Page 51 of The Trust We Broke
The only thing of mine I left behind in the apartment was my engagement ring. Unlike the one Grudge had given me, it held no sentimental meaning.
The air is crisp when I step outside. Not so cold I’m going to freeze before I’ve got a sweat going. The snow crunches beneath my feet as I run, but I step off the sidewalk onto the asphalt of the road, where the snow isn’t sticking because of the vehicles riding over it.
I breathe in for three strides, blow it out for two.
Steady and repetitive.
With every footstep, I get one step closer to turning my brain off. Main Street peters out. The sidewalk disappears. There is nothing in front of me but wide-open space and fresh air.
I used to run a lot when I was younger. Mainly to escape my home. I think of my complicated relationship with my father. When I was younger, I felt the stature that came from being his golden offspring. The apple of his eye.
I was the poster child of being the chosen one.
I was probably a little precocious with it.
My father loved me when I was innocent and malleable enough to be the person he wanted me to be.
As soon as I became a teenager, forming my own opinions on social matters like school shootings, police violence, and warmongering, my father distanced himself while increasing his intolerance for my every misstep.
When I questioned the land rights of our estate, my father accused me of disloyalty to the family and said it was something thathappened years ago and is therefore not our fault.
As an adult, we have no common ground that the disparity between us is insurmountable.
The pathway narrows, and I find myself heading up the side roads that lead to the Iron Outlaws Clubhouse, even as I try to convince myself it’s just because I want to do a rolling hill run out in the wild instead of some preprogrammed run on the treadmill in the apartment building that looked out onto the busy traffic just south of Central Park.
My music keeps me company, and I run to the beat of the playlist I curated for days like this. It’s uplifting, loud, fun.
Despite the circumstances with my father. Despite the way I feel about being in Grudge’s orbit, in spite of Henry cheating on me, I finally feel like I can breathe.
Until the roar of motorcycle engines breaks through the music.
And the bikes riding double wide force me to jump out of the way and I cry out as my ankle buckles beneath me.
14
GRUDGE
“Fuck,” I curse, when I see Lucy disappear over the embankment in my side mirror.
We’re riding as a convoy, pretty fast because there isn’t usually anyone on these roads, but not at full speed because of the conditions. I put up my hand to slow us to a stop and let Smoke pull up alongside me.
“I’m going back to check she’s okay,” I say to him. “Lead everyone else.”
“You want me to go back and do it?” Smoke says.
I shake my head. “Nah. I got it. Technically, my bike was the first one she jumped away from.”
I turn my bike around and pull over to the side as the rest of the guys ride on. Eight bikes pass me as I silently fume. What the hell is she doing out here by herself after two Rebels chased her?
Atom raises an eyebrow as he goes by.
I know what he’s thinking. I should stay away from Lucy if I’m not sure what I’m doing around my ex-wife.
Hell, I’m thinking it too.
And yet…I ride down the hill a little, just in time to see Lucy emerge back above the embankment. There’s a leaf in her hairand a smudge of dirt on her nose. At the top, she bends and touches her knee gingerly where there is a rip in her running tights.
When she sees me headed toward her, she turns and begins to limp back into town. Deep down, I know I should just let her. But her independence and stubbornness were actually things I always found cute.
