Page 29 of Bonus Daddy
The boyish smirk that brightened his face made my heart melt a little. The beard, the deep golden-brown eyes, and the rolled-up shirtsleeves had a slightly different effect on me. One that wasn’t appropriate for a client to have for her lawyer.
“Yup. I would have made you a mix CD, but I doubt you have a CD player.”
“Does that mean you still have a CD burner after all these years?” he teased. “You were the music girl. The mix CDs you made for me are probably in a box somewhere in my dad’s garage.”
I chuckled to myself. I’d made him so many CDsback then. It was my love language. “No.” For a minute, I wished I had. “Instead, I made you a Spotify playlist.”
I held up my phone. “Here, I’ll text you the link.”
When his phone chimed in his pocket, he pulled it out, and with a smile, he scrolled through.
Nerves skittered through me, and my face heated. “You might hate it.”
“I do not hate it at all.” He peered at me through his lashes. “These are our songs.”
A giggle escaped me. “Early aughts grunge and punk. All our faves from college.”
He ran his hands through his hair and chuckled. “The Offspring? Amazing.”
My body relaxed as he continued scrolling, a sense of ease washing over me. All those years ago, just being in his presence calmed me, and apparently, it still did.
“Just Breathe.” He stopped, and this time, when he looked at me, he straightened and made pointed eye contact.
Instantly, I was transported back to that night in Fenwick Hall. We’d been hanging out for a couple of weeks, and I had a major crush on him. We sat side by side on the twin bed in his dorm room, a giant tapestry covering the cinder block wall across from us.
When this song came on, we talked nervously about how much we loved Pearl Jam. Before the music ended, he got bold. He leaned in, tucked a strand of hair behind my ear, and kissed me.
Our first kiss.
That song was the soundtrack to a lot of our firsts.
My warm cheeks now burned. I should not have included it. Stupid Jess. But I’d been so deep in nostalgia as I made my choices that I hadn’t thought of how awkward this moment would be.
“It was our song,” he said.
It was. How had I forgotten? So many nights, we lay wedged into that tiny twin, snuggled under his baseball-themed comforter, planning for the future.
A nebulous concept. Adulthood was something we talked about as if we had any idea what it might bring.
“I’m sorry.” I shook my head. This was a terrible idea. I had been shooting for a kind gesture, something fun. Instead, I’d sent us straight into an awkward trip down memory lane.
Internally, I cursed myself. Why couldn’t I just act like a normal human being around him?
He’d been my first love, yes, but it was that young, consuming kind of love many find in college and move on from. We’d parted amicably and gone our separate ways into adulthood. And since then, he’d been a fond memory. He hadn’t broken my heart; the situation had. We’d been heading in different directions, and at the time, each of our families needed us.
He smiled intermittently as he scrolled, and eventually, he looked up, his golden eyes shining. “Thank you. This means a lot to me.”
“Pfft.” I waved a hand. “Please. What you did to Kenneth means a lot. And like I said, I’m broke,” I said, my words coming out quickly, nervously. “This is the best I can do. Unless you accept payment for legal services in sexual favors?”
His eyes widened comically at the rate my stomach plummeted.
Stupid Jess and my stupid mouth. I could feel my face turn purple, and I looked down at the sad gold carpet and willed a hellmouth to open and swallow me whole. I’d rather face down Satan and his hellhounds than look Brian in the eye right now.
“No. Not like that,” I said, waving frantically, wishing I could bat the absurd statement away. “I will pay your bills with real money, of course. That I make, you know. At my job. I don’t know why I said that. Please ignore me.”
He only blinked in response.
“God, you must be so insulted.” My entire body was on fire, my armpits suddenly sweaty. “Here you are, a serious professional, then there’s me. I’ll show myself out.”
