Page 20 of The Older Brother
“Do you know Chad?” the woman asks, pulling my attention back across the aisle to her.
I shake my head and offer a soft smile.
“Oh, I figured maybe you did. Most of us regulars do.” She settles into her seat, but I keep my gaze fixed on her, suddenly curious about Chad, the bus regular, and wishing she’d share more.
“I take it you know Chad?” I prompt.
She shakes with a silent laugh and leans toward me while waving her hand.
“I would hope so. He comes to the apartment for dinner every Sunday.”
We’re both laughing, though I’m not entirely sure why, as I’m not certain how I’m supposed to have known that. There’s something about the woman, though, that sets me at ease.
“How long have you known Chad?” I ask, bracing myself as the bus jerks to life and the driver closes the door and shifts into drive.
“Let’s see . . .” She looks up at the bus ceiling, her lips moving with silent counting before she drops her gaze back to me and declares, “Seven years.”
“How did you meet?” I’m really having to work at piecing together this Chad mystery.
“I live at the Beatitudes. Chad works in building maintenance, and the day I moved in, my sink decided to explode all over my cabinets and flooring. Chad fixed it right up, though.” She leans toward me and waves me to do the same, like she’s about to reveal a secret. I do as she asks, and she cups her mouth.
“He replaced the flooring for me, too, even though he wasn’t supposed to. He wouldn’t say so, but I know he went and bought the tiles himself. I’ve been feeding him Sunday dinner ever since.” She sits upright and crinkles her eyes as she smiles. I find myself matching her expression, and I turn back to glance at Chad again with a sudden warmth in my chest.
We get to the retirement home’s stop about ten minutes later, and Chad pulls out his earbuds and winds up his cord before stuffing them in the pocket of his well-worn jeans. I help the woman make her way down the bus steps while Chad carries her walker. He sets it up for her, then takes over holding the grocery bags as the two of them walk toward the entrance. Mygaze lingers on the pair for a few seconds, my mouth stretching up on the corners as Chad makes her giggle, and she responds by squeezing his arm. There’s a definite sense of envy in my chest, but it’s not like the feeling I had when I saw Caleb kiss another girl. It’s more like the way my insides feel when my dad sends me photos from one of the cities he’s in, or from some stage in the middle of Ohio in a bar with hundreds of people there to hear him play. I long for those texts from him, and I know I can’t exactly tag along for the ride. But I hate not being a part of his routine. And there’s a part of me that wishes the woman had dropped me an invite to Sunday dinner.
It takes another twenty minutes to reach the express line, and as I predicted, I need to sprint from the bus to get the next one in time. The only seat left is smack in the middle, and I have to climb over a burly man to sit by the window. I tried waiting for him to shift or get up, but he was clearly more interested in making me feel small and intimidated. The feel of his khaki-covered meat legs rubbing against my thighs while I stepped over him lingers until we reach the downtown hub. Thankfully, he’s quick to exit his seat, and he heads the opposite direction from me when we get off the bus.
I’ve worked up a good sweat by the time I reach the lobby of my mom’s building, so I pace in the cool entryway as I send her a text alerting her that I’m here. A full minute passes without a response, which means she’s either in a meeting or on her office phone, so I let my head fall back as I blow up at the few strands of hair stuck to my forehead and shuffle my way toward the bank of elevators.
Karma kicks me right in the teeth the second the doors open, though, as standing there wearing dark gray suits are the brothers who have monopolized my thoughts for the last twenty-four hours.
“I didn’t know you were coming in,” Caleb says, his mouth forming a surprised grin as he moves to one side to make space for me.
I hover in the doorway.
“Weren’t you getting off here?” I jerk my thumb over my shoulder and bounce my gaze between the two men.
“Yeah, but that can wait. I’ll take you up,” he says, moving his attention to his brother, who also seems hesitant to leave the elevator. “You go on, Rowan. I’ll meet you at the car.”
Rowan’s deep chuckle is swift.
“Yeah, not a chance,” Rowan says, reaching across my body to the buttons and pressing the nineteenth floor to close the doors again promptly.
I stare straight ahead as the lobby disappears, squeezed between two metal doors that seal me off from an escape. The silence makes the space feel tighter, plus it’s easier to hear the squeal of the gears and belt working to take us nineteen stories up. I swear to God, if this elevator breaks right now, I’m going to have to do some serious reflecting on my sins.
I can feel Caleb’s eyes on me to my left, so I shift my gaze to the right, where Rowan is typing something on his phone, probably trying to avoid having to speak.
“Are you learning the ropes too?” I ask, pulling his attention away from his screen. His eyes blink a few times as his mouth contorts between the hard line that comes naturally and the irritable smile I provoked.
“No.”
I hold my eyes open on his for a beat, waiting for him to elaborate, but when his mouth shifts into a triumphant grin, I accept that’s all I’m going to get for now.
“Huh. Okay, then,” I say, turning my attention back to the metal doors about a half second before they open.
I step out to the right, toward my mother’s office, thankful Rowan heads straight ahead to the leather sofa by the windows. Unfortunately, Caleb tails me into my mother’s office, which sadly she isn’t in, leaving me with no choice but to speak to him alone.
“What’s the deal with you and my brother?” He’s trying to sound curious and light, but I can hear the edge of jealousy in his tone.
