. “Then they’re all dumb, Nate Westin, because you’re going to doamazing things. Keep them on the sidelines and let them watch your success. They’ll regret ever doubting you.”
My breath hitches, her words stirring something in my chest I’ve never felt before. Now, more than ever, I want to get out of here and live my life the way thatIwant. I want to succeed not only to piss off my family, but for me. Because I want to be proud ofmyself. I want to bebetterthan Nathaniel Westin. I want him toknowthat I am better than him. No… I want to live my life as the best version of myself without evencaringif my father knows.
I don’t know when this happened. I don’t even know how this happened. But when I think of the future like that, I don’t see myself thriving alone. It’s crazy to even think, but a large part of me wants to do all of that with Ellie.
Five weeks and I am already a goner.
I look at the girl who has offered me so much in the short amount of time I’ve known her. She’s special, a force to be reckoned with. She’s worth the distraction, because she’snota distraction. She’s becoming the objective, and that scares the shit out of me. When I look into her eyes, that fear of connection is conquered by the affection reflected back at me. She’s given mesomeoneto look forward to. Not justsomething. I’ve never had that before. I tried to avoid connections that would keep me rooted in place, but I never considered the possibility of growing with them.
I slowly lean forward, adjusting my stance and letting her know my intention. My heart is beating out of my damn chest. I’m so close that I can feel her breath as it feathers across my lips. Her breathing is as heavy as mine, the anticipation building between us. I bring my hand to her cheek, the other still wrapped around her shoulders, pulling her closer. I can feel the outline of her breasts against my chest, and I nearly groan from the weight of it. Her hands glide higher up my back, nails tickling my bare skin. I move my lips against hers, barely brushingthem back and forth. Her eyes close and I press my mouth more firmly against hers, letting my tongue slide along her bottom lip.
